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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23878870">Bright and Beautiful</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Endlessnightlock/pseuds/endlessnightlock'>endlessnightlock (Endlessnightlock)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Flower shop owner! Katniss, Jelly- Johanna/Delly, Mrs. Mellark is given the decent mom treatment in this story :), Mutual Pining, Peeta is just what she's been needing whether she's aware of it or not, Sexual Content, Tattoo artist! Peeta, Unplanned Pregnancy, discussion of lgbt issues, divorced Mellark family, katniss has trust issues, lgbt side characters, talk of an accident resulting in an amputation, tatttoo studio/flower shop a/u</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-03 01:42:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>47,399</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23878870</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Endlessnightlock/pseuds/endlessnightlock</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Katniss and Peeta own neighboring business- hers is a flower shop she runs with Prim, his business is a new-to-the-neighborhood tattoo parlor. What happens when the two get to know each other? Will Katniss let her guard down and open herself up to him?</p><p>Chapter One contains parts 1-4 that I originally posted on Tumblr.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Katniss Everdeen &amp; Primrose Everdeen, Katniss Everdeen/Peeta Mellark</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>320</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>308</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Katniss blew the loose hairs out of her eyes with a huff, taking a step back to survey her work. There was technically the right amount of everything in the jar- a custom dyed, blue jean Mason- their shop's signature design, but this bouquet was for Ms. Mags. Her neighbor had just welcomed her first grandchild, and Katniss wanted this arrangement to be unique.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Katniss knew she was probably overthinking it, the flowers were fine, but Prim was out running deliveries right now, so there was no one else to ask.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The doorbell went off while she was ruminating on what could improve the arrangement, alerting her that someone was in the shop. "Be out in a minute," Katniss called, not in any hurry to go out front. It was around the time of day Haymitch usually dropped off her mail, and this late in the day, they didn't typically get many customers.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Okay," a man answered, surprising her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Shoot, it's a customer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Oh, sorry about that," she replied, walking out of the back storeroom, "I thought you were my mailman."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Katniss paused. It was that guy who ran the tattoo parlor next door.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You mean Haymitch?" Peeta answered, his gaze on one of the grab-and-go bouquets in the cooler. He put his hands on the glass and scrunched over, squinting carefully at it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She ignored the question, unsure of what to do. Katniss had never actually talked to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sure, Prim had gone next door and introduced herself when he opened his tattoo parlor last month, and her sister had nothing but nice things to say about him, but Katniss found herself avoiding him nonetheless.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn't that she had anything against tattoos or people with them. She didn't have any herself, but Katniss had found the more people she met who were "inked," the more she realized they were people who knew themselves well and weren't afraid to show others. They didn't seem to be hiding things from the world so much, like the way she tended to do.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Peeta's left forearm, all the way up to his shirt sleeve was covered by its own "sleeve" in a variety of beautiful colors, jewel-toned flowers and birds and other designs she hadn't entirely made out yet. His right arm had less like he'd begun working on that one but hadn't filled it in yet; he looked youngish, she'd guess he was probably about twenty-five like her, so she supposed he had plenty of time to finish it up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His hair was light blond, close-cropped on the sides but longer and dyed a darker shade on top. He had multiple piercings in both ears, and his left leg had a metal prosthetic from the knee down.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When she looked at him, the pleasant tightness forming in the pit of her stomach made it hard to open her mouth. "You can take those out and look at them if you want," she finally said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Peeta glanced over at her, his smile easy. "You must be Katniss?" he asked lightly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"The one and only," she replied.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Peeta laughed. "You're just like your sister said you'd be," he said, turning to look at the bouquet again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>What was Prim doing talking to this guy about me? Katniss thought, scowling at the side of his head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Can I help you with something?" She finally asked when he said no more, wanting to get this over with as quickly as possible.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Do you have any green echeveria succulents in stock?" he asked, finally acknowledging her again. "I have a client that wants one, and I can't recall if I've ever seen them in person."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Can't you just look one up online?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I'd prefer to see them in person," Peeta said, walking across the store towards her. "Realism is everything, don't you think?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Katniss couldn't help but notice how good he smelled once he'd stopped just a few feet away from her with his eyebrow cocked and his large hands spread out on her counter. Must be some type of expensive cologne, she guessed. It kind of surprised her- he didn't look like the type.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Would that be okay?" Peeta asked, his head and voice dropping like he realized maybe he'd acted like a prick. "Your sister told me I was free to stop by and look at whatever you had in stock if I needed to," he added, giving her a look that she would describe as puppy eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Like an idiot, Katniss felt her resolve weaken considerably at that moment. He probably pulled that crap with women all day long.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She bet it worked on most of them, too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Sure," Katniss said, a little grumpily. She knew she sounded off-putting, it was the thing she did best, but whatever it took to get this guy on his way. She didn't like the way he made her feel so restless. "Follow me."</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Peeta bent over the workbench, running a fingertip over the little succulent plant and pulling its leaves apart, examining it closely. Finally, after studying it a few minutes, he slipped his phone out of his back pocket and snapped a single picture.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Get what you need?" Katniss asked from her workstation across the room, where she stood with her arms folded across her chest.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He grinned, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his shorts. "Yeah, I think so. You?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Katniss snorted- and dammit, she hated when that happened. "What could I possibly need from you?" she asked, covering her embarrassment by walking over and stepping around him to pick up the succulent and put it away. She wasn't about to let him get the upper hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Oh, I have all kinds of things to offer," he answered lightly, making her pause in her actions.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You cocky-" she began.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"For instance," he said, stepping around her and placing his hand over hers, halting her motion, freezing her in place.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Oh hell.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"This little beauty would look great with what you're working on," he continued softly, his breath tickling her neck as he pointed to the arrangement she'd been constructing for Mags with his free hand. "Don't you think?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"No," she whispered, too keyed up to move a muscle. Peeta was right of course, the succulent was just what the arrangement needed, but she wasn't going to give him that satisfaction.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Hmm, okay then." Peeta stepped back while she remained in place. "Guess I'll see you around Katniss. Later."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She heard the floorboards creak as Peeta stepped down off the slight rise between the back room and the storefront, and she didn't face forward again until after the door closed behind him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Once Peeta was gone, Katniss sighed, picking up the succulent and walking across the room to add it to the arrangement.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She bit her lip. She could still smell his cologne.</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>"Is your sister here?" Peeta asked, leaning against the counter next to their cash register and looking much too comfortable for her liking. "I wanted to see if she could get me a sample of something."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss briefly glanced up at him with a frown, setting her pen aside. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He'd been stopping in her shop more and more frequently lately- his business must not be doing great if he had all this time to stop by and bug her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>At least she told herself that's what was happening.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"No, she's out right now. And you changed your hair," Katniss added, her eyes going back to the long adding-machine ribbon hanging from her calculator. She'd been double-checking their sales numbers for the last week until he showed up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Aww, you noticed?" Peeta asked, running his fingers through his hair before leaning over the counter and propping his chin up with the other to examine her more closely.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He was standing entirely too close to her again, as usual. Nothing resembling a polite amount of room existed between them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss had noticed over the last month that Peeta didn't seem to have a grasp of the concept of personal space at all; she'd never been around someone so comfortable with touching people or letting them get close to him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It probably had something to do with his line of work. You couldn't be touch-repulsed and still be able to work on people's skin at the same time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And if his proximity affected other women the same way it did her, then Peeta was probably never without a willing- not that she was interested in him herself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>No. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Why was she thinking about him that way? Yes, he was an attractive guy, but way too much, whatever he was for her. And it wasn't like he was </span>
  <em>
    <span>interested </span>
  </em>
  <span>in her or anything. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He was just a big flirt.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I figured it was time to change. My partner said the dark color didn't suit me," he admitted, his eyes cast upward to look at the blond fringe hanging across his forehead. He hadn't worn it slicked back today for once, and because of that, Katniss could tell his hair was wavy. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The ash-blond looked a lot better than that dark brown he'd been sporting, with his fair skin and light blue eyes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss had an urge to touch those waves, for some reason. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Your partner?" she asked instead, her tone deceptively calm. Did he mean like his domestic partner?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"My other artist, Delly," he mentioned her name, and Katniss had a flash memory of a busty blond girl she'd seen around the shop. "We've been friends forever- even tried dating for a while."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss looked at him incredulously. That was something she heard from people on occasion and had the most challenging time wrapping her head around. "And you're still friends with each other after all that?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yeah. Both of us realized we were all wrong for each other before it went too far," Peeta laughed at himself. "I don't know why I told you that. It wasn't even anything serious."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You're lucky," Katniss said. She sighed, pushing aside the calculator, deciding that she'd add the figures up later. She couldn't concentrate with him standing so close- Katniss swore the cologne he was wearing haunted her dreams.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Bad experience dating a friend?" Peeta asked, sympathetically. "Tell me everything. Think of me as your neighborhood bartender or hairdresser." </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She sighed. Why not? Maybe she did need to open up a little more- Peeta seemed to have that effect on her with his easy confessions. "My high school best friend, Gale-"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Guy or girl?" Peeta interrupted.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss rolled her eyes at him. "Guy. Now, can I continue?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Sure, just wanted to know the lay of the land, so to speak," Peeta said. "Wasn't sure with a name like </span>
  <em>
    <span> Gale, I'm</span>
  </em>
  <span> just trying to visualize your backstory here."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Please don't."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He grinned at her. "You can't stop me. But please, continue."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Anyway, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Gale</span>
  </em>
  <span>, as I said, was my best friend for years. We had a lot in common with each other-"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Like what?" Peeta interrupted her. Before she had a chance to answer him, his gaze focused on her face, and he quickly swiped his pointer finger across her cheek. "You had an eyelash," he said by way of explanation. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Are you going to let me tell you this story or what? Just one more interruption, that's it, and I swear-" </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta held up his hands. "I just want more details about this guy. Was he short and skinny?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss laughed at that, leaning back and crossing her arms over her chest. "He was the best-looking guy in school, easily- tall, dark, and handsome as they say. A lot of girls were after him. A lot of them 'caught' him too, I might add," she said with a laugh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"But he didn't do much for you?" Peeta asked softly, a brief smile just flitting across his lips. He looked a little less cocky all of a sudden.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>That made her pause.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I thought of him more like my brother," Katniss answered honestly, deciding not to tease him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her feelings were so freaking confusing, why was she protective of him all of a sudden? "But my senior year he claimed to be in love with me, and I didn't want to lose his friendship, so we dated for a few years. Ended up losing him anyway. I should have done just told him earlier," she sighed. "It would have hurt a lot less."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"That sucks," Peeta said, leaning back. "Sorry to hear that. But no, things weren't like that with Delly and me. I think I managed to help her realize that she liked girls too. Not the only girl I've dated that's happened with, honestly."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss studied him closely. He seemed sensitive about the topic. "Not much luck in love?" she asked, her voice gentle.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He shrugged, plastering a wry smile on his face before answering her. "Not exactly, no."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss shook her head. "I can hardly believe that. You're just so open- I mean, women like that, and you aren't hard to look at either. I don't see that you'd have any issues with your love life."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta's eyes went wide, and the smile that spread across his face and crinkled his eyes in the corners was entirely genuine. "Katniss Everdeen, did you just admit that you find me </span>
  <em>
    <span> attractive </span>
  </em>
  <span>?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh hell.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I think you know you're an attractive man. It's not rocket science," she muttered, looking down at the countertop again. How did she get into these stupid situations? She asked herself, meanwhile readying herself for the next teasing remark.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Well, the feeling is mutual," Peeta said softly, leaning back like he realized he ought to give her a little breathing room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She snorted again. "Yeah, I seem like your type, Peeta," she told him, fully aware that she was small and slight, and her looks mostly consisted of big grey eyes and a thick braid that hung down her back. Katniss wasn't flashy like him; she wasn't inked, she didn't have big breasts or long legs. "You don't have to say things like that to me, it's fine- there's no need to pretend."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Pretend, huh?" he said, before repeating the word incredulously. "Pretend. Kat, why exactly do you think it is I come over here all time?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Things are slow at your shop?" Katniss supplied, refusing to encourage him. This whole situation was ridiculous; there was no way he was </span>
  <em>
    <span>interested </span>
  </em>
  <span>in her. "It's not a big deal, you know."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta was quiet for just a moment, before backing away from the counter. "Okay. Well then. If it's not a big deal to you, then I guess I'll just get going," he told her. "Would you tell Prim I stopped by?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yep. Bye," Katniss said, looking down at her calculator again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>See</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she told herself as she watched him walk around the corner of her building a moment later, </span>
  <em>
    <span>he claimed to be interested in me, but the minute I questioned it, he left.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Just like she thought- he was all show and no go.</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>"Katniss," Prim began, then paused on a sigh. She'd distracted herself in the middle of throwing an armload of rose stems into the refuse container, dropped a few on the way. After tossing what remained of her armful in, she bent and picked up strays from the floor, continuing to berate her sister. "You shouldn't have just brushed Peeta off like that, you know?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was an issue they'd been dancing around. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss knew this conversation was coming, but she scowled down at the swirling grain of the tabletop regardless. She felt uncomfortable enough as it was without giving Prim the satisfaction of reading those feelings in her expression. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She still felt a little raw inside. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Don't worry about it," Katniss said sullenly. "It didn't mean anything to him," she added, running her fingertips across the smooth surface. The words felt more like a lie out here in the open air than they had inside her head, and that was saying something.</span>
  <em>
    
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I can't mean anything to him- </span>
  </em>
  <span>Katniss filled in, mentally. That's</span>
  <em>
    <span> insane.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Prim snorted. "You sound pretty confident about that."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss looked up with exasperation. "Prim, all you have to do is take one look at Peeta to know. He's so confident- he has no trouble expressing himself. If he were interested in me, he would have tried a little harder. He'd have come back by now."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Prim smirked like she'd caught her sister in a trap, and Katniss had to admit that she felt a little bit trapped by her admission. That was why she didn't like to discuss things with others- they always seemed to ferret out those things she hadn't quite latched onto for herself.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Did you </span>
  <em>
    <span>want </span>
  </em>
  <span>him to try a little harder?" she asked, leaning against the counter and crossing her arms over her chest as if she were just settling in for a lengthy discussion. "Your answer to that is the heart of the matter."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Why couldn't Prim just let things go as they were? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"No," Katniss said, flustered, so she walked across the room to grab the broom and begin sweeping up. "That's ridiculous." </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>This whole situation was ridiculous.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You're such a bad liar," Prim said, following her and getting in her way. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"And you haven't noticed that he talks to you as often as he talks to me, maybe more? I don't know why you're so sure it's me he's interested in- why not you." Katniss bit out. "If you think Peeta's so great, you should go out with him."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There was no way Prim could deny the accusation. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss felt the jab of pain the new thought invoked; maybe Little Miss Positivity couldn't see what was in front of her the entire time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She might be kind of a bitch, but at least she was a realist. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>This uneasiness that existed right here between the two of them was why she didn't get her hopes up about anything. The thoughts rushed into her consciousness like the gates of a dam bursting- fast, crushing, dangerous. She thought of all those conversations she'd witnessed between Prim and Peeta and suddenly felt very foolish. He'd probably told her sister he was interested in her too or at least implied it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Had he been flirting with both of them at the same time? Everything was up for misinterpretation, and Katniss was very aware that things rarely worked out for her the way they were supposed to. </span>
</p><p> </p><p><span>There'd been no sure things- not her father who'd died, not Gale who'd been her best friend and should have worked as a romantic partner but wouldn't</span> <span>no matter how much they'd tried. Certainly not college where she'd been miserable, and not even this flower shop she'd thought was going to be her refuge from the world because even this place was frustrating the everliving </span><em><span>hell </span></em><span>out of her lately. That was mostly to do with her sister and a particular owner of the tattoo parlor next door. She loved this place, and yet every day she dreaded coming in here a little more.</span></p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Everything was so stupid- like Katniss was just supposed to cast aside those years of shit she knew to be true in favor of a guy who looked about as unstable and flighty as they came. Peeta could be just as interested in Prim, and just because she felt some connection with him, which was ridiculous enough on its own, didn't mean she was ready to trust him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And now Prim looked pissed at her accusation. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Good, let's get pissed, </span>
  </em>
  <span> Katniss thought. Maybe she'd stop talking about Peeta like he was going to be the answer to everything in Katniss's life- like any man was capable of that. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Don't be an idiot," Prim snarled. "He talks about the shop a little, and I talk about, well, I don't know- whatever, but do you know what our conversations revolve around for the most part?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss shook her head. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>No, she didn't want to know. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>This sick, uneasy feeling sucked- she wanted to forget it. She wanted Peeta to close up his shop tomorrow, and then she'd never have to think about him again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Maybe she could stop thinking about him all the time that way. How attractive he was- the outside yes, but even more than that, his warm personality. His kindness and loyalty. The surprising things she'd learned about him, and all the rest of the stuff she instinctively wanted to know- things that would take days, maybe even years and years to discover.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Not to mention that damn cologne he wore that made her heart beat faster, and her throat thick.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You, Katniss. We talk about you," Prim said finally, her eyes narrowed like she couldn't believe she'd had to say it out loud.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss bit her lip and stepped around her sister with the broom still in hand. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She didn't have an answer to that. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She hadn't been expecting that.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She didn't have an answer to anything.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The two of them spent a few more minutes tidying up, Prim's words screaming in the silence between them while everything she'd been ignoring for the last week raced through Katniss's mind.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Well, that's it," Prim said once they got done putting everything away. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Yep," Katniss managed. She guessed it was.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After taking off her apron and hanging it up, Prim began walking towards the back of their workroom. "I'd better get going. I told Mom I'd pick something up for her-"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"How is there even that much to talk about with Peeta? About me," Katniss interrupted, suddenly aware that she couldn't go back to her quiet little apartment tonight without asking. The unanswered questions would drive her insane. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Prim rolled her eyes but answered anyway. "There just is. There's a ton of things he wants to know because he's </span>
  <em>
    <span>very </span>
  </em>
  <span> interested in you- like I keep trying to tell you."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"There isn't that much to be interested in," Katniss whispered, on the verge of tears for some stupid reason. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>No, that was a lie, and she knew the reason. Peeta was a great guy, and she'd hurt his feelings. She'd taken his confession and tossed it away like it was no more than a joke. She'd treated him like his feelings were a joke.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Prim tilted her head down far enough to get a look at her sister's face, and the harsh tone immediately dropped. Her shoulders slumped. "Kat, don't do that. Don't cry."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss shook her head. "I don't know why I do this stuff to myself," she admitted, wiping the few tears away with the back of her hand. Of course, she didn't have to explain what "this stuff" was to Prim; her sister knew she was standoffish and cold and tended to give people the impression she didn't give a shit about them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But Prim loved her anyway because she knew that wasn't the way Katniss was. "Come here, you big dummy," she sighed, pulling her sister into a tight embrace. "You like him, don't you?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss leaned into Prim's shoulder and sniffled against the cool fabric of her shirt while she rubbed her back. "I do like him a lot, I think. I know I miss seeing him," she admitted. It'd only been a week since their falling out, since his admission that he liked her. She'd shrugged off those words because she couldn't let herself believe them, and they'd scared her because </span>
  <em>
    <span>holy shit </span>
  </em>
  <span>she wanted him too, and that just couldn't be right. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But it was, and she missed seeing Peeta so much it was scary. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"He's right next door, you know," Prim reminded her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I know, but I feel like I fuc-"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You didn't mess anything up, not permanently," Prim corrected her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss just shook her head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Well, maybe a little, but...." Prim stepped back and looked at her sister's face. "It's not like you did something that terrible- you guys aren't in a relationship, and you haven't cheated on him or anything. I think it's just that his feelings are a little hurt, and he's not sure how you feel about him."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You don't know that."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Well, actually I do," Prim admitted, looking away, the guilt written all over her face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss frowned at her behavior. She really should've known better than this from her. "You've been talking to him," she said flatly, aware of the way her sister had just played her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"A little," Prim said, hugging her again. "Don't be mad, please?" she whispered. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You know I can't be mad at you," Katniss said, before swearing softly. "Hell. Now I guess I'd better do something about all of this."</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Katniss pushed that sick, nervous feeling- the one that was trying to crawl its way up and overwhelm her, back down into her gut where she hoped it'd take care of itself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Anxiety and butterflies were already chilling together there, so they might as well have some company.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Not allowing herself to think, she simply acted, opening the door to Peeta's shop. She tried to be as quiet as she could, but there was a jingling bell, similar to the one installed in the flower shop, there to alert that someone had entered the shop.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Hey," the statuesque blond girl, the one who must be Delly and looked much more well suited to Peeta than Katniss did with her full curves and flashy body art, greeted her from behind a desk. She stood up and strolled over, reaching out and hugging her without warning. "I'm so excited to meet you!" she said, sounding entirely genuine. "Peeta talks about you all the time, Katniss."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss tensed at the contact. She wasn't much of a hugs-from-strangers kind of girl. "Hey," was all she managed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"He's not in right now," Delly told her, pulling back but holding on to her shoulders. "He's out on a late lunch- had some clients that ran over, but if you want to get a tat, I can show you some of our books, give you some things to consider."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"No, no. No, that's not why I'm here," Katniss said, cringing. She hated needles. "Umm, I just wanted to leave these if you can make sure he gets them," she added, handing over the bouquet she'd put together. "There's a card attached if you'll make sure he gets it."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The flowers were a colorful blend of vibrant blues and bright greens, with a few paler, muted shades of yellow and orange for contrast. This arrangement had always reminded her of peacocks in the past, but now it just brought to mind the colorful sleeve that covered Peeta's left arm. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The comparison to the flashy bird made her smile. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She hoped he'd get the gist. </span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Katniss stood, her foot hooked behind the other ankle, bent over the work table in the back of the flower shop. She'd been trying to keep busy all day to distract herself from the uncomfortable reality that Peeta hadn't been over to see her yet. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I thought you said his feelings were just a little hurt, Prim," she grumbled under her breath. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Why she kept her tone low, she wasn't sure, because once again she was alone in the shop. Prim had stepped out for a few minutes, but only after giving her another pep talk about being patient with him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The thing was, and they both knew it, Katniss wasn't patient. What she </span>
  <em>
    <span>was </span>
  </em>
  <span>was tired of her sister's words, her tone chipper and airy like she had all the confidence in the world that Peeta was just dying to talk to her again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss frowned down at the flowers spread out across the table. The blooms were part of a new delivery from their wholesaler, and she'd spent most of the last hour of the day doing the necessary, slightly mindless work of separating each thornless rose into individual stalks. Once they were apart, she would place them in buckets to go into their walk-in fridge. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She simply didn't have the brain space for anything more complicated than this right now, despite having a ton of invoices she needed to slog through.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss sighed and straightened up. Her leg was going numb this way. She knew this was ridiculous- it's not like it'd even been </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>long since she left the flowers for Peeta, less than 24 hours in all actuality. She just thought she would have heard something from him by now. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was frustrating the hell out of her, this waiting game she was playing- one she wasn't sure whether they both were engaged in or not. As far as she knew, he could just be over at his tattoo parlor puzzled, wondering what kind of woman sent flowers to a man. Or he could just be tired of her. Decided she wasn't worth the effort.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>That one wasn't hard to believe, because not many people stuck with Katniss long-term. A lot of people didn't take the time to delve beneath her crusty exterior layer.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Over the last day, she'd had entirely too much time to let her mind cycle through all of the self-doubts and suspicions that usually kept her closer to reality. Those thoughts were the ones that would typically stop her from making over the top, romantic gestures like giving flowers to a man, even if Peeta seemed like the type of guy who'd enjoy them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She hadn't quite hit the point where she regretted leaving him the bouquet, not quite, but was getting closer to being there with each passing moment of radio silence. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss was antsy. She kept glancing around the corner and into the storefront every few minutes, despite knowing that the doorbell would alert her to any customers. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Dammit Peeta, some kind of word from you would be nice," she said into the silence of the workroom.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But that wasn't how things usually went, was it? When a person didn't want to see you anymore, they didn't stand up on a figurative chair and gave a heart-felt soliloquy breaking down the reasons why. They ignored you; they made you feel as though you'd never meant anything to them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss would know because she was usually a master of the brush-off. When things had grown uncomfortable with relationships in the past, she'd had no qualms about letting them go- untying the strings of those people from her psyche.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She was probably just getting what she had coming to her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Stop that, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Katniss told herself. She shook her head as though she could physically remove the stupid, self-defeatist thinking. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The back door of the shop opened then, signaling her sister's return.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss kept her eyes down on the flowers. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She'd spent too much of the day mulling over Peeta; she'd run the gamut of emotions from relieved to have made the first gesture, to feeling stressed, to anger over why he hadn't responded. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Now the hopelessness had just settled over her. She didn't feel like talking. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Prim would just have to forgive her if she was a little distant right now. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But a millisecond later, Katniss latched onto the familiar cadence of an uneven footfall. The sound was one she hadn't heard in over a week now, and it signaled to her that the new arrival wasn't Prim. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her heart leaped in her chest a little, but horrifyingly at the same time, tears threatened at the corner of her eyes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He'd come, but why was she crying about it? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tears were completely unwarranted right now. They made her feel weak, unbalanced. She was sure he would take one look at them, slipping down her cheeks and make a run for it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>So Katniss bit her lip and stared down at her hands.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She heard him come into the room and close the door behind him. "Can I come in?" he asked softly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The sound of his voice was like a wave of relief, and she felt herself spiraling down into it, the emotion making the thin veneer of her control crack a little more. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>To buy herself a moment, Katniss nodded brusquely. Turning away from him, she wiped her damp eyes with the back of her hand. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Of course," she said, "you surprised me, that's all. I'm not used to you coming in that way. And I guess," she paused, then just decided to be honest. She was a terrible actress anyway. "I wasn't sure if you'd come at all."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta let out a loud, audible breath. "I'm such an idiot," he said, more to himself than her, it seemed. He must've caught on to her emotional state, but he didn't run from it, the way she expected.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was the kind of thing she was used to, a man's anger at the sight of her tears. Gale would've told her to quit trying to manipulate him with her feelings. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Like she wasn't allowed to feel anything at all.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Out of the corner of her eye, she watched Peeta step closer. "Katniss?" he asked, his voice holding a question, "can you look at me?" </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She huffed, then swiped her eyes one last time before glancing up at him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Seeing Peeta again made her heart hurt a little. He was so beautiful to her, uncertain and nervous the way he was. She was glad he was there, glad he hadn't just brushed her off.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And then he opened his mouth and surprised her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I'm sorry," he told her, the words so quiet it must have been an effort for him to get them out.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She frowned at that, confused. "Why are you, sorry?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta shrugged. He ran his hand up and down the back of his neck, and she couldn't help the way her eyes went to the flex of his bicep, the way it changed the shape of his tattoo. She stepped a little closer to him, catching a whiff of that devastating cologne he wore while she watched him work through trying to find what he wanted to say. He seemed to be looking everywhere but at her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"For a lot of things," he said finally. "I'm sorry I haven't been over here this past week. I've been a real asshole."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"But you didn't do anything," Katniss said, inching closer. He was drawing her in little by little as she realized he was just as unsure about her as she had been about him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"No," he insisted, "I did a lot of things. I went next door and pouted for a solid week when I found out you weren't interested in me-"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Peeta I was-"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"And I wasn't a good friend to you because of that. It wasn't fair of me to just put my feelings on you that way." Peeta dropped his hand back to his side, making eye contact with her again. She could tell he was nervous. "My feelings about you aren't your responsibility, they're mine, and I'm sorry I behaved that way."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss felt a laugh escape before she covered her mouth with her hand to try and stop it. But still, it leaked out into the silence of the room, filling every empty corner with the sound.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta cocked an eyebrow. "What's so funny?" he asked. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss didn't answer him, simply edged closer until she was near enough to do the thing that, if she was honest with herself, she'd wanted to do since that first day when he'd stood so close behind her and teased her about the succulent.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She rested her hands on his arms, feeling the warmth of his body. She liked the sensation a lot; it seemed to wake her up from the haze of confusion she'd felt. "Did you like the flowers?" Katniss asked, staring up at him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta looked overwhelmed as he nodded, a short, jerky movement of his chin. "Yeah, of course, I did. But you shouldn't have done that," he told her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She watched his throat bob when he swallowed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You didn't do anything wrong, though. You don't owe me anything."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss chose to ignore his last statement.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"They reminded me of you," she said instead. "I missed you this last week. A lot."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You did?" </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Now it was her turn to nod. "I've gotten used to seeing you, I guess."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Me too," Peeta whispered as he tentatively moved into her like he wasn't sure what was going on between them yet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Well, she couldn't let him have any doubt now, could she? "Well, that's good," she said. "I'm glad."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss was the one who closed the distance first. Standing on the balls of her feet, she leaned in and kissed him before she could overthink it, meeting his soft lips with a tender, warm touch of hers. Being this close to him was a revelation. The warmth from his body, the way his arms briefly tensed beneath her touch before relaxing again. The way that cologne mixed with the smell of a man. She wanted to get closer, wanted to climb all over him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But she didn't. There was no reason to rush this.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta sighed. "So you wanna go out some time?" he asked, pulling away from her just far enough to ask the question.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss nodded. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta's answering smile was wide. She bit her lip in response. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"How about we get matching tattoos?" Peeta asked his tone light and his expression making it obvious he was teasing her even as he stared at her mouth. She knew the feeling- she wanted to talk to him as much as she wanted to kiss him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"No. Not yet at least," Katniss answered, surprising even herself. She'd never even entertained the idea before but now? Now she felt like a whole new world of opportunities had opened up before her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You don't have to do that," he said, all traces of humor gone. Peeta didn't know her well enough to realize that Katniss wouldn't do what she didn't want to do. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He'd find out soon enough.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You know I like you just the way you are."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I know that," she scolded him, stepping closer, "now shut up and kiss me again. We can do better things with our lips than argue."</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>I posted a since-edited version of this on Tumblr a while ago if it looks familiar.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Chapter three will be up soon, I am most of the way through it now.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“So, you ready for this?” Peeta asked, sounding distracted as he used his ‘good’ leg to push his stool back from his workstation. The words framed as if they were a chance to think about her answer for a bit before giving it. His eyes remained trained on the canvas of Delly’s right arm draped above her head, and his face was pinched in concentration as he surveyed his work.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After taking a long look at the freshly-inked skin, Peeta set his gun back on the tray before rising to his feet and leaning over his partner. He picked up a towel and used it to wipe the excess ink from her bicep’s lower curve. Beneath the cloth, which first dotted and then bloomed with extra ink, a red-headed mermaid with lowered lashes and iridescent-looking green scales stared back at her. While her breasts were bare, her face was innocent like an underwater Eve in the ocean’s Garden of Eden.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The tattoo looked nearly complete to Katniss; when she’d asked Peeta about it, he’d laughed at her question bemusedly. “I wish- this one needs at least one but more likely, two, sessions to fill in the remaining color,” he told her with a tiny smile, “and that’s after spending probably, I don’t know, maybe three hours working on it already.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She’d only felt a little embarrassed about the question. She didn’t know anything about tattooing, and neither Peeta nor Delly expected her to. She hadn’t realized how much time and patience went into something that intricate. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He was <em> good </em> at what he did, Katniss realized, unsurprised. The artistry involved in his work was impressive. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Watching him work was fascinating- it felt like she was getting to see a completely different side to him- one that wasn’t all openness and easy charm but more profound than what was on his colorful surface.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“She’s ready,” Delly answered for her when Katniss took more than a second to reply. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She stretched her arm out higher above her head like a cat, allowing Peeta the room he needed to apply the clear plastic bandage over the newly inked skin. Quickly he pressed the corners down to secure it in place before the edges of the plastic began to wrinkle and stick- the stuff he was using looked like plastic food wrap.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Don’t overthink things, Katniss. I never do,” Delly told her, tilting her body in her direction to get a better look at her, perfectly at ease with the way she’d butted into their conversation.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss genuinely laughed, something she rarely did, while Peeta bit his lip against a smirk threatening at the corners of his mouth. Delly did seem like the type of girl who’d never given more than two seconds of thought to anything. It seemed to be working for her, though, so who was she to judge? </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Life must not have knocked Delly flat on her ass enough times yet to change her attitude. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>If Katniss were smarter, she’d probably take a lesson from her. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Then again, maybe that wasn’t right- she wasn’t doing too bad herself. She couldn’t’ imagine having taken a chance on someone like Peeta even six months ago. And that had to be growth. Or maybe it was just that she was tired of never taking any chances, perhaps it was disgust with herself as much as anything. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She still wasn’t sure if a relationship with Peeta was something that would pan out or not; it was just that she was more afraid of what not giving herself a chance to try for something with him might do to her. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He terrified her; she still wasn’t convinced he wasn’t going to break her heart. Peeta made her feel things she honestly hadn’t thought about feeling since Gale, and it scared her how deep those emotions ran already with him. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The feelings he stirred in her were too much, too fast. But if anyone seemed worth the risk, it was Peeta, she’d decided.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I guess I’m ready, yeah,” Katniss said, leaning against the wall and hoping the intensity of her feelings weren’t showing on her face right now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She’d situated herself on the opposite side of his work station, far enough away to keep the space sterile but close enough to watch him work. The overall experience had been much as she’d expected, except that the portion where he used the gun to pierce Delly’s skin and inject ink into her arm left Katniss feeling queasy. She might have laughed and joked with Peeta about getting matching tattoos the other day (the day she impulsively kissed him in the back room of her flower shop- she still couldn’t believe that), but the reality was that she couldn’t ever see herself getting one. She hated needles.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After collecting all of his equipment and putting it into the cabinet to be sterilized, Peeta raised the salon chair’s back so Delly could get up. “Such a gentleman,” she teased, taking the offer of his hand. He helped her to her feet- a smooth motion with an easiness between the two of them that spoke of long years of familiarity. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She cringed a little when Peeta pulled Delly against him in a quick hug.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss bit her lip and looked away, trying not to get too caught up inside her head at the easiness between them. On the surface, it was glaringly evident that Delly seemed much better suited to Peeta than she was. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>But there’s nothing between them but friendship; she reminded herself. They tried. It didn’t work. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Delly likes girls for crying out loud.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss knew it was stupid, getting jealous of <em> Delly </em> of all people. Even she knew it wasn’t Delly that she was jealous of, it had more to do with the type of girl she represented- girls who were colorful and bold and felt good about themselves, girls who were so different than what Katniss had ever been. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>For reasons she’d never fully understood, she didn’t like the idea of men looking at her, so she never dressed in a way to draw attention to her body or wore a lot of makeup or did anything attention-grabbing. And it wasn’t like some of that didn’t appeal to her, because it did, and sometimes she grew tired of just being her plain old self. It was just wearing figure-hugging clothes and dying her hair and wearing bright makeup were things she didn’t exactly feel like she could do.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She had to get over this crushing doubt- this thing with Peeta was never going to get off the ground if she couldn’t get her insecurities under control.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Peeta certainly wasn’t going to remain interested in her if she couldn’t get a handle on things; no one would want to be in a relationship long-term with someone jealous of their friends.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em> Did she even want him long term? </em>Katniss didn’t know the right answer to that question. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>What she did know was that watching him from across the room made the deep ache inside her chest that’d been her companion since the first time she met him spread outward. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He was the kind of guy she should give a chance to become long-term. </p>
<p> </p>
<p><em> What the hell, Katniss </em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She was probably just over-thinking things again, the same as she’d over-thought the flower bouquet she’d left. The flowers were starting to look a little less fresh around the edges, and a few of the wilting blooms removed, but there it sat on their counter still, a bold testament to the monumental occasion when Katniss Everdeen let her guard down for a man. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Peeta’d taken the card out, she noticed. She wondered what he’d done with it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss looked up, catching his eye after what she realized had been a long time of being lost in her thoughts.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Peeta had been watching her for a while, she realized, his eyes never drifting from her face as Delly stepped from him. There was affection between the two of them, but she couldn’t deny that the look of interest on his face was on her, not his partner. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Her heart clutched a little inside her chest. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Just give me a few minutes to finish cleaning up, and then we’ll head out?” Peeta asked, breaking the silence that Katniss couldn’t’ find a way to jar herself. That tension between them was delicious.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He moved towards her once Delly left the room to shut off the lights and lock up the shop on her way out the front door. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Peeta’s expression was warm, his eyes searching and curious. He always managed to have this look on his face when they were alone as if he couldn’t wait to unwrap each of the mysteries that made up <em> her </em>. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She was more than a little afraid he was going to be disappointed by what he found once he pulled the cover off. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>But she was working on it, that fear. She was trying to get over that urge to let her insecurities keep people at a distance. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Baby steps, Katniss figured, like the flowers she’d left for him and the note she’d stuck inside of the arrangement that had said- <em>I’m sorry. I</em> <em>miss</em> <em>you</em>.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey,” Peeta said softly, smiling down at her as he took her hands.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey,” she replied, letting the corners of her mouth drift up despite her traitorous nerves. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Peeta did that to her. He had some magic ability to draw her out of her head with his gentle charm. Everything about him was that way, fluid and easy. Everything about him was natural, despite covering his body in art or the bottom half of his left leg, which was man-made. </p>
<p>He was a gentle force of life- a warm spring shower or the first snowfall of winter when you’re safe inside your own home looking out onto the world.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss felt like kicking herself as she took him in- bright and beautiful like those colorful birds and flowers tattooed on his forearm. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Peeta’s smile was devastating. His eyes even sparkled like damn sapphires or something, and she had the ridiculous thought that she was a little brown bird, a sparrow, or a starling, who’s mistakenly allowed inside of a tropical conservatory but is sure to get the boot any minute.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em> You need to stop with all of this flowery nonsense </em>; Katniss told herself as her eyes dropped from his gaze against her will. Her feelings were overwhelming right now; she was a mess; she couldn’t even look at him. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Peeta dipped his head, nuzzling the side of her cheek. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>When she looked back up and caught his eye, he leaned in and kissed her, stealing her breath.</p>
<p>It was a soft brushing of his lips, gentle pressure but powerful enough to suck thoughts of shored-up defenses out of her. Tendrils of warmth flowed through her veins; her toes tingled inside her shoes. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>His presence may as well have been an armed robber because she felt assaulted by him, that smell of skin and sandalwood and musk- that one that’d driven her to distraction since the first time he’d stopped by the flower shop. She stretched on her toes, seeking a closer connection to him. Katniss heard herself sigh against his lips when he met them with his.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>How embarrassing. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Did I tell you I’m so glad we’re doing this tonight?” He whispered against her mouth, his thumb brushing her cheek as he spoke.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He <em>took</em> a step back to look at her, smiling widely, his eyes crinkling up in the corners. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>As crazy as it was, he did seem happy with plain old her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Wow, he does like me, Katniss realized.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She shook her head because it made her nervous, having him stare at her that way. “Not in so many words, no. But I’m glad too,” she admitted a little shakily.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah?” Peeta prodded.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss nodded.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So why don’t we get out of here then?”</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>“So, where are we going?” Katniss asked, ducking her head and slipping out the back door while Peeta held it open for her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I thought we’d go somewhere downtown. Have you been to <em>The</em> <em>Landing</em> <em>Spot</em> yet?” he said, naming a casual dining place that had opened just a few months ago. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Panem was currently in the middle of a downtown boom, with many shops, like Peeta and Delly’s place, moving in over the last few months side-by-side with new restaurants and bars into the old buildings. The flood of new businesses so far seemed to be good for everyone involved.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The new hang-out spots were a great addition to the community, if you liked to socialize, which Katniss used to enjoy on a small scale. It’s just that it’d been a while- she hadn’t realized how much she’d lost the desire to go out until she found herself very much looking forward to doing so with Peeta tonight. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>But, that’s a lot of what going out with Peeta meant, waking up and letting herself live again- taking chances and choosing to grow instead of staying in her self-imposed period of stagnancy.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No, I haven’t. I haven’t been going out much lately,” Katniss admitted quietly, embarrassed by the truth. Why was he interested in her? She wasn’t exactly a ray of sunshine. “Just with running the shop, I’ve been tired in the evenings. But, I’m ready to expand my horizons again, or something like that.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He lifted their joined hands, kissing her knuckles. His ease with physical closeness was still an adjustment- she wasn’t usually such a touchy person, but she enjoyed Peeta’s affection, she could admit to herself. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Good,” he said, ”I’m glad I’m part of your expansion plan.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss smiled at his words. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Peeta was so easy to be with, even before she’d decided it was safe to let her guard down with him. He was so kind and made her feel so comfortable; spending time with him was just this odd combination of contentment and insane attraction to someone who seemed entirely wrong for you in the first place.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>But they liked each other, so they were doing this.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They slowed down when they reached his Jeep backed into one of the parking spots behind the tattoo parlor. Peeta gestured toward it. “I wasn’t sure if you’d want to drive or walk.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss’s eyes went to his prosthetic, quickly, guiltily almost, before shrugging. “It’s a nice night,” she said, assuming that if he’d offered to walk, then he was probably physically able to do it, ”Let’s walk.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading, I love to hear from you guys so leave a comment if you are feeling it. I have everything in place to finish this one soon!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I did a little light editing on 10/08- I pushed both this chapter and four out more quickly than I typically would, so I went in and fixed a few things—nothing major or plot-altering :).</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"This is a nice place," Katniss said, sliding into her seat. "It was a good pick."</p><p> </p><p>Peeta pushed her chair in before going around to his seat at the small table.</p><p> </p><p>When they arrived a few minutes ago, the hostess led them to this intimately-sized table near the restaurant's front. They were seated next to the street-view window in a corner Katniss was sure must've required a reservation based on every table looking filled tonight. The corner where they were seated sheltered them from prying eyes, but you could still watch the people and traffic moving past on the street. </p><p> </p><p>Not only was the table great, but the atmosphere of the restaurant had a warm, comfortable feel in a palate of dark, muted colors, and what she thought were reclaimed woods, comfortable cushions, and low lights.</p><p> </p><p>"Have you been here before?" Katniss asked, catching Peeta's eye once she'd finished admiring her surroundings. </p><p> </p><p>Her face warmed a little, realizing he'd been studying her the entire time she'd spent looking around. She wasn't sure if he'd been trying to get her impression of the restaurant, or just looking at her; either made her feel special. "No, but I've heard good things about it," he said after a moment. </p><p> </p><p>The attention he paid her enveloped her like a blanket- Peeta's gaze always left her warm and slightly nervous, but that was pretty much how she always felt with him. "I don't know if I've told you this yet, but you look great tonight," he added, his eyes raking over her almost imperceptibly. </p><p> </p><p>"Thanks- you do too," Katniss answered, glad she'd decided to go with the dress Prim pressed her into wearing. </p><p> </p><p>The waiter came and took their drink orders, and after dropping them off, left again. Silence fell over the table, and Katniss was just starting to feel anxiety eating at her again when Peeta spoke up. "You know, you've never asked me about my leg," he mentioned, taking a sip of his beer. His eyes appraised Katnsis over the glass's rim; he seemed genuinely puzzled. "It just seems like something that would've come up in all the times we've talked."</p><p> </p><p>She quickly swallowed down her mouthful of wine, surprised. Peeta was just... who said things like that, honestly? Setting her glass down, she weighed the seriousness of the question-reasonably sure Peeta was messing with her, but she couldn't always tell with him. Of course, she'd wondered what had led to his amputation. It was only natural to be curious, but she hadn't asked him about it. That kind of information seemed like something you waited for the other person to volunteer. She finally settled on her first assumption that he was teasing her because his face was too bland for a serious question. It was almost like he was over schooling his features and trying not to laugh. </p><p> </p><p>With that in mind, there was an edge of humor to her voice when she asked- "Peeta, would you like me to ask?"</p><p> </p><p>He raised his eyebrows at her expectantly and leaned across the table, propping his elbows there. He steepled his fingers together and rested his chin on them, all the while smiling at her disarmingly. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss couldn't help but stare- his biceps strained against his shirtsleeves with his arms poised on the table that way. His forearms flexed, his inked skin tight over the muscles beneath. Her mind went back to what it was like to lean against his hard chest and have those strong arms around her; how soft his lips were when they kissed. <em>I wonder what he looks like shirtless; </em>Katniss asked herself, caught up in her thoughts. Her eyes drifted across his body, entirely distracted from the conversation at hand. It certainly wasn't the first time it'd happened, but this time no nerves were attached to her little mental diversion- just curiosity.</p><p> </p><p>"I would like you to ask me, yes," Peeta told her, drawing her back into their conversation. He grinned, dropping his arms to his sides again. "I think it's time for me to share my tragic backstory," he continued.</p><p> </p><p>"Like the villain in a movie?"</p><p> </p><p>"Exactly like that, yes," he said. "It's a very morally-ambiguous tale."</p><p> </p><p>"Seriously?"</p><p> </p><p>Peeta grinned. "No, not at all."</p><p> </p><p>"Smartass," she said, laughing despite herself.</p><p> </p><p>"Always." When he tilted his head to the side and let a lock of that wavy hair fall across his eye, Katniss sucked in her breath. </p><p> </p><p>She glanced up at the ceiling to collect herself before looking at him again. Why did he have to be so attractive? God, it was impossible to have a rational thought inside her head when he stared at her that way. But a weird sense of euphoria was overtaking her, and her typical reservations were starting to fall off. "So- are you going to tell me what happened to your leg or what?"</p><p> </p><p>He smirked. "I thought you'd never ask."</p><p> </p><p>Katniss rolled her eyes at him but couldn't disguise her laughter. Did he have to be so funny too?</p><p> </p><p>"Believe it or not, I lost my leg in a farming accident."</p><p> </p><p>What- he had to be lying! With his surfer/skater/biker/whatever in the hell kind of vibe he was giving off persona- he could not have lost his leg in a damn <em> farming </em> accident. "That's bullshit," she said bluntly, "are you going to tell me a horse stepped on your leg or something?"</p><p> </p><p>Peeta set his glass back down on the table, eyes wide. He looked like he was trying not to laugh. "I'm not lying, I swear!"</p><p> </p><p>She frowned. "What happened then?" she asked.</p><p> </p><p>He glanced around the room before leaning towards her and lowering his voice conspiratorially. "Scoot your chair closer to mine, and I'll tell you."</p><p> </p><p>Katniss sighed. She knew he was still goading her, but she gripped her chair's seat and shifted it towards him as unobtrusively as possible anyway while Peeta did the same. "Why did you want us to move?" she asked once they'd resettled on the same edge of the table. She looked up at Peeta, much closer to her than she'd anticipated he would be; it took her back a little.</p><p> </p><p>"So I could do this," he said. Carelessly, Peeta stroked her jaw with his finger's tip, letting his eyes drop to her lips. He leaned in quickly and, without giving her a chance to protest, tipped her chin up, kissing her tenderly on the lips. He lingered against her mouth longer than seemed reasonable, considering where they were. His kiss was heady and overwhelming; innocent as it was on the surface, his lips made Katniss feel like she was sinking. "I missed you way over there," Peeta whispered in explanation after. A flush burned across her face. He dropped his hand and sat back, so she did too, embarrassed by her love-sick reaction to him.</p><p> </p><p>Quickly though, he redirected the conversation by talking about the accident, sparing her the embarrassment. "My grandpa on my mom's side of the family was a farmer. He had a few cows and chickens and some land. When I was a teenager, we used to help him at harvest time; my brothers and I took turns driving his tractors between the fields when Grandpa took crops off. One day we were unloading the wagon into the bin when my brother Rye and I started horsing around." He paused and shook his head at his younger self. "It was such a stupid accident- I was acting like a dumbass that day. I don't know what got into me, showing off like that, but I slipped while climbing up the equipment, which I should not have been doing in the first place, and fell. My leg got sucked into a running grain auger."</p><p> </p><p>Oh my <em>god</em>, that sounded horrific. "Was there any chance to save-" Katniss began, tentatively. She didn't know anything about farm equipment, but that sounded awful. She tried not to visualize the scene- her weak stomach might not take it.</p><p> </p><p>"No. I ah, went into shock, so I don't remember much, but my brother said my leg looked like hamburger."</p><p> </p><p>That did it. Katniss felt her stomach lurch. She covered her mouth with her hand, bile rising in her throat.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta's gaze landed on her then. He must've noticed her pale visibly because his expression was instantly apologetic. "Oh damn, I wasn't thinking- it's been so long ago now that I don't even think about how gory it was anymore. Are you okay?" Peeta asked, his eyes scanning her face. He looked ready to kick himself.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss shook her head, embarrassed at her dramatic reaction to a story. "No- no. It's not your fault- I just have kind of a weak stomach," she admitted, "I should've told you that."</p><p> </p><p>He exhaled loudly. "So maybe we should save these kinds of conversations for later?"</p><p> </p><p>"After dinner would probably be better, yeah." Katniss reached for her glass of water. She swallowed a drink, letting it quell her nausea a bit. "But it's fine, Peeta- I'm not the one who lost my leg," she reassured him. She didn't want him fussing over her while he was in the middle of relaying the details of a life-altering accident. That was ridiculous.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta shrugged, shifting in his seat a bit. "It was a long time ago now."</p><p> </p><p>"You were fourteen, though- that had to have been hard."</p><p> </p><p>"It was bad- I certainly wouldn't wish it on anyone," he seemed lost in thought for a moment, but then laughed. "It's weird, though; I'd have to say that accident led me to where I'm at in my life now. I don't see this version of me existing without the accident."</p><p> </p><p>"What do you mean?" She asked, leaning closer.</p><p> </p><p>"It's something I've thought a lot about, some self-reassurance when I miss having my leg or I'm feeling sorry for myself. The accident took away all of the things I'd been hiding behind. It was like I didn't have to give much thought to who I was or what I was passionate about until after. Before then, I was heavily involved in sports. My dad was a state champ wrestler, and football player both, and my brothers and I just did the same. Everyone expected it from us. Not to say I didn't like it; I did, it just took a lot of energy to meet the expectations heaped on me, and it didn't leave a lot of time to daydream or use my imagination. I'm sure I wouldn't have gone to art school- Dad was pushing me towards a sports scholarship."</p><p> </p><p>"So, you were a jock," she said.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta shrugged at the label. "Sports were everything in my house. Everything. But then the accident happened, and my hobbies were gone. I had nothing to do with myself. So I turned to art. Later, of course, after a shit-ton of physical therapy and my prosthesis, I picked some sports back up, but it took a long time-"</p><p> </p><p>"Like what?" Katniss broke in, "I just don't know what you do in your free time, I guess. You've never really said."</p><p> </p><p>Peeta ran his finger through the condensation on his glass. "Nothing too exciting- pretty basic stuff. I like to bake; I do a lot of painting and sketching- I create all the designs I use in my shop. I weight train; I play golf-"</p><p> </p><p>"Golf, here in Panem?" she asked.</p><p> </p><p>"Yep."</p><p> </p><p>Katniss couldn't help but laugh at the visual of him at the stuffy course frequented by rich old men and women. "You must stand out like a sore thumb."</p><p> </p><p>"Believe it or not, they let my buddy Finnick and me onto the course the first time with no fuss at all. Of course, I wore a long sleeve shirt, so most of my tattoos weren't visible. After that, they couldn't ask me to leave, so I showed up the next week in short sleeves with blue hair."</p><p> </p><p>"That's amazing," Katniss said, covering her smile with her hand. She didn't want people staring at them, but that was <em>funny</em>. "I would have paid handsomely to have been there for that."</p><p> </p><p>"Handsomely?" Peeta cocked his eyebrow.</p><p> </p><p>"I said what I said. Handsomely."</p><p> </p><p>He took another sip of his beer, and when the waiter approached again, they both requested a refill on their drinks after giving him their respective dinner orders. Once he was gone, Peeta finished his golf story. "The look on their faces when I walked out on the course was just extreme disapproval, you know? Until I made a birdie on the first hole, that is. The old farts were pretty quiet after that. I guess I had to show them I wasn't just some punk kid. I mean, I am a punk kid, of course, but one who can kick most of their asses," he paused, grimacing into his glass like something sour was in his mouth. "Now I sound like an egotistical asshole. Sorry."</p><p> </p><p>"No, you're not- I asked!" Katniss knew she was smiling too broadly at him, but she couldn't help it. She liked it when he shared things about himself- he was so different from her, so much more open. "I've never been golfing. Is it hard to pick up?"</p><p> </p><p>"It's not too bad, I'll take you some time- it'll be fun," Peeta said, his tone easy like <em>next</em> <em>time</em> was inevitable.</p><p> </p><p>Modern convention told Katniss she should be mildly insulted or something. She'd never liked presumptuous men; however, she liked the confidence when it was Peeta. It was reassuring that he was into her as much as she was him since she was terrible at talking about her feelings. <em>That's what the flowers and all that kissing was about, remember? </em>She reminded herself. <em>He</em> <em>knows you like him. Stop overthinking things. </em></p><p> </p><p>Peeta abruptly drew her out of her wandering thoughts with his next statement, tuning her back into the conversation at the wrong time. "So anyway," he casually said as if it wasn't creating a horrible visual, "like I was saying after the meat grinder got through with my leg-"</p><p> </p><p>Katniss glared at him; his words didn't make her feel instantly sick like the first time he'd joked about the accident, but still. He was going to get smacked (or thrown up on) if he didn't stop.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta grinned. "What? You looked like you'd wandered off on me there. Just checking to see if you were paying attention or not. You are, so congratulations."</p><p> </p><p>She groaned. "Oh god, you're the worst!"</p><p> </p><p>He laughed.</p><p> </p><p>"You're just lucky I have a drink in my system now, or you'd be sorry," she continued. "Now, how about if you quit with the shock value and just go on with your story?"</p><p> </p><p>Peeta reached for her hand again after a significant pause; times like these, she wished she could peek inside his mind. "You are so damn cute; you know that, Katniss? I like it when you get all aggressive with me," he said, looking at her intently.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss laughed nervously. "What?" </p><p> </p><p>He leaned forward and whispered in her ear. His breath was warm on her neck; it made her shiver. "It's a huge turn-on."</p><p> </p><p>Her eyes went wide. She thought her face was hot before? That was nothing compared to right now.</p><p> </p><p>"Is it alright if I say things like that to you?"</p><p> </p><p>Damn him. Katniss nodded, and she couldn't help it when her eyes caught his for just a second before darting away.</p><p> </p><p>"It is? Good." Peeta pushed a lock of hair behind her ear, his eyes following his hand's motion. It startled her a little, but it didn't scare her. Fear wasn't what sent her blood racing through her veins."You'd tell me if I come on too strong, right?" he asked, his voice low, "I don't want to scare you off or anything. It's just that I want to touch you all the time. For one thing, your skin is so soft," He traced his finger across the thin ridges of the underside of her wrist, watching the path he took, "it's like silk."</p><p> </p><p>Her skin erupted in a thousand goosebumps. She couldn't breathe, sitting still, waiting for what Peeta would do next.</p><p> </p><p>"But if you want me to back off a little, I will," he promised, looking her in the eye.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss's heart thumped wildly inside her chest, but she shook her head. "I like it," she admitted shyly. Somehow she managed to get the rest of the words out although her throat felt paralyzed; it physically pained her to say what she wanted to say, her nerves warring the way they were. "I like it when you touch me. I like the crazy things you say."</p><p> </p><p>Peeta's breath came out in a rush. "Good," he told her softly, his eyes never straying from hers.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Katniss could feel herself stumbling a little as they approached the shared lot behind their businesses. It was dark, and so late, the streetlights had been out for a while. She was tired but so light and happy she didn't care. Maybe delirium had set in even. Let it- she couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so free.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta pulled her close and kissed her, much like he had many times throughout the evening. He'd meant what he said about wanting to touch her; she hadn't gone without his hands somewhere on her body the remainder of the evening. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss sighed, pressing against him as their kiss deepened. They'd lingered over their dinner, holding up the table much longer than they probably should have. Many people left, and new ones came in to take their places while remaining in their seats. Neither seemed in a hurry to go- they simply were enjoying each other's company too much. </p><p> </p><p>Finally, around ten, Peeta suggested they leave and go to a club downtown that was having live music tonight. So they left, walking down the street hand in hand, under the lamplight and past dark storefronts to the corner club. Once there, they settled in and ordered another drink. As the night wore on into the early morning, Katniss found herself becoming more and more comfortable with his attention. The drinks probably helped bolster her confidence, but eventually, right around when the band began playing a cover of a <em> Journey </em> song, she found herself leading him away to one of the back corners of the club. Once there, she leaned into Peeta and kissed him thoughtlessly, her hands in his hair while he held her close against his firm chest. </p><p> </p><p>The kissing had been fun, with a distinct heat behind it, but mostly he kept his hands in respectable places, and she'd stopped before things got too intense. Peeta didn't protest when she finally pulled away. "God, you're fantastic," was all he said, his eyes heavy in the low light of the club. Katniss told him he was beautiful, or something dumb like that, and they'd gotten into a small argument, bickering back and forth about who the beautiful one was, until they were holding each other up, laughing. And then they'd kissed some more. </p><p> </p><p>Kissing Peeta was her new favorite thing to do, hands down.</p><p> </p><p>In the dark behind the tattoo parlor and the flower shop, she couldn't see him very well, but the way his eyes turned up in the corners told her he was happy. "Are you alright to get home?" He asked, looking down where he held her in the circle of his arms </p><p> </p><p>For half a second before answering, Katniss debated whether to ask Peeta to come home with her tonight or not. Ultimately, she decided she didn't feel ready for that, so she didn't. There wasn't any hurry, and the anticipation was sweet. "Yeah, it's just around the corner from here. How about you?"</p><p> </p><p>"I'm alright," he reassured her, letting her go. He held the car door open for her while she climbed inside it. "See you soon?" he asked.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss bit her lip and nodded. "Yeah, I'd like that."</p><p> </p><p>Peeta shut her door, and she stuck her head out the window to kiss him one last time before backing out of her spot and driving home.</p><p><br/>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I went in on 10/8 and did a little editing- nothing plot altering; I just got this one out quicker than I typically would and decided to go back in and make a few alterations.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Katniss wriggled on the bed, trying to remain still and quiet despite the myriad of things Peeta was doing to her under the sheet. He ran his lips over her stomach, trailing kisses down her thighs, his breath hot and damp on her sensitive skin. When his tongue darted out along the seam where her thigh and pelvis met, she almost lost it. Peeta had teased her last night about how loud she was being, something along the lines of the neighbors sliding anonymous notes beneath her front door to complain. That comment sealed her resolve; she wasn't going to make a peep, no matter how many times he'd insisted he was joking.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss slapped a hand over her mouth as Peeta sucked on the sensitive skin of her inner thigh, barely managing to stifle the noise that hit somewhere between a giggle and a moan. And then she couldn't- gasping when his breath wafted across her most sensitive spot. His mouth came to a halt near the mole on the inside of her upper thigh- the one, coincidentally, he'd told her he spent days thinking about after their first time together. There was a slight movement under the sheet, and then Peeta poked his head out from underneath it, giving her a view of his rumpled hair and early-morning eyes from between her legs. He sat the rest of the way up, allowing the sheet to fall around his hips. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss held her breath as Peeta leaned over her. He moved, his legs and hips and half-erect cock brushing against her skin as he made his way up her body. Once they were face to face, he braced himself on his forearms, hovering over her. A shiver wracked her, goosebumps littering her skin from her heightened awareness of him and the temperature in the room. The air around them was brisk, but she would've been even colder if it hadn't been for the heat from Peeta's body. It was only fair he should keep her warm- he was the one who insisted on leaving the window open every night. </p><p> </p><p>His eyes dropped to her pebbled breasts, and he took a long, leisurely look that made her bite back a smile at his appreciation of her. "Did I hear you clear under there?" He asked, finally meeting her eyes again. "I thought you were going to stay quiet this time."</p><p> </p><p>Anticipation made her toes curl into the sheets from his teasing. "Never," Katniss whispered, "my lips are sealed." </p><p> </p><p>Warmth flooded her body both from his nearness and his absolute focus on her. It drove any hint of the previous chill away. </p><p> </p><p>He dropped his lips next to her ear. His breath was warm on her neck, and his words silky, "Na-ah; you're weak. I hadn't even gotten to the good part yet, and you still couldn't keep quiet." </p><p> </p><p>Katniss couldn't tear her eyes away when Peeta lifted his head again and smirked down at her. The sun was streaming in through the window behind him then, illuminating the outlines of his handsome face and hard body, giving him the appearance of a fallen angel ready to steal her soul away. That wasn't fair at all, she decided. He didn't need help from mother nature luring her in. She didn't need the reminder to count her lucky stars, as terrifyingly gorgeous and vibrant as Peeta was, and as devastating as he'd proven to her defenses, she was happy. Happier than she'd ever been. She just didn't let herself think about all the things that could go wrong, at least not very often. Certainly not now.</p><p> </p><p>Laying still beneath him, she moved her hand to press her palm flat against his bicep, giving in to her ever-present urge to touch him. She ran it across his shoulder, where tattooed leaves and vines wrapped around and flowed further down his sides. Although she couldn't see them now, she knew the colors spread around to his lower back as well. When Peeta had stripped down in front of her the first time they had sex months ago, it had surprised her to see how much of his skin was un-decorated. His legs and chest were mostly bare, other than the few trailing vines that crossed into the outer edges of his pecs; they went further down, snaking around his thighs and ass too. There was still a lot of open canvas on his skin.</p><p> </p><p>"Katniss," he whispered, interrupting her thoughts, "did I lose you again? I never know where you've gone when you get that look on your face."</p><p> </p><p>She tore her eyes away from the contrast of her olive skin against his fair shoulder, glad he couldn't read her thoughts. She shrugged, letting her hand drop to her chest and purposely covering her breasts, obscuring his view. His eyes darkened at the challenge, and her stomach fluttered in response. She liked to tease him just as much as he did her, although she never could quite understand how she had such a pull on him. </p><p> </p><p>Peeta moved, gracefully for such a large man, shifting first one leg and then the other over her hips until he was straddling her thighs. He then took her wrists in hand, easing them over her head and pinning her arms in place. It raised her upper body, arching her back, but gently. There was no force used, just a manipulation of her limbs.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss was a more than willing participant. He was so much bigger than her, even with his amputated leg, she couldn't get away if she tried. Of course, that was a useless thought, because there was nowhere else she wanted to be. She contentedly sighed as he arranged her arms to his liking, enjoying the ease they shared in expressing themselves like this. It made her feel free- she could just drop her emotional baggage off and leave it at the door. Kick it to the side. The funny thing was that what Peeta was doing now wasn't even an entirely sexual thing; he just enjoyed looking at her. The heart of this thing with him was he made her feel she was worth being admired when they were together- beautiful and desirable, not so much a mess of a girl. </p><p> </p><p>Peeta put his weight on the arm he wasn't holding her wrists with, lowering himself until his chest just hovered over her, his body brushing against her in a teasing way. "You were laughing. What was so funny?" He asked, smiling at her.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss shook her head. "Not a thing," she insisted, knowing her tone gave her away but not caring anymore.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta chuckled, but mid-laugh, his eyes dropped to her lips, and he ducked his head to kiss her. When her mouth opened beneath his, he released her wrists. Her fingers reflexively curled inward, heady with the sensation of being surrounded by him. He grazed a soft path down the sensitive inner curve of her arm; his touch made her feel half-ticklish, half-crazy with want. Katniss arched up toward him instinctively. He moved across her skin, trailing a path along the line of her collar bone before finally cupping her breast in his warm hand. She closed her eyes, gasping into his mouth. Peeta lowered himself to rest on top of her, his chest pressing into her soft breasts. Her arms slid underneath his and around his back as they kissed.</p><p> </p><p>He'd just begun to make a path down her body when a tell-tale buzz of an incoming call came from his phone on her nightstand. "Ignore it," Peeta mumbled into her skin.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss let out a shaky breath, watching his eyes flutter closed as he licked a wet circle around her nipple before sucking it into his mouth. She was more than happy to let the phone go.</p><p> </p><p>And she ignored it, pretty effectively, for a few minutes at least. But when Peeta's face was down around her navel, and he'd settled between her spread thighs again, the phone pinged with a voice mail. It immediately began buzzing again, dammit. </p><p> </p><p>He peered up at her, looking put out. "I should probably check that?" </p><p> </p><p>"It could be something important," she agreed, sitting up on her arms to try and get a look at his screen.</p><p> </p><p>When Peeta got up, Katniss leaned against the headboard, moving her legs out of his way. She grabbed the sheet to cover herself as he shifted towards the edge of the bed and grabbed his phone. "Rye?" he answered, running a hand through his hair. He froze and turned his head to the side. "What? Say that again-"</p><p> </p><p>A long stretch of silence from her boyfriend followed- it seemed like his brother was relaying the details of something over the phone because Peeta sat stone-still, before slumping forward. "No shit," he whispered. Rye went on talking until Peeta interrupted him. "Where is Dad now, though?" He glanced over his shoulder, reaching for Katniss's hand. "Yeah, don't worry. I'll be there, no, don't- Rye, I'll be quick. I just have to let Dels know she needs to cover the shop for me for a few days, and then I'll head out, alright? Mercy Hospital- got it. Call me if anything changes. Tell him I love him, would you? Thanks- I'll be there soon."</p><p> </p><p>"What's going on?" Katniss asked as he hung up on his brother.</p><p> </p><p>"They think my dad had a heart attack," Peeta said, setting the phone aside. His face took on a look of concentration as he reached for the silicone sleeve he used to cover his leg before attaching his prosthetic. "He was on his way to take my nephew to his soccer game when he collapsed."</p><p> </p><p>"How is he?" She asked, leaning forward and placing her hand on his back.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta paused what he was doing and ran a hand through his hair. "Not great, I guess, but it could be worse. He's awake, at least. Rye didn't give me a bunch of details- I just know he's in the ICU." He rolled the sleeve up to his thigh, and then leaning over, grabbed his prosthetic propped against the nightstand. He slid the connecting end over his knee and snapped the pin to lock it in place.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss slid out of bed behind him. She wasn't sure what she could do to help, but getting dressed was probably a good first step. He would probably head right out of town to see his dad- maybe he would want some coffee to take with him. She could get some started for him.</p><p> </p><p>"Sorry for the interruption," Peeta said softly, grasping her hand in his as she moved past him. He ran his eyes over her body, looking regretful.</p><p> </p><p>She shook her head, "I'll live, don't worry about me."</p><p> </p><p>"But I might not." He brushed a kiss across her knuckles. "I'll make it up to you later," he promised, his eyes mischievous.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss shook her head- he must not be too worried about his dad. More likely, though, he was just distracting himself. "You're ridiculous." She tried to step back and make room for Peeta to stand. It'd be easier to do if he would let go of her hand, but he wouldn't. "I don't think we're keeping score. Besides, if we were, I think you're way ahead of me anyway," Katniss told him, embarrassed to have to say it out loud. Intimacy was hard- talking about sex didn't come as effortlessly to her as it did him.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta laughed as he bent over to grab his pants off the floor, still holding her hand like he didn't want to let go of it yet. "That's how it's supposed to be. Hey, can I ask you something?" She nodded, and he sat back down on the bed, tossing his clothes down before taking both of her hands, his expression hesitant. "Would you come with me? I mean, I know you and I were planning to spend the weekend together already, so-"</p><p> </p><p>"You want me to go with you to see your dad?"</p><p> </p><p>Peeta nodded. "And my family," at what must have been a confused look on her face, he squeezed her hands. "I know you haven't met them yet. If it makes you uncomfortable, or it's too soon, you can say no-"</p><p> </p><p>"It's not that, it's just- <em> this </em> weekend," Katniss scrambled to think of something to say, "are you sure?" She wasn't confident going home with Peeta while his dad was in the hospital was the best time to meet his family. The idea made her nervous, even though a larger part of her was glad he wanted her to meet them. They'd had dinner with her mom and Prim about a month after they'd begun seeing each other, but her mom was only on the other side of town, while his family was about a three-hour drive away. Three hours away seemed like a big deal. Did this mean they were moving into something more serious? The way Katniss felt was serious. She was pretty sure, as much as she hated to admit because it scared her, she was in love with Peeta already. </p><p> </p><p>It was on the tip of her tongue to say no, to put some distance between them now with the way her chest felt tight, but the look on Peeta's face made the words stick in the back of her throat. He seemed so anxious, waiting for her reply that she couldn't say it. If he needed her, then she would go.</p><p> </p><p>"Okay," Katniss said, "yes."</p><p> </p><p>Peeta's face lit up, and he pulled her into his arms, wrapping them around her waist and laying his head on her bare breasts. He sighed contentedly before turning his head and pressing his lips to her sternum, breathing her in. "Thank you," he mumbled.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss shrugged and glanced away. "It's fine. I'm glad you asked. I would've missed you too," she admitted, the words difficult to get out as he finally let her slip from his arms.</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah?" he said, smiling up at her.</p><p> </p><p>She gave a jerky nod. Why was it so hard for her to say this sort of thing? "Yeah."</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Katniss closed the bathroom door behind her, needing a few minutes to herself to process what was happening. She would be meeting his family for the first time, and it wasn't happening in the middle of the most comfortable circumstances. Life was like that sometimes, not ideal. She was used to it, though- things were almost always that way for her. But this wasn't about her; it was about Peeta and what he needed.</p><p> </p><p>After turning the shower on, she sat on the toilet. She reached for the toilet paper, and after emptying her bladder, wiped. It surprised her when she glanced at the toilet paper to see a smear of light pink blood across it. She was so bad about keeping track of her periods; it was always a surprise when they showed up. She knew she needed to be more careful about keeping track of her cycles now that she was having regular sex again. It'd been a few years since she'd dated anyone before Peeta, and she'd let her birth control lapse during her long period of celibacy. The two of them were using condoms for now. She needed to go back to the doctor and get on the pill again- it'd be nice to go without the condoms, not to mention she knew they had a higher rate of failure. </p><p> </p><p>"I'll schedule an appointment for next week," she told herself as she stepped into the shower. No rush now.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>When they arrived at the hospital around noon, Peeta did quick work introducing Katniss to his brothers."This is my girlfriend," he said, a hint of pride in his voice that made her smile, "I know you guys are tired of hearing me talk about her all the time; now you can finally say you've met her."</p><p> </p><p>"It's a pleasure Katniss," Rye, his middle brother, held out his hand first.</p><p> </p><p>Quickly, she assessed him. Superficially, Rye looked a lot like Peeta, but more as a picture of what her boyfriend could have been if he'd taken a more traditional path in life, other than becoming a tattoo artist. He had neatly trimmed blond hair and the same muscular build as his brother underneath a Nebraska Cornhuskers polo and a pair of well-fitting jeans. He was a boring, duller version of Peeta, she decided. Something about him just seemed <em>less</em>. He was standoffish, though not offensively so. Colder. </p><p> </p><p>She bit back a grin at her mental comparison, while Rye smiled politely at her. </p><p> </p><p>His oldest brother Phil was much different, taller and blonder than his brothers with a crooked nose and a lankier body. There was nothing standoffish about him; he swooped in to lift her in a hug. It caught Katniss off-guard- she wasn't really a hugger. "I'm so glad we're finally getting to meet you, Katniss. Peet hasn't shut up since you two starting seeing each other. And I have to say," Phil leaned back and smiled at her warmly, "what he said doesn't do you justice."</p><p> </p><p>"Phil," Peeta said warningly, putting his arm around Katniss and pulling her against his chest, sensing her apprehension at his brother's antics, "ease up."</p><p> </p><p>"Sorry," Phil answered.</p><p> </p><p>He stuffed his hands deep in his pockets, and Katniss had to laugh. It was like he was putting himself in a time out. "It's fine," she told them both, sincerely.</p><p> </p><p>They talked about their father's condition for a few more minutes, catching Peeta up on everything that had happened so far. The blood work results weren't back yet, but the doctor believed he'd suffered a minor heart attack. He was stable and would probably get moved to one of the patient wings soon. They wouldn't know more until more tests were run, but Peeta breathed an audible sigh of relief when Rye told him their dad was awake and seemed comfortable. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss offered to stay in the waiting room while Peeta and his brothers went back to see his father for a while, and then the two of them would go from there in regards to what they would do for the afternoon. He mentioned something about her taking his Jeep to his dad's house later, and that seemed for the best. She was happy to stay for a while but didn't think she could add much just sitting around the hospital for Peeta to worry about all day. Maybe she could find something useful to do at the house while everyone else was here- and besides, if she were in his dad's place, she wouldn't want someone she didn't know spending the whole day in her room. That would be her worst nightmare.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss sat down in a waiting room chair and picked up a magazine to flip through once Peeta and his brothers left her alone to see their father. She spent a few minutes catching up on celebrity gossip she didn't care much about but was at least entertaining, and then some beauty tips she probably wouldn't remember. Glanced over the edge of the magazine at the sound of click-clacking shoes, she watched a tall, broad-shouldered, late fifties-ish blond woman stalk past the waiting room door, moving further down the hall towards the ICU. She quickly did a double-take at the woman- it had to be Peeta's mother.</p><p> </p><p>His parents were divorced, though, so what was she doing here? A voice, authoritative and demanding, floated down the hall a moment later. Yep, that had to be her. Katniss bit back a grin, thinking of how Peeta once described his mother as having "brass balls"; honestly, the words had felt pretty complimentary.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss set her magazine down and stood, her curiosity stoked. She headed toward the magazine rack across the room as a cover, stopping next to the door and sticking her head out far enough to hear what his mom was saying to the staff sitting at the nurse's station. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> "-but that is my husband down there, and I need to see him-" </em>
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  <em> "-ma'am, Mr. Mellark has the maximum number of visitors in his room right now, we need you to wait-" </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Peeta's mother caught her off guard when she glanced down the hall suddenly. The older woman's eyes locked and held hers, leaving her feeling examined and scrutinized. Uneasily, Katniss ducked back in the room, swearing softly. Shit- she hadn't given any thought to the fact that Peeta had probably shown her picture to his mother, and the woman might recognize her. She grabbed a new magazine from the rack and sat down again, feeling awkward, debating whether she ought to go down the hall and introduce herself.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta walked through the door while still debating her plan's merits, though, much to her relief.</p><p> </p><p>"Hey," she said gratefully, standing up to greet him, "how's your dad?"</p><p> </p><p>"He's tired, but in pretty good spirits overall. I mean, it's weird to see my dad in a hospital bed." Peeta stepped closer and wrapped his arms around her, holding her tightly against him. It reiterated in her mind that coming with him this weekend had been the right decision. "I'm so glad you're here, you have no idea. Thank you."</p><p> </p><p>She laid her head on his chest. "I'm pretty sure I saw your mom- at least I think that was her?" she asked.</p><p> </p><p>"Yep, she's in his room harassing the shit out of him right now, so I stepped out for a few minutes."</p><p> </p><p>She had to laugh at that.</p><p> </p><p>"I'm not joking," Peeta added, "Dad's kind of got it coming though, honestly. He was having symptoms for weeks, and he didn't tell anyone."</p><p> </p><p>"I didn't think you were joking," Katniss told him honestly. "I mean, what's up with them? You made it sound like they hate each other, but I know I heard her call him her husband."</p><p> </p><p>"They have kind of a screwed-up relationship; I don't know what else to say. It's like Mom and Dad still love each other, but they can't get along; they never could- the divorce was best for all of us, but they still can't seem to let each other go."</p><p> </p><p>"Funny, huh?" It was strange to think that two middle-aged people still felt that strongly about each other- it seemed at his parents' age they ought to have their feelings for each other sorted out.</p><p> </p><p>"We put the <em> fun </em> in dysfunctional, that's for sure." Peeta's expression changed, and he glanced around at the other people in the waiting room. His voice dropped. "Do you want to step outside with me for a minute? I figured once my brothers leave in a little bit, we'll go back down there, and you can meet Mom and Dad then."</p><p> </p><p>Katniss linked their fingers together- she was more than ready to go outside for a while. "Yeah- I could use some fresh air. I don't need to meet them yet if he's not up to it, though."</p><p> </p><p>"I think he is; they're both looking forward to meeting you."</p><p> </p><p>Katniss tried not to overthink her encounter with his mother as they made their way through the hospital corridors and out the front door. Peeta led her around the building and towards a walkway with flowers planted on either side of it. She smiled when she noticed the Evening Primrose bushes- her sister would approve. "This is a nice place," she told him, "the flowers and plants are beautiful."</p><p> </p><p>"My Grandma Mellark has her name on one of these," he said, indicating the benches scattered across the walkway. "I think they're all from hospice patient's families- that's the only reason I knew this was here, it's not like I've spent a lot of time at the hospital or anything, at least not this one- my rehab stuff was all at the children's hospital."</p><p> </p><p>"A bench is a nice way to remember someone," Katniss said, "it's like she's offering others a resting place now. I like that."</p><p> </p><p>Peeta smiled. "Let's sit down," he said, tugging her towards one of the seats. They sat down together. "Have I ever told you that I love the way your mind works?"</p><p> </p><p>Katniss shook her head. "I don't know what you're talking about," she said softly- she didn't share most of her thoughts with others, even Peeta.</p><p> </p><p>He put his hand on her knee. "You are- you're deep beneath that quiet side you show people, and you care so much. I adore everything about you." </p><p> </p><p>"You're not so bad yourself," she told him, rubbing her thumb across his fingers. She was so glad she'd taken a chance on him- he'd been entirely worth it. She could only hope he wouldn't change his mind somewhere down the line- she was in too deep. It would probably kill her.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta let out a breath. "So, it's just that seeing Dad in that hospital bed today got me thinking about a lot of things."</p><p> </p><p>"Like what?"</p><p> </p><p>He shrugged, ruffling a hand through his hair before letting it drop again. "I just got to thinking about how life is short, and sometimes things happen unexpectedly. And I don't want to have any regrets with you." Peeta paused and took her hand, looking into her eyes with intent. "So you need to know, and I'm really sorry this isn't more romantic or well-thought-out than telling you in the hospital flower garden," he paused to laugh at himself, and it made her smile. "I love you, Katniss. I'm in love with you."</p><p> </p><p>"You are?" she whispered. It felt impossible to breathe. This wasn't really what she'd anticipated today at all, although a part of her wasn't surprised- behind all her own self-doubts, she knew Peeta's feelings for her were serious.</p><p> </p><p>He nodded, never breaking eye contact. His eyes were wide- she knew he was nervous. "I am. I don't know how you feel about me-"<br/>
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</p><p>"I love you too," she said, relieved to have the words out after fighting her conflicting feelings for so long.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta's smile stretched ear to ear, matching her own. And then he kissed her on a hospital garden bench, and it wasn't even one named after his grandma.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss had never been happier.</p><p><br/>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Katniss spends some time getting to know Peeta's family.</p>
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  <span>Katniss was loading the last dirty cup into the dishwasher, looking out the kitchen window when Rye’s car pulled into Mr. Mellark’s driveway. </span>
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  <span>She’d spent the last several hours at her boyfriend’s father’s house, cleaning up some while waiting for Peeta and his brothers to come back with stuff to fix for dinner. Not that the house was dirty- there was just a general air of disorder. Still, she figured getting rushed to the emergency room didn’t leave much time for picking up after oneself, so Katniss decided to be useful while she was waiting. </span>
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  <span>The house wasn’t large, so it didn’t take her long to find everything. After locating the laundry room, she threw the load of towels waiting next to the washing machine inside of it, and then while the washer was going, she ran the vacuum. Once the washer stopped, she threw the clean load into the dryer before deciding to take care of the dirty cups and bowls in the sink.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It wasn’t just concern for Mr. Mellark that influenced her cleaning spree, though. She was still nervous about staying here with Peeta and his family this weekend, even though they had all tried to make her feel welcome. Finding things to do seemed the best way to burn off some of that excess, anxiety-related energy.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss glanced up when Peeta walked through the side door that led into the house from the garage. He kissed her lightly before setting the bag of groceries on the counter. “Hey, love,” he said, slipping his around her waist and smiling down at her. “Thanks for doing this stuff; even if I told you a thousand times, it wasn’t necessary. Stubborn ass.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s fine,” Katniss said, rolling her eyes at him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She wanted to pinch his side in retaliation for calling her names, but she decided to let it go. The last time they’d started messing around that way, things had become heated between them in a hurry. Now wasn’t the time for that with his brothers out in the garage. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s not like there was anything else for me to do while you were gone.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Dad’s place probably hasn’t been this clean in years,” Peeta joked, loosening his arms from around her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>His dad’s house had looked pretty decent when she got here, in her opinion. It was probably cleaner than her apartment stayed when she and Prim were busy at the flower shop, but she left that detail out.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss didn’t want to fuss with Peeta for acting like something minor she’d done for his dad was a big deal, so she kissed him, letting her lips linger against his. Like a girl with her first crush, she'd missed Peeta while he was at the hospital. She hated to be away from him after the way they’d told each other how they felt.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Not only that, Katniss was eager to </span>
  <em>
    <span>show</span>
  </em>
  <span> him how she felt. Thank goodness she didn’t have to wait another week to have sex with him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>To her surprise, her period must not have started; after all- she hadn’t bled anymore than that small spot on the toilet paper this morning. While that wasn’t typical of her cycle, she wasn’t concerned about it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Besides, it’s not like she could be pregnant; she and Peeta have used protection, and bleeding didn’t mean pregnancy. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss was just glad she was free to give in to her hunger for him; she felt incredibly close to him right now, and she wanted to </span>
  <em>
    <span>be</span>
  </em>
  <span> close to him too. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p><span>While she wasn’t quite used to saying the words </span><em><span>I</span></em> <em><span>love</span></em> <em><span>you</span></em><span> out loud yet, it wasn’t as though she felt it any less; in fact, the knowledge the two of them were on the same page left her ready to burst. How had things turned out so well for her in such a short amount of time? This relationship with Peeta wasn’t a typical Katniss Everdeen development. Maybe her luck was changing. </span></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“How’s your dad?” Katniss asked, resting her hand on his arm. What she wanted to do was jump into Peeta’s arms and tell him to carry her out of the room and down the hall to his bedroom. It sounded fun, getting ravished in his childhood home-</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“More relaxed since Mom left,” Peeta said, digging into the grocery bag and pulling things out. “But Dad didn’t complain too much- he knew he had it coming. I think she threatened him enough- he’s too afraid to let something like this happen again.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss laughed. “Good. I liked him,” she told Peeta as an afterthought. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>His father seemed like a genuinely kind person.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, after you left, he told me you were “a keeper,” Peeta lined the groceries up evenly on  the counter, “so the feeling was mutual.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“He’s right,” Phil chimed in, following Rye through the back door. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta’s oldest brother was an unrelenting suck-up, Katniss had decided; beneath that, he seemed alright, though, so she just ignored him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Do I want to know what your mom thought of me?” Katniss asked. Her tone was light, but she was only half-joking; she was a little afraid of the woman, although his mom had been polite. Probably just residual guilt from spying on her earlier.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“She liked you too,” Peeta said, nudging her with his elbow, “so you’re officially part of the family now.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss rolled her eyes at him, but secretly she couldn’t help feeling pleased. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>An hour or so later, Katniss and the guys sat down to a simple dinner of bread, pork tenderloin, and a salad that Peeta whipped up for them. She hung out in the kitchen while he worked, drinking some hot tea. They were both quiet, but it was a companionable silence. Katniss was tired, and Peeta seemed that way too.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She offered to help, but Peeta brushed it off. He found cooking to be relaxing, while for her, it wasn’t a task she enjoyed. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>However, Katniss did like eating, and by the time the food was ready, and on the table, her stomach was growling; she’d been snacking all day but was still ravenous.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Looks great, Peet,” Rye said, leaning over his plate and focusing his gaze on the food as he ate. His eyes closed as soon as he took the first bite. “It’s been a while since I’ve had anything this good,” he admitted around a mouthful, looking up again sheepishly. “I’m lazy unless I’ve got the girls.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss smiled sympathetically at him, already aware of the less-than-stellar situation with Rye and his daughters. He didn’t get to see often since their mother remarried and moved them to Pittsburg. “It’s easy to let stuff slide when you live alone, isn’t’ it?” she said softly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rye didn’t say anything before going back to his meal, but he did catch her eye in acknowledgment. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss wasn’t offended by his standoffishness anymore. She didn’t think Rye was full of himself like she’d initially decided, and certainly not because he wouldn’t elaborate on the subject. It made perfect sense his daughters were a sensitive topic. If she had kids herself, she’d hate any kind of separation from them. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss had a large role in raising Prim after her father died, so she felt she understood Rye a little better. Those years spent taking care of things while her mother was catatonic in her misery were undoubtedly the roughest period in her life. Between managing her grief and keeping her family from falling apart, Katniss’s burden was more than one girl should’ve shouldered, but not because of Prim. There were days where she would’ve given up trying if it’d just been her. Katniss never looked at Prim as another duty because her sister made getting through each day worth it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Loved ones weren’t a burden; they were just another part of you, no matter what sacrifices you had to make for them.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You should’ve learned to cook easy stuff for yourself the way I did,” Phil joked, taking another piece of meat off the platter. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rye looked up again, finally cracking a smile. “We both know you can’t even make toast. Leevy does all the cooking at your house, and it’s a good thing. You’d starve or live off the golden arches.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Isn’t that kind of ridiculous, growing up at a bakery the way you guys did?” Katniss said. She had to bite back a laugh at the incredulous expressions on Rye’s and Phil’s faces when they turned and looked at her. She’d certainly surprised them by speaking up. It was a wonder she said anything at all. “What exactly did you two do while you were there all those years?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Phil looked ready to make a smart comment in reply but was interrupted before he got the chance to speak. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“They never learned anything,” Peeta said around a mouthful of food, waving his fork back and forth between his older brothers while using his other hand to cover his mouth. At least he was trying not to look like a cave dweller while he ate. “The two of them spent more time trying to get out of work than anything.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s rich coming from you, gimp,” Phil cut in. “We didn’t have an excuse to get out of working like you did. I did my duty to Mellarks- eighteen long years.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So, you were working behind the counters as an infant?” Rye said, frowning at his brother, “those numbers don’t add up, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Phillip, </span>
  </em>
  <span>because we both know you never darkened the door after graduation.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, I did, for your information,” Phil said. “I was kneading my first dough at eight months-you can ask Mom.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss looked down at her plate to hide the smile threatening to steal across her face. Peeta’s brothers were pretty entertaining; she had to admit.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And then promptly forgot everything Dad taught you the day you moved out,” Peeta muttered. He reached for his glass of water, taking a drink before speaking again. “It was record time- a miracle, really- the ability to forget everything you learned overnight. You ought to write a book on the exact method you used, you know?”</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ll admit it’s a gift.”</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rye was already back to eating, leaving Phil and Peeta to spar back and forth. Katniss concluded that Rye must be the shy brother- considering how gregarious Phil and Peeta both were, it wasn’t any surprise. Someone had to be quiet in this chatty bunch. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She felt some guilt thinking about the way she’d judged Rye when she first met him. He was alright- and it was nice to know there was at least one Mellark brother in the world who wouldn’t talk your ear off.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Phil pointed at the basket on Peeta’s right side. “Pass the bread, would you?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Here,” he said, handing his brother the basket, “now shut up already,” Peeta glanced over at Katniss. When she found his hand underneath the table, she squeezed it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She was glad she’d decided to come with him this weekend.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>After they finished eating and cleaning up the kitchen, Rye and Phil took off for the night, leaving Katniss and Peeta alone for the evening. They talked about whether they wanted to out again or just settle in at his dad’s for the night.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta wanted to take her out to see the farm. She knew his grandfather had been gone for a long time, but his uncle still lived there. Katniss gave him some severe side-eye at the suggestion, so he quickly reassured her that the equipment from his accident was long gone by now. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>That was okay then, she guessed, but leaving the house was still a no-go at that point. After spending a good chunk of the day with his family, Katniss had her fill with new experiences. She was exhausted- ridiculously so, considering she hadn’t done much of anything today. She'd slept almost ten hours the night before, and that was weird.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>”What about tomorrow morning? He has some calves and lambs now.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ugh- that was a dirty move. Who could say no to baby animals? “But we’re not going to do anything that could result in you losing another limb, right?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Nah, their teeth aren’t that sharp.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>After promising her, seriously, that they’d both come back in one piece because a small working farm wasn’t typically a dangerous place, Katniss agreed that would be fine. That settled things, so they changed into pajamas and settled in for the evening on his dad's oversize couch. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>”What are you in the mood for?” Peeta asked, flopping down on the couch, stretching out his legs on the coffee table. He leaned over and grabbed the remote before flipping on the television. ”Comedy, drama-”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss sunk onto the couch and leaned against him, tucking her feet beneath her. “It’s up to you,” she said, yawning against the back of her hand. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s been a long day,” Peeta said, putting his arm around her waist and pulling her close. She tucked the crown of her head under his chin, and he tilted his head to brush a kiss there. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta leaned further back into the plush corner of the couch, pulling her along with him until she was lying pressed against his side. She slung her knee over his thigh and looped her arm around his waist. His stomach rose and fell with each breath. “Your brothers are funny,” Katniss told him once she was settled, turning her face into his side and yawning again. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Why was she so tired? </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her plans for sex tonight seemed to be drifting further and further away by the second- maybe if she took a quick power nap, though.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“They’re alright, I guess,” Peeta said jokingly. He set the remote on the end table and curled into her further, resting his hand on her leg. She couldn’t see his face but the smile in his voice was evident.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I think I have them figured out,” she said softly. “Phil is a disaster-man, and Rye is the shy one.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He chuckled, and the sound rumbled beneath her ear. “That’s a pretty spot-on description.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss felt her eyes slip closed as he continued talking. Her boyfriend was warm and comfortable, and with the plushness of the couch beneath her and the drone of the television on in the background, she wasn’t sure how much longer she could keep her eyes open.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t know if I’ve ever told you this- probably not, it's better just to move on and not dwell on the past and all that crap, but the accident was tough on all of us.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That doesn’t seem strange,” Katniss admitted. “I mean, families sort of function like a single unit. What affects one person affects them all.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta laughed. “That’s not really how I’d describe mine.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>”I don't know; you guys seem close to me. But what happened after the accident?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta shrugged, causing her upper body to rise and fall beneath him. He ran his fingers back and forth across her leg in a soothing motion. “They all felt guilty, even though it wasn't anyone’s fault but my own. Rye took it the hardest since he was there when it happened. It made things strained between us for a long time.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss pushed herself up enough to look at him. He seemed to want to talk, so she would force herself to stay awake for it. She wasn’t sure how long she could last but would try to hang in for a while anyway.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It wasn’t blatant on his part. Rye wasn’t a jerk or anything; he just shut me out of his life. Shut all of us out. He would barely talk to any of us.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ah, another thing Katniss had in common with Rye. She’d spent the majority of her life as an expert on shutting people out too. “You guys don’t seem to have a strained relationship now, though, ” she said.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It took us a while to get there, but it’s been eleven years since the accident. I think things between us have been pretty good for the last five.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What about your parents and Phil?” she asked, interested. She wanted to know everything about Peeta.</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Mom and Dad divorced a few months before the accident. At least I didn’t have to blame myself for that, too.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss groaned; she knew what he meant, though.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“But seriously, they were still at each other’s throats most of the time. Phil just about killed himself trying to do any little thing he could think of for them or me- trying to make up for not being there to save the day, I guess. I know he blamed himself for not being there when it happened.” Peeta sighed. “He’s always been a people pleaser.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re a people pleaser yourself,” Katniss chided him gently, laying down again and shifting against his side. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her limbs were heavy; her whole body felt like it was lead. The realization hit her then, the way things do when you’re thinking about something else, that she’d been tired a lot lately. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She needed to make that doctor’s appointment first thing Monday- Katniss couldn’t afford to have something wrong with her that would keep her away from the flower shop for long periods right now. Maybe she had some kind of vitamin deficiency or something- perhaps that was why she hadn’t gotten her period.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m more of the peacemaker,” he said, bringing her back to the subject at hand. Katniss smirked against his chest. “Phil, though, he is the master of keeping people happy, always doing stuff for them or making jokes to smooth over tense situations. It’s exhausting to watch.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Classic oldest child syndrome,” she agreed, thinking of a long-past freshman psychology class, or maybe just some article she’d read in a magazine. It was hard to keep track of where the information residing in her brain came from sometimes.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re the oldest in your family,” Peeta reminded her, his hand at her waist squeezing her gently.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss propped herself up to look at him again. He looked amused. “So, what is that supposed to mean? I’m not a people-pleaser.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta burst out laughing as she scowled at him. “Come on, Katniss, you are such a people-pleaser! You just have a limited number of people you like to please.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s not true!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Listen, I’m not saying it’s a bad thing. It’s not; it’s good. You care about people, and it’s beautiful.” Peeta’s voice softened. “It’s one of the things I love the most about you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss studied him intently. She wished for the millionth time as those deep, intense things she felt for him gnawed at her belly, that she was better at expressing herself. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was so easy for him to say </span>
  <em>
    <span>love</span>
  </em>
  <span> to her so casually. She knew Peeta didn’t love her any less for the ease with which he said so because that was just his nature. He did love freely, without fears or hang-ups to hold him back, and that was one of the things she loved most about him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But damn it if she knew how to tell him all of that.“You’re too much, you know that?” she finally said.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta frowned slightly. “What do you mean? I’m not pushing you some way or-”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss sat up the rest of the way so he could see her. “I don’t exactly know how to say what I mean, but you just seem too good to be true sometimes.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He barked out a surprised laugh. “That’s not right. I’m far from too good to be true. Are you kidding me?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She shook her head, not dissuaded. “You don’t see it, do you?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta shook his head. “No, I don’t, but you have to know that whatever you feel for me- I swear, mine is at least double that.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss had to laugh at his words. He could be so dramatic. Despite that, happiness steadily crawled further inside her, threatening to take up permanent residence there. It scared the hell out of her. “How can love be doubled?” she asked, trying to get him to dial it back a little because this all seemed too intense. “Love is an emotion- it’s knowing someone, not a cookie recipe.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta moved his hand from her thigh and took her hand. His eyes were steady there as he threaded his fingers with hers. “Love doesn’t have to make sense, I guess.” he looked at her then, and the absolute seriousness in his expression floored her. “All I know is that I am absolutely, insanely in love with you, Katniss.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Stupidly, she didn’t have the words to answer him. It was her biggest frustration, the way the things she wanted to say always managed to get stuck somewhere between her heart and her throat. “I don’t think I deserve you,” she managed to say, pressing her forehead against his chin because she couldn’t take him looking at her like that anymore. His breath felt warm against the top of her head.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Kat, that’s crazy,” Peeta chuckled gently but pulled her closer. “Don’t say that.”</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I always hurt people,” Katniss admitted in a burst of raw honesty that she blamed on her weariness or hormones; she couldn’t be sure. Despite knowing she might regret it later, she kept talking. “Even when I don't mean to or when I’m trying to be what they need- I hurt them. I just can’t seem to make anything last in the long run.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And then to her absolute horror, she started crying, as if what she’d said wasn’t bad enough.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey, it’s alright,” Peeta said. He sucked in a sharp breath and held it for a moment, but then he laughed softly. “I don’t know if this is some feeble attempt to warn me off of you, but I’ve got to say it’s not working.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>That just made her cry even harder. Peeta’s arms felt so good that Katniss crawled up his body until she was in his lap with her arms around his neck. She sobbed into his shoulder while he ran a soothing hand back and forth across the base of her spine. “Just don’t go anywhere, please,” she whimpered.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you okay?” he asked, laughing gently. “You know it’s alright.” He seemed bewildered by her tears but not upset, which was unlike any experience she’d had involving crying and men.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Why am I crying?</span>
  </em>
  <span> Katniss asked herself as she buried her nose in the space between Peeta’s neck and shoulder. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m happy- there’s no reason to be so emotional.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>No matter what she did, she couldn’t seem to stop the waterworks. Eventually, Peeta even began rocking back and forth on the couch with her. She knew they had to look ridiculous, but when she started to protest, he shushed her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ve got an idea,” he said, shifting forward enough to grab the remote and switch off the television. “You wanna go to bed?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss nodded in the affirmative from her space with her nose buried against his neck. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta somehow managed to get them both up from the couch. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It wasn’t how she’d imagined tonight- she’d visualized Peeta carrying her to bed, but not under circumstances that involved her as a tired, weepy mess. But she felt loved more than she thought possible as he pulled the covers up over them both, holding her until she fell asleep.</span>
</p>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>It shouldn't take me too long to get the last chapter out- it's partially written and mostly planned out in my mind. :) Thanks for reading, and don't be afraid to let me know what you think.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. The Night In Question, Part 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>This is part one of two chapters that cover a flashback I'm calling The Night In Question. It's a look at their relationship on the night the slip up happens that results in the unplanned pregnancy that Katniss and Peeta aren't aware of as of yet :).</p>
<p>I'm splitting this chapter in half because I prefer to keep my chapters on the shorter side, and I also delved into the couple's relationship with Delly a little more here and didn't want to rush that. </p>
<p>The second half of The Night In Question will be ready soon. It's partially written and completely plotted out.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Delly strolled over to where Peeta stood at the tattoo shop’s back counter with his head bowed over his tablet, deep in thought. That was his typical mode when plotting out designs or experimenting with how different color gradients will appear on different skin tones, one of his current projects. Whatever he was doing, if it involved his art, Peeta always seemed lost inside his head while working.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Not that his temporary state of aloofness ever stopped Delly from claiming his attention. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey,” she chirped, reaching his side. “What’s up?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seconds passed until finally, Peeta glanced over. “Not much Dels, what’s up with you?” he asked, his focus quickly returning to the tablet. It wasn’t easy to draw him out of his head when he was working. Peeta typically filled any unexpected free time at the shop, working on other projects. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He liked to keep busy there, so he didn’t have to take anything home with him- at least that’s what he told Katniss. She thought his <em>keep</em> <em>work at work</em> philosophy had a lot to do with how much he enjoyed the space at the shop. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The tattoo shop was housed in an old building with natural wood and lofted ceilings, not too large but big enough for a comfortable, clutter-free space. The shop’s front wall was glass, and two of the interior walls were sunset orange and covered in various examples of his and Delly’s artwork- collages and paintings. The fourth wall was unpainted, but Peeta had begun to sketch out a mural he wanted to start painting soon. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The only reason he’d waited to start the mural project was because of how unexpectedly busy their shop had been since they opened. It’d taken little time for word to spread about the quality of Peeta’s and Delly’s work. The two of them had rapidly built up a solid clientele that was steadily growing. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>There was only some unexpected downtime tonight because their last client of the evening had called and canceled, and all tattoo work required an appointment. They didn’t accept walk-ins, so they probably could have locked up early, but they made it a point not to do that. In case someone wanted to call for an appointment or stop by and look at what they had to offer or even discuss future work. In addition to their work quality, Katniss knew the individual focus on each client kept people coming back. Peeta and Delly treated their customers like friends and priorities.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss was a little jealous of their ease with people coming in and out of the tattoo shop. She couldn’t pretend her less-than outgoing personality was what kept customers coming back to her place. Prim helped buffer her surliness, though, so it worked out alright. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Soft music played in the background, and the overhead lights were down, leaving a cozy feel to the interior. Several music genres were kept on rotation at the shop; the one Peeta favored listening to while he sketched on paper or drew on his design program was on now, classic rock songs Katniss teased him for being his “dad” playlist. Secretly, she’d developed a liking for many of his musical choices. Queen and The Eagles and Eric Clapton were cool. Led Zepplin was fun, although most of their songs were over the top. Sometimes Peeta would lip-sync with Robert Plant when he was feeling goofy, which always made her laugh.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss had only been here for a few minutes. She’d walked over to hang out with them after closing up the flower shop for the night since the two of them were planning on spending the evening at his place; apparently, she’d arrived just in time for a display from Delly. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That’s not much of a greeting for your oldest friend, now is it?” Delly prodded, nudging Peeta’s side. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He closed his eyes with a little sigh in recognition that he wasn’t going to get any more work done as long as she insisted on his undivided attention. “What’s up?” he asked after turning his screen off.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss looked away to keep her smile in check. She tried to keep out of things between the two of them, and there was no way to keep a straight face when Delly fluttered her wide green eyes, a good indication she was about to ask a favor. Not that Delly needed to put on the extra show because Peeta would do pretty much anything for his best friend, and they all knew it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Over the five months Katniss has spent dating Peeta, she took some time to get to know Delly, too, since the two are somewhat of a package deal between the business and their friendship. As exuberant and outgoing as Delly is, she can’t help but like her. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>It didn’t take very long for the initial jealousy Katniss felt over their close relationship and very brief dating history to disappear. There was nothing but a familial type of love between Peeta and Delly- they just treated each other like a close brother and sister; in fact, their relationship reminded Katniss of her own with Prim.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>If Katniss were honest, she would admit it helped her jealousy when Peeta let her know that he and Delly hadn’t been intimate with each other. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>One day Peeta just said, “I’ve never had sex with Delly, just so you know,” out of the blue, matter-of-factly. It was easy to see he must’ve sensed her apprehension and decided to make things easy on her by being upfront about their history without her having to ask him. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>If they’d been intimate, it would’ve made Delly and Peeta’s close relationship harder to come to terms with; but for once in Katniss’s life, fate had seen fit to hand her an easy answer. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She appreciated the respite. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Delly threw her arm over Peeta’s shoulder, smiling up at him winningly, to which he sighed. “I know you want something. You might as well spill your guts.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She pouted. “Why can’t I just come over here and hug my friend? You’re so suspicious of my motives all the time. Geez- relax, would you?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They stared each other down for a moment, a silent battle of wills, until Peeta finally gave in, the furrow in his brow dropping. “Fine. It’s nice to see you too,” he said obligingly, pulling Delly in for a side hug and kissing the top of her head. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She smiled.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“How’s life treating you?” Peeta continued, definitely sounding amused. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>There was no way of stopping the Delly train when she was determined to have her way. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>”I’m great, actually!” she said happily. “Things are good. You know, this and that. Did I tell you I talked to my brother this morning?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You mentioned that. Is Rob coming for a visit, finally? It’s about time,” he said. “I haven’t seen him in so long.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“He just got the time off work. New job and all, but he won’t be here till next week. He will mostly be here on my days off, though, so we don’t need to change the schedule.” She paused. “It’s not about his visit, but there is one <em> tiny </em> favor I wanted to ask you-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Peeta’s eyes zoomed over and connected with Katniss’s over the top of Delly’s head. He looked exasperated, but like he was trying not to laugh when he mouthed- <em> here it comes</em>, <em> finally</em>. She shrugged discreetly and tried not to laugh.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss had to think part of her appeal to Peeta was her straightforwardness- the way she didn’t typically beat around the bush. Delly’s thought process was complicated enough for one important woman in his life, and she wasn’t interested in competing with his friend. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Delly finally got to the point. “I’m supposed to meet up with someone tonight- are you alright if I head out early? I told her I’d try to be there by seven.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Is it that girl you’ve been talking to?” Katniss asked, cocking an eyebrow at her. “The hairdresser with the spiked hair?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah, that’s Jo.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She laughed. “Cool, she sounds fun. Good for you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We hit it off,” Delly admitted. Her eyes were bright, and her cheeks reddening under their combined scrutiny. “She’s not exactly the settling down type, though, and I keep telling everyone that’s what I’m looking for in my next relationship.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss rolled her eyes. “I don’t think you need to worry about that on a first date.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Delly shrugged. “Probably not.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Outside of spending time with Delly because of her relationship with Peeta, she and Katniss had become pretty good friends. They even went so far as to hang out alone together, which was out of the norm for Katniss; she’d tended to gravitate more towards having male companionship, if any. There was her friend Madge, but she’d gone abroad to study music after high school and hadn’t made it back home often since.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As they developed a bridge of trust with each other, Delly began sharing things with her that went deeper than the surface stuff, even if Katniss remained tight-lipped about her own issues. She’d always been more of a listener, anyway. Katniss knew all about Delly’s conservative family- how she was still close to her brother but wasn’t with either of her parents because they remained quietly disapproving of what they referred to as her “lifestyle choice.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Delly first brought the subject up one of the nights when the two of them were out alone together. She’d had a few glasses of wine in her at that point, and her perky, typical persona fell off for a while, replaced by raw feelings and hurt brought up by the painful topic. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss knew she couldn’t entirely grasp that feeling due to a lack of personal experience. Still, she could only imagine what being rejecting for merely existing as the person you were would do to you, especially when that rejection came from the people who created you and raised you. </p>
<p>She would never understand how parents could treat their children that way, putting ideologies and ignorant beliefs ahead of their son or daughter, just because of the gender they were attracted to or who they loved.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Delly was very emotional when she confessed that trying to earn her parent’s approval by minimizing herself around them had her miserable. Her Mom and Dad only half-accepted her coming out. Instead, they chose to lean hard into the <em>don’t ask any questions, and maybe it’ll go away </em>attitude. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Their disapproval, along with the end of her first serious relationship, was much of the reason why Delly took Peeta up on his offer to move to Panem and open the tattoo shop together. She was working for a thriving place back home at the time but needed a change of scenery and some breathing room, while Peeta needed the help.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I know they still love me,” Delly had told her, “even if my mom keeps mentioning single men to set me up with or says stuff about trying to make a relationship with Peeta work again.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“But you guys weren’t serious or anything,” Katniss had asked, frowning in confusion. Not that she expected Delly’s parents to know Peeta was dating <em>her </em>or anything. The comments were just weird and intrusive from them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We weren’t at all. Kissing Peeta was like kissing my brother. “ Delly had laughed, waving her hands like the idea was so ridiculous she could shoo it away. “He’s just the only guy I ever dated. You’d think my parents would remember how I showed zero interest in boys while I was at home. But at least my mom only brings it up a few times a year now,” she said. Her eyes flitted to the tabletop, trying to hide the hurt. “Who knows? Maybe if I find the right girl, Mom will finally drop it for good.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Even being as un-physically demonstrative as Katniss typically was, she leaned across the table and hugged Delly without hesitation. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>What else could she do when her friend was hurting? </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Delly, you know you don’t owe them that. Right?” she’d reminded her. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Something about comforting such an outgoing, normally wildly-confident person was a bit surreal. Katniss had never been sure of her advice-giving capabilities, but this seemed kind of obvious, to her at least. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>She just hoped her words didn’t sound insensitive- she didn’t want to be the know-it-all straight friend who didn’t know what any of it was like in the first place. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Deep down, Katniss realized she was reminding Delly of things she already knew were true. Everyone needed reassurance that their choices were the right ones at a low moment. “Your mom and dad’s bias is on them, period,” she’d said, arms still around Delly. “They have to work through that. You were honest with them, and they owe you acceptance of the way you are, especially because they love you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>And despite Katniss’s misgivings about speaking up on the subject, her reassurances that Delly was just fine as the person she was and most of all she deserved to be happy as she was, seemed to help her friend. So the news that Delly was pursuing something with another woman that might be for fun, or could have the potential to turn into something more, was music to her ears. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Do you mind if I go, then?” Delly asked. “I know I was supposed to close out the register tonight.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss shook her head. “We aren’t doing anything exciting tonight,” she said, walking over to Peeta. She looked at him and shrugged. “Just eating dinner and falling asleep in front of the television so far as I know.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Of course, I don’t care,” Peeta agreed, laughing. “Go, have fun. Live a little.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Delly hugged them both and left quickly, and once she was out the door, Peeta followed her to the front door and locked it. As he went to the large front window and shut the switch off on the neon <b> <em>Open </em></b>sign, Katniss leaned over the counter, staring at him in confusion. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Are you going to play hooky too?” She asked, puzzled as he began turning the blinds. “You don’t have to do that on my account. I’m fine with staying.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Good,” Peeta said. He turned around and leaned his back against the door, crossing his arms over his broad chest. “I was planning to stay for a while and get some more work done.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Okay- why did you close up then?” Katniss asked, confused. Peeta was acting strange, but something about how he smiled at her from across the room was cat-like.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He straightened up then. As Peeta walked her way, he grasped the collar of his shirt and tugged it up and over his head, tossing it on the counter when he reached her side.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The warmth started low in her belly, flaring through her the way it always did when he was near her in various states of undress. Katniss silently assessed him, unsure what he was planning to do but anticipating it none the less. They’d never really fooled around at the shop before, not that she was entirely opposed to it or anything- there was a certain appeal to the idea, especially when her gorgeous boyfriend was staring at her the way he was.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Katniss remained still as Peeta took hold of the hem of her shirt. “May I?” he asked softly, tugging lightly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She nodded, her heart in her throat. Katniss lifted her arms over her head and allowed him to pull the shift off her body. Next, he reached behind her back and unsnapped her bra. She let the strapless lingerie fall to the ground without resistance, her breathing picking up as she felt the air against her bare breasts. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Then, Peeta stepped back and assessed her, his eyes raking over her naked upper body. He hadn’t even kissed her or touched her yet, not deliberately, but Katniss swore she could feel every sweep of his eyes over her skin.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Peeta looked up, meeting her gaze. His expression was warm and full of desire; he sounded a little short of breath when he spoke, as affected by her as she was him. “Will you pose for me?” he asked. When she didn’t answer right away, he grinned. “Please. I want to draw you here. I want you to be the centerpiece of my mural.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What? No. I don’t want to let everyone that comes in here see my- my-”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Peeta laughed gently. He pulled her closer by her shoulders and brushed a kiss across her lips. “I didn’t mean your bare breasts,” he explained. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He stepped back again, and Katniss finally realized that he was just trying to make her more comfortable by taking his shirt off earlier- he wasn’t planning on disrobing any further. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Peeta took her hand in his and moved them across the front of her torso. The motion draped her forearm across her chest, covering her nipples and most of the swell of her breasts. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I was thinking something like this, with you looking off to the side.” He explained. “Or maybe you presenting your back to me and glancing over your shoulder.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“But why do you want to do that?” Katniss asked, dumbfounded. There was nothing special about her- not her body, not her face, not anything. It didn’t make sense that Peeta would want to do this.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Because you’re beautiful,” Peeta answered as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “I never get tired of looking at you. Every beautiful thing I see now just feels like a reflection of you.”</p>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading, chapter 7 will be up fairly soon!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. The Night In Question, Part 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Part 2 of 3 of a flashback to the, ahem, Night in Question.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I hope no one is getting annoyed with the way I keep splitting this section of the story. :) (I know you guys don't care- I have to say that because it annoys me that my brain won't cooperate the way I would like it too lol)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“So, will you pose for me?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss opened her mouth, then immediately closed it because she was unsure what would come out. She fought the frown forming at the corner of her lips, simply because Peeta was so ecstatic over his plans, and she didn’t want to crush that. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her first instinct was to grab her shirt, put it back on, and get away from the excitement in his eyes. Instead, she remained quiet, giving herself a moment to consider things. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss didn’t like making her decisions spur of the moment, and Peeta had certainly sprung this one on her. She typically wanted to have more time to think things through than what he was currently offering. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>But it helped that he was touching her shoulder and talking to her in that soothing tone of voice.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The smile on Peeta’s face was dazzling, like a child sharing their most prized secret who’s sure you’re going to love what he’s telling you too. “Do you remember the first time I came to your flower shop and annoyed you?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Vaguely, ” she teased, rolling her eyes because it was easier than being honest.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss would never forget feeling so overwhelmed by Peeta the first time they met. Specifically, how he leaned in behind her, caging her body in against the counter. It wasn’t just a physical force, either. Peeta held her captive with a cocky, teasing voice in her ear and that cologne-and-man smell of his. It made her insides tug reflexively just thinking about it.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss could visualize herself as an old woman, sitting alone in a nursing home sixty years from now, and she just instinctively knew the memory of him that afternoon would leave her pleasantly warm. That day had burned itself into her brain forever.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course I do,” she admitted. “You were hard not to notice.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta’s lips quirked up in the corner. “I had a thing for you from the first time I saw you, I swear. I was a goner,” he said.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She wanted to laugh- if he only knew. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You did kind of act like a pesky boy with a crush,” Katniss agreed, thinking about those early days before they got to know each other. She’d been kid-like herself with Peeta, clueless for so long to his interest in her. The idea that an outlandishly handsome tattoo artist was interested in ordinary little her had seemed so improbable, and she’d tried to deny her attraction to him for so long. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was a wonder they’d made it this far at all.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I guess I wasn’t the smoothest, but you unnerved me with the whole fuck-off vibe you had going on,” Peeta admitted. “After you scorned me that day-”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss snorted. It brought her out of the memories of that overwhelming guy and into the present, where he’d somehow become her boyfriend. Peeta was so dramatic sometimes. “Who says scorned?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You did- you burned a hole in my confidence with that silver stare,” he said, waving at the front door. “I left your place and ran back here with my tail tucked between my legs. But did I still picture those eyes, your face and hair, and the set of your shoulders when I started thinking about the mural? Yes, I did. That scowl stuck with me, Everdeen.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p><span>Katniss turned her head towards the blank space on the wall they were discussing, frowning at it. “So even if we’d never gotten together, you still wanted me there-” she finally said, genuinely baffled because honestly, </span><em><span>who</span></em> <em><span>did</span></em> <em><span>that</span></em><span>, “on your wall, in the shop, where you could look at me every day. That’s kind of stalkerish.” </span></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She watched Peeta bite his lip to keep from laughing, his eyes wide. “I’m trying to be romantic here. Don’t make it weird. Besides, it wouldn’t have looked just like you- I’m not a creep,” his tone was mock-insulted. “You would have been there, but more in the little details- the lines and curves, not your exact face. You wouldn’t have recognized yourself in it.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And now?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Now it’s going to look at least a little bit like you, if you’ll allow it, anyway.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss sighed. His admission put a lot of pressure on her, whether he realized it or not. She wanted to feel the same excitement Peeta did but just couldn’t seem to get there. But really, why should he think anything of drawing her nude? He was an artist, and the human form was a fairly common theme in art. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta was comfortable in his own skin, just as much as he was comfortable with others’ skin. Familiarity with people’s bodies was essential in his line of work. Tattooing required constant touch and connection with others. He probably didn’t have the first inkling of why posing semi-nude in front of someone who not only saw her naked regularly but she also had a lot of sex with her made Katniss hesitate. She wasn’t shy when they were together, but that seemed completely different from what he asked her to do now. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Tonight there was no desire or ecstasy to hide behind- just her body on display with all her stiffness and discomfort. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Sex was a completely different thing than sitting here, alone, posing. One thing didn’t automatically bleed into the other. Sexually, Katnisswas pretty uninhibited with him- more so than she’d ever been with anyone else. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>But no one else had ever made her feel like Peeta did: beautiful the way she was. Her grasp on the feeling was fleeting. Katniss could never take a permanent hold on that confidence. She wished she could cling to the way he made her feel forever, wrapping herself up in it to wear like a covering over all her insecurities. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>What a silly thing to think. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Flowery nonsense.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss glanced down at her breasts, spilling over the top of the arm she used to cover herself. Not much was visible because her chest wasn’t huge, but it still felt like too much exposure under the bright overhead lights. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Once again, it was one thing to be naked when they were </span>
  <em>
    <span>together</span>
  </em>
  <span>. It was quite another thing to sit across an open room from Peeta while he studied and drew her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss had to wonder why she was so uncomfortable with non-sexual nudity. Posing for him didn’t have to be a big deal; she trusted Peeta implicitly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She was tired of being so uptight. Most halves of a couple wouldn’t bat an eye at the prospect. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>While Katniss didn’t think her figure was anything special, it didn’t seem that bad either. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She had a shape that was kind of on the thin side, just a standard-issue petite girl with all the usual bits and pieces. A body just like everyone possessed and had to exist inside whether they liked it or not- a body used for work and play and love. A body Peeta was smitten with because it was hers. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And he was really into her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The thought made her smile. She even relaxed enough that a low heat came to life in her belly and blossomed outward as she thought about him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>What they had in the bedroom was amazing. It was beautiful. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Was that confident, sexier version of herself what Peeta pictured when he thought about drawing her? Katniss only recognized those bits and pieces of herself as captivating or confident in fleeting moments. Did Peeta always perceive her that way, or was it something else compelling him that she didn’t understand?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey,” he said, interrupting her train of thought. “Are you still with me?” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When Katniss looked up, his eyes were focused solely on her, obviously waiting for her answer. Her cheeks were hot- she knew she had to be blushing. Peeta looked like he was trying to read her mind, and she’d never been so glad as she was at that moment that he didn’t have the ability.  “Yeah, still here. Just thinking,” she muttered.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A languid grin stole across his face. “Let me guess. You’re overthinking it?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Possibly,” Katniss admitted, recalling the myriad of thoughts that’d run wild through her mind like a toddler on Mountain Dew. “It’s kind of what I do.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He moved his hands to her arms again. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her body quivered at his touch, involuntarily, a strange brew of just-below the surface arousal and anxiety feeding into her reaction to him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You are gorgeous,” Peeta told her. “I don’t understand how you can’t see the effect you have on me. And it’s not all here,” he added, brushing her cheek, indicating her face. “Although I like this part of you very much.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her breath caught in her lungs as he dragged his finger down her jaw and neck, across her collarbone and sternum, until it was resting over her heart. He tapped gently. “It’s mostly here.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss hated it, but she seemed to go mute when he said things like that to her. It was physically impossible to get anything to come out of her mouth. Instead, the words stayed trapped in her chest, aching to leave. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She wanted to accept that she was lovely enough to pose for Peeta. She wanted to feel comfortable with letting him display his vision of her on the shop’s wall. Maybe if she could be honest herself, that would be a starting point. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I think you’re beautiful too,” Katniss managed, her eyes focusing on his. She hoped he understood she wasn't just talking about the physical, either. “Every part of you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta’s eyes went soft. “Yeah?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, ” she admitted.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He leaned in and kissed her- a delicate pressing and parting of lips, a little tongue slipping inside her mouth because that was just him: wanting to touch her every way he could, all the time, even if it wasn’t supposed to be sexual.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You promise, though- no breasts in the finished picture?” she asked, closing her eyes and resting her forehead against him to steady herself after he pulled back.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She felt the laughter start in his chest. “No breasts. Unfortunately, there’s always the possibility there could be some side boob. Sometimes it just shows up while I’m painting.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss covered her mouth to smother the laughter threatening to come out. She backed away enough to look up at him, trying to maintain a stern face. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s kind of unavoidable,” Peeta went on casually. “What are you going to do, though? The artist’s eye sees what it sees.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The frown Katniss shot at him was mostly unsuccessful. “Let’s try this again, and be serious this time. Think of it as a negotiation process if you like. Your offer is of a possibility of side boob-”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“A strong possibility. Side boob is pretty much a given.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“-but no nipples?” she ignored his interruption.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta moved closer, kissing her again. It was a pretty effective way to stop the mock-arguing they were having. His mouth on hers, he pushed her arm back to her side, giving himself access to her body as he took the kiss deeper. When his fingers brushed against the tips of her breasts, Katniss whimpered, arching into his touch. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He groaned at her reaction. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She felt him hardening against her stomach. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And god, that felt good. Katniss would agree to let him draw her spread eagle if he kept touching her that way. She was that weak.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No nipples,” Peeta laughed, cupping her breasts oh so casually because he knew she loved it when he touched her there. “Probably a teensy sketch, though, to go with the ones I have at home.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss grabbed his wrists, curling her fingers into his palms and pushing his hands away- as much as the low-burning fire in her belly begged her not to put a halt to what they were doing. “What?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t worry- those pictures are for my eyes only,” Peeta said, wriggling his hands out of her grip and crossing his arms over his chest. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss’s eyes dropped to his muscled forearms against his chest. That move he made was an especially distracting one because arms were among the most attractive things about him. Against the backdrop of his hard, naked chest, Peeta’s light complexion did nothing but accentuate the bright ink of his tattoos, particularly the sleeve of birds and flowers on his left arm. He was ridiculously, stupidly attractive. It wasn’t fair at all.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yours too if you want to see,” a wicked little smirk flashed across Peeta’s features. “We could look at them together if you want to.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>The urge to either smack or kiss him again, but more expressive this time because she kind of wanted him to drag her down to the floor and have his way with her right then, came over Katniss. But if they did that, they would never get started on the sketching. And as surprising and maddening as this conversation had become, she’d made up her mind to pose for Peeta. Not to mention it was getting late, and she hadn’t eaten in hours. She was pretty much starving. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So you’ve already drawn me naked,” Katniss said, diverting her thoughts.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, that’s what I’m saying,” Peeta admitted. He was completely unrepentant- his eyes practically twinkled, if a thing like that were possible. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I probably could have guessed that- since you spend like half your time drawing. And the other half of the time, we’re naked a lot.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>He grinned widely at that. Even Katniss was impressed with her bluntness.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It does make for lots of inspiration, doesn’t it? Are there any particulars you want to know?” Peeta asked, moving towards her again. “Poses? Level of nudity?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss evaded him, taking a half-step back and putting her hand on his hard chest to halt him in place. She ignored how nice it felt to touch him, for the moment at least. “My only question is whether or not you brought me anything to eat. I’m going to need food for this. I need my strength.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, of course,” Peeta sounded distracted as he answered, so she followed the path his eyes had taken. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>It only took a moment to realize his eyes were lingering on her breasts now that he was no longer touching them. She crossed her arms over herself again, blocking most of his view, and Peeta sighed. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>He curled his fingers around her wrist like he was going to pull her arm away. “That’s not nice.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think it's necessary,” Katniss said primly. It was fun to tease him, but they would get nothing done if they kept going this way.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Maybe not. Fine- yes, of course, I brought you something to eat. It’s not like I just met you yesterday. You know I’m nothing if I’m not good at providing nourishment.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Before Katniss could get another word in, he moved into her and kissed her boldly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ah, Peeta was proving a point. She’d allow it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>With the taste of his mouth and their bodies pressed together, dragging her under, Peeta worked his hand beneath her arm. He gave her breasts a light squeeze, and she laughed against his mouth.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Just wait here for a minute, ” Peeta said, backing away and grinning triumphantly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta went to the tattoo shop’s backroom to grab his things but soon reappeared out front where Katniss was waiting for him. He carried a fluffy beige blanket and a pillow tucked under his arm. Over his shoulder, there was a full-looking tote bag with the end of a wine bottle peeking out of the top. The bag looked full.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ah, he’d brought plenty. Smart boy.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>On his way to rejoin her, Peeta paused at the light switch, turning the bright center lights off and leaving a few of the outer, softer bulbs burning. She realized he’d already dimmed the music volume, which funnily enough was still on what she dubbed his “dad” playlist from earlier. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>What constituted mood music differed from person to person, Katniss supposed. And it wasn’t like he was trying to seduce her. He was trying to make her comfortable.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What have you got in there?” she asked, indicating the tote bag as Peeta stooped down to spread the blanket on the floor. After he had it straightened according to his liking, he took her hand and tugged lightly, urging her to join him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss lowered herself next to him on the floor. Once settled, she grabbed the pillow, tucking the corners under her arms, using it as a cover for her chest.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Bread and cheese, some of that olive salad you like. Grapes,” Peeta said. “Brought you some wine too,” he added, pulling out two stemless glasses, tipping them towards her for show.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss raised her eyebrows in surprise. “Real glasses. Nice touch.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Only the best for you,” he said softly. His voice was light, but the truth behind it was there.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>It took Katniss a while to get used to Peeta and how he behaved as though she only deserved the best things. That, at least, wasn’t a confidence issue for her- it had more to do with Katniss being the type of person who typically neglected herself. She would have happily drank the wine from a paper cup and not thought anything about it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ooh, I saw that. Thank you,” Katniss told him shyly because Peeta”s hyper-focused care always flustered her a little. She tucked some loose hair behind her ears as he settled next to her on the plush blanket. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thought it might help you relax,” he admitted, his eyes raking over her body. He frowned a little at the way she’d covered her breasts again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss glanced down at her pillow-covered chest then back at him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I wish you wouldn’t do that,” Peeta remarked, nodding at it. His tone wasn’t accusatory, more like he thought he’d failed to make Katniss comfortable enough. “I don’t like it when you hide from me.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Just give me a minute to get used to it,” she promised, grabbing one of the plates he’d brought for them to use and then helping herself to the food while he waited. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>She filled her plate with rolls and cheese and a healthy amount of olives.  And of course, she realized as Peeta handed her a fork and linen napkin, he even brought real silverware for them to use. Why did he always have to be so extra? </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m not used to lounging around naked just for the heck of it. But this is nice,” Katniss reassured him as he handed her a glass of wine. “A girl could get used to this.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>As they began quietly eating, she thought about the effort Peeta put into such a small thing. Katniss knew what each of these little gestures meant- that her comfort was never going to be a small thing to him. He was always thinking about her.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>It was strange to think of how far they'd come. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta glanced over at her then, and she paused mid-chew to take him in, looking at her in that way he had of crashing through her barriers and peeling back each of her defenses. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey,” he said because he knew his words were too much for her to take sometimes.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Even in that way, giving her the breathing room she needed, he was generous.</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta’s openness, the way he just handed her his heart and trusted that she would keep it safe, never stopped surprising her. Katniss wondered if he was aware of just how much his trust in</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>her meant. She cupped the line of his jaw, his cheek and neck lightly bristled with white-blond hair; Peeta had skipped shaving today, something he didn’t typically do. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss leaned into him and just let their lips brush, her other hand going to the back of his head and raking through his silky blond waves. She tried to show him what he meant, even if she couldn’t say it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>Once she pulled back, and they sat, breathing each other in, Peeta’s fingers wrapped around the corner of the pillow. With no hesitation, she lifted her arms, and he took the barrier away.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading; let me know what you think if you're feeling it!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. The Night in Question, Part 3 (aka yes there's finally sex)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Part three of the section of the story I call The Night In Question, aka the night the slip-up happens that leads to their pregnancy.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“How are you doing over there?” Peeta asked, sounding distracted. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>To answer, Katniss roused herself out of the sleepy, inattentive state she’d fallen in. They’d been at this for a while. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m starting to get a little stiff,” she admitted, shifting her shoulders a bit and turning her head enough to look at him. She wasn’t too uncomfortable, though- she’d always been pretty limber. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Can you give me just a few more minutes?” Peeta met her eyes before his focus moved back down to the notepad. He frowned as if it was the paper’s fault his sketch wasn’t complete yet. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I hate to ask you, but I’m so close to being done with this part,” he said apologetically. “But if you need to get up-”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Go ahead,” Katniss told him. She didn’t want to draw him out of that working mental place if he wasn't ready to leave it. “I’m alright for a little bit longer. Do what you need to do.” Peeta had done such a thorough job of making her comfortable; she genuinely wanted him to get done what he could tonight. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>After they’d finished eating the picnic meal he brought along for them, with only a moderate amount of kissing to serve as a distraction, he packed the leftover food away. Next, he plugged a space heater in the corner where Katniss was sitting- something she hadn’t thought to consider but appreciated that Peeta had. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The longer Katniss sat in place, the more she realized she would’ve been unbearably cold if it hadn’t been for the small space heater. She had enough trouble staying warm even when she wasn’t sitting still, naked, for long periods. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Not Peeta. His body radiated heat like a furnace at all times, and she took full advantage of it.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The whole experience of posing was a lot different than she’d thought it would be. Even after Peeta settled Katniss in the position he wanted her, he was slow to start drawing. She assumed he would’ve dived right it but instead, he spent long minutes studying her body and focusing on parts of her she hadn’t anticipated he would. He took his time considering things like her elbow or the line of her jaw, even walking around her to look at her body’s position from different angles.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Eventually, Peeta sat down and began drawing. He started slow, but soon the flicks of his wrist and the sound of pencil on paper became consistent, increasing in speed the longer he worked until all she heard was a consistent scratch. Katniss caught herself glancing at him every few minutes at first, but when she realized how intense his focus was and how deep he’d gone inside his head, she decompressed mentally. Instead of watching him, she picked a spot on the far wall to focus on instead. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She found that posing for him, just like she would’ve eventually figured out if left to her own devices, wasn’t bad at all. Nothing about the experience felt uncomfortable or strange. Peeta barely looked at her, which helped, but it seemed like his eye was a clinical one when he did. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Something was freeing about sitting half-naked in a space where she wasn’t typically undressed- like a secret between the two of them, something no one else had to know. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The overall atmosphere inside the shop, dim lights, soft music streaming from the recessed speakers, the </span>
  <em>
    <span>scritching </span>
  </em>
  <span>sounds from Peeta’s pencil, and the occasional voices of people on the street leaking in through the shuttered front window had all combined with her full stomach. It left her in a tranquil, drowsy state. Katniss was on the floor with her bottom on the same pillow she’d briefly used to cover her bare breasts. Her back was to Peeta, her knees bent and tucked against her chest. She held her head tilted to the side, with her chin tucked against her bare shoulder. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta had unraveled her braid and combed it out before they started- he liked playing with her hair anyway. Now, whenever she moved her head, her hair slid across her back in a smooth, sensual glide; she might’ve even moved her head a few times just to feel it.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>As Peeta finished what he was doing, Katniss found herself focusing on how he was wiggling his toes. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He glanced up and caught her looking at him finally. “You’re very good at posing, ” he said, his lips turning up in the corners in amusement.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I can sit still for a long time if I’m stuck in my head,” Katniss answered, letting her eyes slip closed again. “I’ve been told I have a soothing aura.” She shifted slightly in an attempt to keep her back muscles loose. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“By who?” Peeta asked. He must’ve paused his sketching to ask because the </span>
  <em>
    <span>scritching</span>
  </em>
  <span> noise of pencil moving across the paper paused. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Prim,” Katniss told him. She couldn’t seem to force her eyes back open- it was as though she existed outside of her body at that moment, she felt so oddly relaxed. “Are you saying that’s not true? I think I’m very calming.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She heard Peeta’s pencil start moving again. “It’s more that I’m surprised you used the word </span>
  <em>
    <span>aura</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss laughed at that. “It’s not very on-brand for me, is it?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Just thought you might be tapping into your more sensitive side,” he said lightly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t have a sensitive side,” she murmured. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Lies, lies, lies. What Katniss should have said was that she had too many sensitive sides and that each of them made her shut down into a scowly, grump because everything felt like too much to handle most of the time. She rarely felt that way with Peeta, though. He just seemed to get her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>That was what terrified her about their relationship sometimes- she didn’t want to go back to not having a romantic partner who understood her that well.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Tonight she wasn’t scared, though. Tonight she was content and comfortable.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta didn’t reply. The way he remained silent told her he was off in his head again, so she left her eyes closed, allowing herself to float along in that half-unconscious state a while longer. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finally, though, the rustle of a closing book and the cessation of his moving pencil clued her in that he'd finished. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“All done for now,” Peeta announced.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When he spoke, Katniss opened her eyes for good and began to move, allowing herself to stretch. She twisted her neck and lengthened her back, just working the slight stiffness out of the joints. She stood up and moved her body some more to get the blood flowing in her limbs.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Once she finished limbering up, Peeta held his hand out to her. “Come see?” he asked, inviting her to sit beside him. He went so far as to pat the space on the floor at his side. “I need you to tell me what you think so far.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss went to him, settling on his left side. Once down, she leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder and draping her body across his. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>There was something almost unbearably intimate about touching each other this way, just existing at that moment together with her breasts brushing his arm and the warmth of his body pressed up against her bare skin. The still-running space heater didn't blow hot air this far, so she was glad for his natural heat. It was an excuse to get close, even if she needed one, which she didn’t.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss’s eyes were eye level with his neck; she watched Peeta swallow hard and had the urge to put her lips there. Did he feel that current running between them the same as her? Maybe it was what a freeing, surprisingly enjoyable experience modeling for him had turned out to be, or perhaps it was the teasing and kissing and touching her breasts Peeta had done earlier. It could have been the fact that they’d looked at each other half half-naked for hours now. Whatever it was, Katniss wanted him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Resisting the impulse to act on her urges, Katniss waited for Peeta to show her the sketchbook. She was the impatient one of the two of them, but she was trying to be less so. And besides, he’d </span>
  <em>
    <span>drawn</span>
  </em>
  <span> her. Of course, she was curious, even if the thought of knowing how Peeta saw her was anxiety-inducing, too. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Take a look,” he prompted, shifting next to her. Peeta got his arm around her back and scooched her closer. “Comfortable?” he asked, resting his chin against the top of her head. He cuddled close, his hand stroking her loose hair and down her bare arm. It was a light touch but maddening in the best way.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Katniss said. She leaned her head against his chest and let Peeta cradle her against his body. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Here it is,” Peeta said, handing her the book.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With her free hand, she flipped the book open in her lap. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her first reaction was confusion, surprised by the image in front of her. “Peeta,” she murmured, letting her fingers trace across the image in bewilderment; it wasn’t anything she’d been expecting. Not at all.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He laughed under his breath, pressing his lips against the crown of her head. “What do you think?” he asked, his voice muffled in her loose hair, his breath warming the top of her head. “It’s rough, and there’s a lot of background detail I want to include, but I think I got the basics of how I visualized you down.” The timbre of his voice sent a sharp zing down her spine. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s beautiful,” Katniss’s words caught in her throat, bewildered by the myriad of emotions overtaking her just from looking at his drawing. Peeta’s work completely overwhelmed her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The girl he’d drawn had long, silky black hair that seemed to reflect moonlight from techniques that just involved various pencil strokes. She had a delicate curving spine, and a beautiful face with lush lips and her chin tucked against her shoulder. The girl’s gaze (mentally, Katniss referred to his picture of her as the girl- she couldn’t wrap her mind around how that was supposed to be her) reflected an inner peace that she’d rarely felt in her life. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Somehow, Peeta captured those moments on paper that came to the surface so infrequently. She couldn’t believe he saw her that way, elegant and wise like some sort of lunar deity. “That’s not me,” she said, touching the corner of the paper. She didn’t believe a bit of it, but she still couldn’t tear her eyes away from the sketch and this fantasy girl that was supposed to be her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta laughed, bending his head to look at her. “Who do you think it is, then?” his warm breath tickling her neck. “I only draw what I see.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss ran her fingers down the corner of the page, ghosting over the edges of the ebony hair and luminescent skin, before closing the book and setting it carefully aside. She couldn’t look at that picture any longer, not with the way it made her feel. Everything was overwhelming her, becoming too much. She wasn’t going to allow herself to cry over it- Peeta had already turned so many of her emotions back on, she wasn’t going to start crying in front of him over a sketch. It was just that she couldn’t wrap her head around that image of her he’d created. It didn’t portray her as perfect, but it made her seem beautiful. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>How could she ever tell him how much it meant that he saw her that way?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Give me a little time,” Peeta began, mistaking her ongoing silence for some sort of discontent with what he’d drawn, “and I can do even better than that. Wait till you see the wall-”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He didn’t get another word in because Katniss was climbing into his lap, cutting him off with her lips. Her arms encircled his neck at the same time her knees caged in his hips. With no warning, she caught his mouth with hers and kissed him hotly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>To Peeta’s credit, there was no hesitation in his response- his muscles tensed for maybe a microsecond before melting beneath the force of desire from her, groaning low in the back of his throat as she pressed herself against him. He moved his whole body into her kiss, big hands looping around her upper thighs and tugging her closer, leaving no space wasted between them as they explored each other’s mouths, open and deep, trying to fuse into a mess of limbs and bodies and passion.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Every emotion Peeta brought out tonight, every good thing he made Katniss feel, want, realize, or become aware of, had converged on her at once. She had to touch him everywhere. Her hands were in his hair, on his jaw, his face, his shoulders, and those gorgeous arms. Any place she could reach while kissing him because she couldn’t seem to make herself stop. She needed to show him that the way he sees her means everything, skin to skin with him, heart to heart. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta moaned her name, his voice catching in her ear as Katniss moved her lips down to suck on his neck. His abdominal muscles fluttered against hers as she pressed against him, a match to the way her body trembled for his, his tight, warm skin against her softer body.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>After tasting the sweat on his neck, she returned to Peeta’s mouth and rubbed her center against his erection, wanting to make them both feel good. She kissed him, permeating his mouth while Peeta’s hands roamed up her thighs to her ass, her back, her shoulders, before tangling in her hair. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When he tugged on the dark strands thoughtlessly, she grunted at the pleasure it sent racing down her spine, ending in an intense ache between her legs. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss tore her mouth from his and dropped her hands between their bodies, her knuckles grazing the hard plane of his abdomen as she reached between them to undo his pants. Peeta’s chin dropped so he could watch, his breathing stilted with anticipation, his stomach quivering as she popped the button of his fly. He groaned a little, quietly, but not unnoticed by her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss loved the noises he made when she touched him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta sucked in his breath as she pulled the waistband of his pants back and tugged his zipper down, careful not to graze his erection. Once she had the fly parted, Katniss pressed her lips against his ear, whispering, “lay down,” as she ran her finger inside the waistband of his underwear. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Once he was on his back, Katniss paused, looking her fill of him from her place on her knees beside him. His handsome face was expectant, his eyelids heavy. His lips were parted, wet, and swollen- he was wholly disheveled and eager for her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss crawled up his prone body, lowering herself to straddle his midsection. Peeta exhaled at the added weight, and she bit back a smile. She used a light grasp to force his arms up and over his head where she wanted them, lengthening his spine and flexing all those muscles in his arms and chest so she could look at him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta was happy to go along with her-if the way his cock twitched against her backside when she brushed against him was any indication. He stared up at Katniss as she hovered over him, those pretty blue eyes roving her features the same way she was his. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s my turn to look at you now,” she breathed out, emboldened by the events of the evening. It only seemed fair she had her turn. “So don’t move. Okay?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Whatever you want,” Peeta whispered. He was so gorgeous with that warm smile and his hard, inked body. Katniss traced her fingers over the vining tattoos creeping up his sides. She slid down him, pausing long enough to let him nuzzle against her breasts and breathe her in, and then further down his body until she was straddling his legs. She immediately tugged on the waistband of his pants, so he lifted his hips in compliance with her unspoken request.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss knelt beside him and eased his shorts off first. When he was just in his underwear, she reached for his prosthesis and unbuckled it. She took that off, followed by the silicone sleeve. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>After setting it to the side, Katniss rubbed circles where his leg ended below the knee with the heel of her hand, applying firm pressure. His nerve endings had damage at the amputation site, so it took a hard touch for him to feel enough intensity there to counteract the ache. She wanted him to be comfortable.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta watched, moving his hands behind his head and propping himself up to get a better view of Katniss and what she was doing. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Was the bionic leg getting uncomfortable?” Katniss teased once she was done, leaning over him, her lips hovering above his. She pecked a kiss on his lips because she couldn’t resist</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“A little,” Peeta admitted. “Wasn’t sure when I’d need to get up again.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, you don't have to go anywhere right now,” she said, sitting back. Peeta’s breath caught when she pulled his underwear over his hips and worked them off his legs.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You should have taken it off sooner,” Katniss scolded, laying kisses on his chest once he was completely naked beneath her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Probably. Ugh,” Peeta’s words ended in a groan, front teeth digging into his lower lip as she went lower. He, probably unaware he was doing it, was lifting himself into the touch of her lips as she worked her way down his body like he was chasing the weight of her mouth on his skin, silently begging for more of her touch. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Once she made it past his navel, Katniss ran her hands over his slim hips, letting her fingers trace over the vines and leaves imprinted on his skin there. Finally, she took his hard cock in hand, pulling it away from where he lay hot and smooth against his stomach. Just looking at him like this made her ache. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta’s hips jerked reflexively. He whimpered when she bent and licked a line around the crown of his cock, before taking him slightly deeper as her hand slid up and down his length, humming as she squeezed the thick base, before dragging her lips up the shaft again. Katniss rubbed her thighs together for some relief from the tingling, wet clenching her walls were already doing. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta shuddered when she skimmed over an extra-sensitive spot on his cock. He whimpered, lifting his hips off the floor, and she ran a hand beneath his thighs and dug her fingers into his ass enthusiastically. He drove her crazy, bringing out a wildness in her that wanted to consume him whole.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Katniss,” he panted her name, “I can’t… just slow down. I don’t want to come yet. Let me-” Peeta’s hands went to the sides of her head, gently pushing her mouth off of him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When she moved back, he scrambled to sit up, reaching for her and rolling them over so she was flat on her back and he was hovering over her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta stared down at her. “You’re so fucking pretty,” he whispered, his eyes raking over her face. His hands went to her waist, and they got the rest of her clothes off. When she was naked, too, he brushed her long, loose hair away from her face before dragging his hands across her skin in a way that made her arch into him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta’s lips dropped to her neck, kissing her skin lightly. He moved further down, slowly, dipping his tongue into the divot made where her neck and shoulder joined together. Further down, moving across her sternum, dragging his nose along too, nuzzling his way down her body, breathing her in. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You smell fantastic,” he said when his nose was against the smooth skin between her breasts. He turned his head, rubbing the side of his face against her self swells. The bristle was ticklish but arousing. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He was still breathing hard from the way she’d gone down on him, aroused, she knew, but he would take his time with her. That’s just how Peeta was. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hm,” he breathed out, like the scent of her skin was heaven, “I could live here.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“We’d have to go to work sometime. You can’t stay there forever,” Katniss whispered, before groaning at herself. She would have smacked her forehead for her clumsy words- if she had the will to lift her arms high enough to reach her face. But Peeta had her caged in beneath his muscular body and those ridiculously sexy arms of </span>
  <em>
    <span>his</span>
  </em>
  <span>, so she didn’t. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He made a low rumble in the back of his throat. “Not for a week or two at least- not until I could break my record for how many times I can make you come.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss laughed quietly, watching him dip his head to peck little kisses around her nipples. He kept his eyes closed as if worshipping her body was the only thing he could see himself doing for the foreseeable future. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, I guess we could put in for vacation time,” she managed, gasping when he flicked her nipples with his tongue- the sensation soaked through her whole body.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta perched on his knees between her legs, the weight of his body grounding, hovering above her but not allowing their lower halves to touch anywhere. He spent an excessive amount of time on her breasts, licking and sucking until she was panting beneath him. Her inner walls twitched and clenched, her clit begging for attention. With the way the tension in her belly was building, Katniss wondered if it was possible to orgasm just from breast play. She’d never experienced it, but If Peeta didn’t stop what he was doing soon, she had a feeling she was about to find out. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Peeta,” Katniss ran her fingers into his blond waves, tugging on the strands until he paused what he was doing, pulling his mouth away from her reddened nipple- she would probably be sore tomorrow. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She couldn’t find it in herself to care. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Please,” her hips squirmed against the floor, searching for relief. She needed something, whether it was Peeta’s fingers, tongue, or cock. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta laughed under his breath. “Please what?” his voice had a hint of gravel to it.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You know,” Katniss whined, her voice thin. Even her throat muscles were clenched tight against the tension threading its way through her veins. She was tightly coiled, ready to spring apart.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta glanced up at her; his lids were heavy and pupils wide. Their eyes connected and electricity crackled in the space between them. “Say it then,” he said, his hand sliding down her body and resting on her thigh. His touch was phantom-like, light but possessive. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss bit her lip in surprise-this was new. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Why?” she asked.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He shrugged, a sexy shift of his muscled, tattoo-edged shoulders. Dammit, why did he have to be so attractive? It should be forbidden. She couldn’t resist anything about him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I want to hear you say the words,” he told her, staring at her lips. “I want you to tell me.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He wanted her to talk dirty to him? It only took her a second to decide she would give him the shock of his life and play along- the idea was thrilling. “What words do you want me to say, Peeta?” she asked him, hearing the breathiness in her voice.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Guess,” he said, smirking, his eyes dropping to her mouth. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She watched him lick his lips. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I think you know,” he added. “Or use your imagination.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It amazed her, the things Peeta got her to do eagerly. Katniss wanted him to feel even a measure of what he did to her- and this seemed to be was the only way her tongue would ever come unwound. “Pussy,” Katniss asked, her lips forming the word agonizingly slow. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta’s eyes dropped to her mouth, riveted by each movement of her lips. He hadn’t expected her to go along with his request without argument, and they both knew it. She waited until she knew he was focused entirely on her lips to finish the sentence. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was too fun to tease him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you want me to talk about my pussy, Peeta?” she asked innocently.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>His nostrils flared at the same time she felt his hips twitch between her thighs, but he remained silent, enthralled.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It made her bolder, and she lifted her legs to wrap around him, winding her calves around his thighs, opening herself beneath him like a flower spreading its petals apart. “Or should I tell you how much I like it when you lick my pussy- or suck on my clit?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>That time there was a definite cock-rub, hot and hard, against the delicate skin of her belly. It made her shiver.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Or do you want me to talk about your cock?” Katniss went on, somehow maintaining her nerve as she dug her heel into the back of his legs. He looked up then; she stared him dead in the eye. “How good it feels when you fuck my pussy with your big, </span>
  <em>
    <span>hard</span>
  </em>
  <span> cock?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She felt real triumph when Peeta shuddered, but then he was disappearing down her body, so quick her legs dropped like lead- but he caught them. He pushed her knees up and apart until he’d tipped her hips up and left her body fully exposed to his eyes. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her clit throbbed a frantic pulse, and Peeta muttered something indiscernible before propping himself up and burying his face between her thighs. His tongue glided through her folds and circled her opening before sliding it inside her pussy, so deep she could feel his lips against her folds. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She whimpered; it was amazing. Her walls twitched around Peeta’s tongue as he moaned against her. Katniss grunted, the pleasure of his onslaught warring against the need to orgasm. She tried to arch her hips to get some relief for the pressure behind her clit, maybe the bridge of his nose- she wasn’t sure what she would get at that point- but Peeta held her down and open with his forearm. She couldn’t move, made to take whatever he wanted to give.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss dug her fingers into Peeta’s hair as the tension wound deeper and tighter. It was the most decadent, maddening thing she’d ever experienced in her life after the hours of building sexual tension between them- posing for him had been the most effective foreplay of her life. “Yes, </span>
  <em>
    <span>god</span>
  </em>
  <span>, yes,” she whined, swirling her hips against his face, “please.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta pulled away, breathing hard. She could see the way his lips were glistening from her. “Say it again,” he growled like a man possessed, “tell me what you want.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss’s head rolled back and forth against the floor, out of her mind with need. Her pussy fluttered, missing his ministrations. She needed the release. “Peeta, please,” she managed, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>please</span>
  </em>
  <span> touch my clit. Lick it, suck me.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He swore, moving his hand up to her mound and dipping his thumb inside. He brushed her clit, and the pressure of his hand against her pelvis made her body feel grounded, even as a jolt of pleasure rocked her nerves like the opening act before the big show. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her whole body seemed to fall apart and go liquid from the relief of him touching her, even if the withheld release was still so agonizing.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I can’t wait for you to come on my face,” Peeta panted out, breathing against her folds.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Unh,” Katniss moaned, writhing beneath him. “Please.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta took pity on her, dragging first one leg and then the other over his shoulders before laying on his stomach. He used his fingers to spread her lips apart and went to her clit, lightly tonguing it, a teasing sensation that made her nerves itch because it. Wasn’t. Enough.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“More,” she whined, throwing her head back and squeezing her eyes tight.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He flicked his tongue across and around the sensitive nub while his fingers worked below.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes,” Katniss squealed as her body tensed on the edge of release. “Just like that- </span>
  <em>
    <span>Peeta</span>
  </em>
  <span>! Yes, yes-”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her walls clamped as the orgasm washed over her. As her body tensed then released, she pulled Peeta’s hair tight between her fingers, locking her thighs around his ears and arching into his mouth. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When the wave of pleasure was over, and she was coming down, she tried to move her legs away from his head, but Peeta wouldn’t let her budge, licking her like he was urging her to keep coming against his mouth.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Come up here,” Katniss gasped, lifting her head off the floor just far enough to stare at the top of his gorgeous blond head planted between her thighs, his tattooed arms and shoulders tensed and poised between her legs. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Just looking at him, pleasuring her that way, drove her crazy. She needed him inside of her; she wanted him to take the lead, bend her and contort her body and fill her up. “Come and fuck me, please.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta looked up, shaking his head regretfully- face flushed and eyes wild, his mouth wet from her. “I didn’t bring any condoms. I forgot to grab any,” he admitted regretfully. “Guess I wasn’t thinking.” He ran his fingers through her wet folds again, causing small tremblings to rock her inner thighs. His tongue darted out and through her. “We’ll just have to do this.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She thumped her head against the floor in frustration. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Can’t you just- </span>
  <em>
    <span>Peeta-” </span>
  </em>
  <span>her words dropped off as he flicked his tongue over her clit again. Quickly, she refocused- he would have her completely distracted if he kept that up. With the way he’d made her feel tonight, and it wasn’t just the sex- it was the teasing, and the picnic, and the care he showed for her, the way he’d drawn her so beautifully, all of it- she wanted to be closer to him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss knew she wasn’t going to be satisfied with oral. She wanted him inside of her, one with her. “Can’t you just pull out or something? I want </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She must’ve done a good enough job of convincing him, or maybe it didn’t take much convincing at all, because Peeta crawled up her body. He kissed her deeply, stroking into her mouth as he rubbed his cock against her wet folds. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Please, Peeta, please fuck me,” she whispered.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>In answer, Peeta grabbed her leg and wrapped her thigh around his hip- the movement spread her wide open beneath him. It was always a little tight at first, but Katniss was so slippery from the orgasm that Peeta had no trouble pushing his cock inside her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He moved slowly, his mouth hanging open at the feel of her barrierless- they’d never had sex this way before.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss leaned up into Peeta’s mouth, kissing him passionately before letting her head fall back again, closing her eyes just to experience him inside her and surrounding her. He sat up a little, his chest just hovering over hers as he began to thrust inside her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss was hyper-aware of everything he was doing: his fingers digging into her thigh held up and out, his arm holding him up above her, the brush of his masculine, hairy legs between hers, his lightly furred stomach, the controlled power in his tensed muscles, and the way his cock moved through her walls. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her hips jerked a little, and her breasts bounced a little as Peeta thrust inside of her. Usually, she liked to move against him, but she wanted to experience everything about him making love to her for now. She was such a goner.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It feels so good,” Katniss said, cupping his cheek tenderly.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta’s face was tense, concentrated, as he hovered over her body. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was funny- Katniss felt like she could easily climax again with the way his cock was brushing against her front wall, the feeling building in intensity. Her heart was so full of emotion (and something else she wasn’t ready to admit yet) for him, she didn’t care whether or not she did.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peeta slowly pulled the rest of the way out. He propped himself up with one arm and urged Katniss to move first one foot and then the other up his chest and rest her legs against his chest, stretching her lower half out fully. He leaned over and quickly pushed his cock inside her again. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They both groaned as he moved forward. With Katniss’s pelvis lifted and tilted up, it allowed Peeta to slide so deep inside she felt every hard inch of him. His sack brushed against her perineum with each shallow thrust. Combined with the way her legs were so close together that it clamped her walls around his pistoning cock, everything he was doing was sinfully good. The angle was perfect, his pelvic bone brushing against her clit as he moved in and out; Katniss didn’t think she’d need to touch herself to come again.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re so perfect, tight,” Peeta mumbled, eyes hazy and unfocused. He seemed to be having trouble focusing.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You feel so big and hard- so good,” she told him, holding back a gasp at the way the pressure was building low in her belly again, the way her body was tensing and tightening. “I love the way you fuck me.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Lift your arms,” Peeta asked, thrusting particularly hard with a boldness brought on by her response. “I want to see your tits bounce, Katniss.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss stretched her arms out above her head, linking her hands together. “Like this?” she actually heard herself purr in response to him, like some sort of sex kitten. Who was this person she’d become? It was amazing what he did to her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Either way, she was getting close.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Just like that,” Peeta breathed out, his eyes on her breasts. He thrust hard again, jarring her against the carpeted floor. She couldn’t find it in herself to care that she might very well have rug burn before they were done. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Fuck yes,” he praised her, “just look at you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Katniss closed her eyes, the pleasurable sensation getting to be too much to keep them open any longer. Her head rolled back side to side on the floor.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you close?” he asked.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Mhm, yes,” Katniss moaned, her eyes slipping open and locking on him. Peeta was so gorgeous above her- biting his lip, lost in the pleasure that was her body, she grabbed his face and pulled him down to kiss her. She couldn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>not</span>
  </em>
  <span> do it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When Peeta leaned over her, his pelvic bone caught at just the right angle against her clit and brought on her orgasm. Katniss cried into his mouth, her walls clamping around his cock as pleasure erupted between her thighs, rushing through her veins like a drug. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Distantly she heard Peeta grunt against her pleasure-slackened lips. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Then he was tearing himself away from her lips and out of her body, shoving her legs apart, and thrusting his cock against her belly, gasping as warm spurts of his semen painted her stomach while she arched and throbbed beneath him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Okay, so maybe they hadn’t used a condom </span>
  <em>
    <span>every</span>
  </em>
  <span> time if she really considered it.</span>
</p>
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</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>The next chapter picks up in the present timeline- beginning the morning after Chapter Five.</p>
<p>Thanks for reading, let me know what you thought!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>This chapter picks up the morning after Chapter Five, in the present time period. There's some plot. There's some sex. </p><p>Hey, Katniss fell asleep sooner than she meant to last night. And they confessed their love to each other, so, of course, there needs to be some sexy times between them. </p><p>Yes, I know they just did it in the last chapter, and no, I have no self-control. Yes, the sex is (somewhat, maybe?) important to the plot. </p><p>Anyway- I hope you enjoy this chapter and expect more plot, less banging, next go-round.</p><p>Thank you, jroseley, for betaing this chapter for me!</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Katniss opened her eyes, roused from sleep by the sensation of the mattress flattening under the weight of its new occupant. The bed itself was unfamiliar, but it only took a second to remember where she was- Peeta’s dad’s guest room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her body felt heavy, her limbs weighted. She couldn’t believe she’d slept so soundly in a strange bed- it wasn’t the norm for her, but Peeta was with her last night, so she supposed that made the difference. She always slept better with him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Rolling onto her side, she caught him watching her, his gaze steady. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, sleepy,” Peeta said, reaching for her calf and rubbing it through the blanket.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” Katniss mumbled, rubbing her eyes, trying to adjust to the light streaming in through the windows. She had to wonder how long she’d slept; it didn’t seem very late based on the sun’s position in the sky.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Peeta pulled a mock-scolding look, squeezing her leg, trapped her in place when she squirmed grumpily to get out of his hold. “I can’t believe you slept in so late- I’ve been up for hours.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She blinked at him owlishly until he smirked at her. “You’re such a liar,” Katniss said flatly, stretching under the blanket. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’d clearly not been up very long- his hair was rumpled, and he was still wearing his sweatpants, his muscular torso and arms on full display. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was wearing his t-shirt herself, which she vaguely remembered him helping her into last night. She’d hardly been able to keep her eyes open as they climbed in bed together; she’d felt so tired. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Peeta shrugged. “You got me. I’ve only been up a little bit.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Knew it, ” she jerked her leg away from his touch in mock-disgust. He caught her by the ankle, holding on, teasing her a little longer before he finally let go.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You love me anyway,” Peeta said as if he’d told her he loved her every day of his life- and not at all like this was only the second day she knew he was in love with her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it was. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Peeta loves me.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah,” Katniss admitted, running her fingers across the slick surface of the cotton sheets, “maybe a little bit.” Her eyes darted to his while her head remained on the pillow. They watched each other, and she reflected on yesterday and what it’d meant in their relationship. Peeta told her he was in love with her- and, god, she loved him with an intensity that almost hurt. And today, her hang-ups be damned, there was a whole other layer to their relationship, a deeper connection.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He studied her contemplatively, finally breaking the silence that’d fallen over the room. “Are you alright this morning? You seemed upset last night- and you never did tell me what was bothering you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Last night</span>
  </em>
  <span>- Katniss frowned at the memory of crying in Peeta’s arms on his dad’s couch. She didn’t have the slightest idea what had triggered that embarrassing scene in the first place. The concerned look in her boyfriend’s eyes right now wasn’t making her feel any better. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn’t like that kind of scrutiny- she’d prefer to pull the blankets over her head and hide instead of talking about it. That crying jag breakdown she’d had simply made no sense. It was like those raw feelings she had about everything, and typically did an excellent job of hiding beneath the surface, came bubbling back up the way a body would in a shallow grave. She’d just as soon keep them dead and buried, thank you.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, I’m okay now,” Katniss said. There was no reason to be so embarrassed. Peeta loved her, and a part of her knew she shouldn’t want to hide things from him. Something held her back, though, probably the fear he’d run off screaming if he ever found out exactly how needy and sensitive she could be. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Somethings were better kept to herself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Probably just hormones or something.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you sure?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah- I’m sure.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Because you can tell me anything.” Peeta shifted on the bed, moving closer to her. “I wish you’d tell me more about what’s on your mind- whatever you’re thinking. I know I talk enough for both of us, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want you to talk. I’ll try to shut up if that would help.”</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>“Peeta-” Katniss began, trying not to laugh at him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They both knew his chattiness wasn’t an issue. Katniss appreciated how he tried to lighten the mood whenever it grew solemn, the effort he put into her comfort, instead of getting angry over her reluctance to open up. He just let her exist with him as she was and didn’t press her into talking about things she could not broach yet. He tried to make things easier for her when the words wouldn’t come. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And it wasn’t like she didn’t tell him things because she did. It was just that reluctance to let him see all of her weaknesses, laid out in an ugly, pathetic little line.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She sighed. “It was nothing. I don’t know why I was crying either.” Katniss finished, mostly telling the truth. She didn’t know exactly why she’d been so upset last night, even if the things that slipped while she cried in his arms were her real fears. She kind of hoped he’d forget what she told him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay,” Peeta said at last, even if that concerned look on his face wasn’t entirely gone. He dropped the subject, anyway.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss sat up. Because it was cool in the bedroom with the cracked window, she pulled the covers up and over her shoulders, settling cross-legged on the mattress. She tucked her chin into the blanket so it would stay in place. “What time is it anyway?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“About seven-thirty.” Peeta reached for her, smoothing her long hair from her face and brushing his knuckles across her cheek tenderly. The gesture was so sweet she had to fight the urge to rub her face against his hand like a cat. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>What a love-sick idiot she was. The watchful way he had of looking at her didn’t help, either. She had to put all that crazy thinking out of her head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“When are we supposed to be at your uncle’s?” Katniss asked, switching back to more rational things. It was cozy under the blanket, but she had to pee, and the pressure on her bladder was getting worse. She would have to get up soon, whether she needed to start getting ready or not.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We’ve got a couple of hours until we have to leave,” Peeta said, moving a little closer to her and resting his hand on her knee. “Do you need much time?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She could feel him working the blanket up stealthily, balling the material in his fist as he went like she wasn’t going to notice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Or will a quick shower work? I had an idea for something else we could do to pass the time till then. If you’re up to it,” he grinned at her, his handsome face lighting up irresistibly. “I know a way to make you feel better.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh yeah?” Katniss snickered under her breath as he moved closer to her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah- I’m just thinking of your well-being,” he said, kissing her cheek, his lips soft against her skin, “I love you. I want you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She bit back a smile. “Yeah?” Not that she wasn’t on board with the idea of some wake-up sex. Last night she’d been exhausted, but that felt like it was ages ago. She wasn’t tired anymore. “Well, maybe I want you back.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And you love me too,” Peeta added, kissing the sensitive spot just below her ear.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re right- I do,” she admitted. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He’d inched the blanket up far enough now that his hand was on her bare knee and them moving up her leg.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss let the covers fall from her shoulders as he moved closer. The desire between them was unmistakable, filling the relaxed quiet of the room. Peeta leaned in, smelling like toothpaste and traces of yesterday’s cologne. He skimmed his fingers along her neck and into her sleep-tangled hair. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before he got any farther, though, she felt the need to hit the pause button- briefly. She pulled away as he grazed her lips. “Let me take care of some stuff first,” she said, placing a finger on his lips in promise. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He might not care about kissing her with her morning breath, but she kind of did. </span>
</p><p> </p><p><span>“Keep these</span> <span>ready</span> <span>for</span> <span>me?”</span></p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>They skipped most of the foreplay and went right for home. The bedroom was flooded with soft, morning light when Katniss came back to it; the sun had risen enough that morning light was peeking in under the blinds. Still, Peeta’s welcoming smile was warmer. Loving. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Finding him there, waiting under the covers naked and hard, was all Katniss needed to bring that pent-up want from yesterday tearing back to the surface. A part of her felt like crying like the night before, but this time from some lighter emotion. Damn sentimental idiot Peeta’d turned her into, anyway.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He tugged on her hand when she came close to the bed, enticing her to climb under the blankets with him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Once her head hit the pillow, he didn’t hesitate to pull her into a drugging kiss. Katniss whimpered at the affection and raw sexuality behind everything he was doing- the two didn’t seem like they ought to be so intertwined together, but they were. She’d never had anyone both love and want her like that. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The full feeling in her chest only made things sexier, electric, as he ran his hand up her thigh and beneath the hem of her shirt (she’d left her underwear in the bathroom), kissing her deeply as he caressed her body. But Katniss supposed that’s how it was? She’d never been in love before, so she could only assume. Love made each touch special. It made the desire burn hotter.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta pulled her farther under with each lazy, deep kiss. She was melting into his heat, the touch of his naked skin on her. His erection pressed against her hip, and he stroked her tongue with his. He ran his hands over her sensitive skin, heightening the ache for him.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss arched into his body as he swallowed up her soft moans like those noises she made were the only thing he wanted to consume for the rest of his life. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta pushed her shirt up over her hips, running his hand down her ass and tugging her close, long fingers irresistibly pressing into her skin. She looped her leg over his thigh as he dipped his fingers inside her lips to test her, palm pressing against her bottom as he touched her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His breath caught in the back of his throat at the slickness he found. “You’re so ready for me, aren’t you?” he mumbled. “That’s very sexy.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss whined, pressing back on his hand for more stimulation. She loved it when he talked like that. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He urged her onto her stomach, with a gentle prod at her hip and then on her knees. Once she was in place, he stretched across her back and pressed kisses to the delicate spot at her hairline, moving further down to her shoulder blades, his mouth wet and hot against her skin, his body brushing against hers deliciously. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When Katniss rubbed against his erection, Peeta exhaled, his breath rushing out in ragged praise. He sat up, and grabbed one of the condoms he’d left on the bedside table, tore open the package, and rolled it on himself before moving behind her again. He rubbed the end of his cock through her folds, lubricating himself but also teasing her with it until she growled at him in aggravation. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Finally, he gave in.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Shit Katniss, you feel so good,” Peeta groaned against her ear, his breath a hot rush that sent shivers down her spine. He pushed into her slowly, the broad crown of his cock rubbing her walls as he sunk into her tight heat, seating himself deep inside her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss’s chin dropped against her chest, and her back bent in supplication to him to take her where she wanted to go. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply, overwhelmed by his body curled around her, legs pressed against the back of hers, his pelvis against her ass, full of his cock. She pushed against his hips, eager for Peeta to start moving. It was brutal remaining so still when she was this aroused.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He resisted, though. “Stretch out, Kat,” Peeta murmured, raking his nails down her spine. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She shuddered at the pinpricks of pleasure.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Moving his hand to the space between her shoulder blades, Peeta gently pushed her upper half down to the mattress, urging her to raise her hips at the same time she was lowering her shoulders. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Once her chest was against the bed, she turned her face into the pillow and laid her cheek against the cool cotton. Her forearms supported her on the bed, her ass in the air. They hadn’t even taken her shirt off. There was something about having the top half of her body covered while her lower half was naked and on display that was very appealing. Some deeply-buried exhibitionist tendencies came out of her in their sex life, and that side was laughably different than the Katniss who existed outside the bedroom.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss closed her eyes in bliss when Peeta began to move inside her. His hand slid beneath her shirt. He rubbed her back, thrusting slowly, sliding his cock in and out of her. His hips rolled into her ass with each motion.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Feel good?” he asked, his voice thick. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” she sighed, pressing back on his cock and grinding against him. What he was doing felt fantastic, but she wanted more. Since Peeta insisted on going slow, she took him deeper to stimulate her g-spot. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He swore under his breath, hips stiffening against the soft swells of her ass. He ran his hand down her side to dig into her side, stilling her hips like her pussy enveloping him to the root was too much.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss turned her face, grinning against the pillow where he couldn’t see. She loved making him come undone, too. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So good,” she promised, squeezing him again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Fuck,” Peeta grunted, no longer able to keep the sounds he made under his breath. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss was getting wetter, pressure building at the base of her spine. Despite that, she wasn’t in any sort of rush to get to the end. She wanted Peeta to feel as good as she did with him deep inside her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He leaned over her then, his firm stomach against her back, pressing her hips down into the bed with the rest of her body. He supported himself, those tightly muscled arms Katniss loved so much propping him up on either side so he wouldn’t be too much for her smaller frame to take. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His breath steamed in her ear, tickling the side of her neck as she squirmed beneath him. He spoke in waves, punctuated by the roll of his hips. “You know- I want to stay like this with you forever.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Something incoherent came from her mouth because, yes, she felt the same, and no, there were no words fit to express that. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta, twice her size, weighing her down, didn’t feel like too much. He’d never crush her- Katniss wanted all of him, covering her with his body and his love. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He stilled long enough to grind his hips into her, twisting them in a way that made her groan. The inner stimulation and against the backs of her thighs and bottom drew a moan of appreciation. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss dropped her hips lower, and he followed her down, buried inside of her. Deep, coiling tension made her tense around him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta stayed half-draped over her back, hard-muscled thighs between her legs. His hips slapped against her ass as he drove into her, fucking her harder, drilling her into the bed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She shrieked because it was just too much.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss pressed back, as much as she could lift her hips, and ground against his pelvis and on his cock in response to his maddening pace. Sparks shot through her belly, and answering wetness seeped between her thighs. The pressure behind her clit became too much when he began pushing into her with jerkier snaps. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss couldn’t take anymore. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her arousal soaked both of them, dripping relentlessly from her, running between her thighs, soaking their legs and her ass and his pelvis- not to mention the sheets beneath them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They were squishing, for fuck’s sake, and she was right on the verge of coming hard. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hang on,” she begged Peeta, “I need to-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When he paused, she pushed up into his hips, and he moved back for her, giving her the room to snake her hand between her legs. She rubbed small circles, biting her lip, jerking against her hand at the relief it brought. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Once Katniss found her rhythm, Peeta started moving again- without pressing her hips so deeply into the mattress so she could continue to touch herself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was only moments later that she squeezed her eyes tight, arched her back, and gasped into the pillow as her orgasm broke loose. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She tightened around his cock, mouth hanging open in bliss, and bore down on him, rocking her hips into him to stimulate her g-spot, fucking him relentlessly the way he’d fucked her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta swore, grinding into her tight, hot walls like he was trying to fuse their bodies until they combusted in heat and pleasure.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss dropped her hips to the bed again, boneless. Her hand got pinned between her clit and the mattress. Even with her fingers trapped, unable to move them, the pressure against her nerve bundle every time he rocked into her from behind had her moaning. She was oversensitive after her orgasm, twitching beneath him, but it felt so good she let herself ride the buzz, her body a live wire.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta seemed to be reveling in her walls tremoring around him as aftershocks jolted through her pelvis. Her second orgasm rolled in on the heels of her first, and it proved to be his undoing. He pushed hard, two, three more times before his hips seized up behind her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He made a gurgling sound, she felt his cock jerk, and then he was coming inside her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He slowed the motion of his hips as he came down, moving inside her with leisurely pumps, savoring the feel of her clenching and unclenching around him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When he’d finished, Peeta laid on top of her, muffling a sigh between her shoulder blades, his hot breath soaking through the shirt she still had on. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think you killed me,” he gasped, a panting mess.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She was a panting mess. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>In fact, Katniss was sure she’d squirted at some point because the bed was soaked. The wet spot they were laying on seemed to stretch forever, taking up an alarmingly large portion of the sheet beneath them. That had never happened to her before.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She hadn’t realized her body was capable of that. Not that she was complaining- not with the intensity of what just happened - </span>
  <em>
    <span>god</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but how mortifying that it had to have been on Peeta’s dad’s guest-room bed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She hoped there was a great mattress pad beneath the fitted sheet, or she was never coming back to see his family again. She couldn’t live with that kind of mortification.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Maybe she’d join the witness protection program and make Peeta leave the country with her. Okay, that was a tad dramatic, but still. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What the hell was that?” Peeta laughed as he moved off of her and flopped on the bed. He flinched when his side hit the wet spot, though,  and immediately propped himself up on his elbow to look down at the sheet. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss waited for his reaction, nervous about what he would think. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta was quiet like he was considering the facts. Katniss knew the same moment the realization hit him; he looked up at her, and his eyes were round as dinner plates. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He seemed entirely awed by the evidence of just how good of a time she’d had. “Did you-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think so,” she whispered, her cheeks flushing with a dull heat. Something about the bald, no-way-to-hide-it fact that Peeta had made her feel so good, in fact, that she fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>squirted</span>
  </em>
  <span> was too much.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Have you ever done that before?” he asked, sounding casual as he lay back on a drier spot and pulled the spent condom off his cock. He tied the end off, laying it on the mattress beside him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She watched him sit up out of the corner of her eye. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No,” Katniss admitted, getting up herself. “I didn’t know I could, ah, do that.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Huh.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katniss glanced up to find Peeta looking so smug she couldn’t help the snort that escaped from her lips. “Pretty proud of that, aren’t you?” she asked him dryly, some of that tension releasing its hold on her chest.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” he answered, and when they both laughed, she felt better.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peeta swung his legs over the edge of the bed then, turning away from her as he reached for the silicone sleeve lying on the bedside table. While they talked, he fitted it and his leg back in place. “Why don’t you get in the shower, and I’ll throw the sheets in the washer while you’re in?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sounds good,” Katniss answered, her back to him as she discretely dabbed the space between her legs and down her thigh, using the underwear she’d found lying at the foot of the mattress. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She still felt… a little squishy and didn’t want to drip on the bedroom carpet. After she’d contained the mess a little, Katniss tossed the boxer-briefs back on the wrecked sheets- might as well wash those too. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Putting the anxiety out of her head, she moved to Peeta’s side of the bed. She stood between his splayed legs and lay her head on top of his, letting her hair hang between them, sighing as he wrapped his arms around her waist. “I love you,” she said, easily, like she’d been telling him that forever.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I love you too,” Peeta said, his lips against her sternum. When she didn’t move, he kissed up her chest to that ticklish spot at the hollow of her neck.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good,” she told him, pulling back and looking down into his eyes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you hungry?” Peeta asked her, his thumb rubbing a pattern into her hip.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Starving, actually,” she said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He tilted his chin up to meet her, so Katniss pecked a kiss on his lips. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, you go shower, and then I’ll shower, and we’ll have some breakfast. After that, it should be time to go. Sound good?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sounds good.”</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Comments and kudos are love- let me know what you think! Like I said in the chapter notes, there will be more plot advancement in the next chapter (lol), which will probably be the second from the last. I haven't forgotten the actual plot or anything.</p><p>I'm @endlessnightlock on Tumblr as well</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>After bumping their way down the long drive to the distinct, crunching sound of tiny pieces of gravel popping beneath the tires to break the silence, Peeta pulled over in front of the barn. He shifted the Jeep into park and cut off the motor. Katniss remained silent, too busy looking at her surroundings to carry on a conversation; she liked to absorb beautiful things and give herself a chance to soak them in before opening her mouth.</p><p> </p><p>It had been a little bit of a drive to get here from his dad’s house. Peeta took them past open fields and woods, up and down sloping hills for what seemed like an eternity before they arrived. On the way, he took so many turns in the unfamiliar countryside that Katniss had doubts about whether or not she could find her way back into town without a GPS if she had to. Half of the roads didn’t have names, only numbers, which added to her confusion. About a million side roads jutted out haphazardly from other routes, seemingly without purpose. </p><p> </p><p>Despite the confusing drive, she could understand why Peeta still spoke fondly of it even with the life-altering accident that took place here. Katniss felt silly for arguing with him about coming today; she was glad he’d convinced her to come.</p><p> </p><p>The farm was a beautiful place, tucked away from the world the way it was. It sat low in a valley, with an old brick home and the large barn they were parked in front of, along with a handful of other outbuildings scattered around the property. Sloping hills boxed them in, surrounded by gentle waves of land rolling about and dense, wooded hills running along the fields’ edges. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss had always lived in urban areas, but something about the wide-open space and the sense of being more connected to the earth and nature, providing for oneself- raising animals and growing food, really appealed to something untapped inside her. </p><p> </p><p>In another life, she thought she easily could’ve lived a wilder existence.</p><p> </p><p>“Ready to meet everyone?” Peeta asked, reaching for his seatbelt.</p><p> </p><p>“I think so,” she said as her eyes flitted around the multitude of sights competing for her attention outside the Jeep. “It’s a lovely place.”</p><p> </p><p>It was late spring, and despite the awakening, new growth she’d already witnessed in downtown Panem where the trees were budding again, and the green spaces in front of the shops had begun springing back to life, none of that could compete with the scenery here. </p><p> </p><p>Here the surroundings were incredibly verdant and lush. The rolling landscape was thick with dense grass and clover. Katniss had noticed some tulips and azaleas and greenery coming up next to the brick farmhouse. They appeared to be well-loved faithfully-tended flowers, but what caught her eye was the scattered patches of violets interspersed with short dandelions among the shockingly green grass. </p><p> </p><p>As much as she enjoyed the pristine beauty of the nearly perfect hot-house-grown specimens she and Prim worked with at the flower shop, something about the stubborn wildflowers and weeds made Katniss happier. Violets were like the first blush of earth’s warmth, and dandelions were the promise of warm weather and the growing season waiting just around the corner.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss glanced out of the corner of her eye at Peeta. There was something very dandelion-like about him, she decided, indulging the dreamy bent of her thoughts. Not just because his outlook on life was bright and sunny, but the way being with him had influenced her view, coaxing her out of her shell and into being a more active participant in her life again.</p><p> </p><p>“But beautiful doesn’t seem quite right. What’s the word I’m looking for?” Katniss pulled herself out of her musing finally and went on. </p><p> </p><p>When the term finally popped into her head, she crowed like a triumphant rooster. “Picturesque! That’s it.”</p><p> </p><p>“Aww, listen to you using your words.” Peeta leaned across the console and kissed her. “You’re too cute.”</p><p> </p><p>“Shut up, Mellark,” she swatted at his arm, laughing. </p><p> </p><p>The two of them got out, and she met him at the driver’s side. </p><p> </p><p>“Is the gravel harder to walk on?” Katniss asked, referring to his prosthetic leg. “It seems like it might be-the surface constantly shifts when you step on it.”</p><p> </p><p>“It is kind of a bitch when it’s deep like this, but I’m used to it.” He took her hand as they started walking towards the large, brick house. “Hold on to me, though; I might need you to hold me up if I start to fall,” he teased. </p><p> </p><p>“How about we just head for the yard,” Katniss said drily, “the ground looks firmer there.” There was no way she could get Peeta upright again if he went down.</p><p> </p><p>He spoke up once they were on solid ground again. “Thanks for making that side trip to the hospital with me- I’m probably worrying about nothing because I know Dad could be worse, but damn, he scared the shit out of me. I keep feeling like I need to go check on him.”</p><p> </p><p>“That’s alright,” she said, shaking her head. What kind of a girlfriend tells someone they can’t go and see their sick parent? “Your mom seemed happy to see you.”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, I think she was glad we came early. It was better than if I’d have shown up at the same time with Phil and Rye. She’s afraid we’ll tire Dad out.”</p><p> </p><p>It hadn’t taken them long to get ready and have breakfast, so when Peeta asked if Katniss minded stopping by the hospital before they drove out to the countryside, she readily agreed. </p><p> </p><p>Peeta’s mom was already in the room when they arrived; his dad seemed tired but better than the day before. They didn’t stay long, half an hour or so, but left with a promise that Peeta would be back in time for the doctor’s visit with his dad that afternoon.</p><p> </p><p>“She was happy to see the coffee we brought her anyway,” Katniss added.</p><p> </p><p>He laughed.</p><p> </p><p>“Besides, we’re here because of your dad,” she said. “I didn’t assume this was some romantic weekend getaway we were having or anything.”</p><p> </p><p>“No, I know that,” Peeta raised their joined hands to his lips and kissed the top of hers affectionately. “But it has been kind of romantic. Hasn’t it?”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss smiled down at her feet. Despite all the stress with his dad, it had been romantic in spots- he’d told her he loved her; did it get any more romantic than that?  “Yeah, it has been,” she agreed. </p><p> </p><p>“And sexy- which is romantic too, don’t you think?”</p><p> </p><p>“I guess so, yeah,” Katniss kept walking, eyes forward, her body warming from more than just the sun streaming down on them. </p><p> </p><p>Glancing his way, she caught the bemused look on his face- Peeta pressed his lips tightly together to stop his laughter. </p><p> </p><p>“I’ve got to be honest with you,” he said, “that was sexy as hell this morning- like, every guy’s fantasy. I honestly feel like I went wandering in a magical forest and found a unicorn or something.”</p><p> </p><p>“A unicorn?” Katniss stopped walking to stare at him. Did he just compare her to a unicorn because of sex? She covered the lower half of her face with her hand, clawing at her skin because she felt like crawling out of it. “We’re at your family’s house- what if someone hears you?”</p><p> </p><p>“No one’s going to hear, and besides, it’s a farm. It’s nothing new. A little sex talk isn’t going to scare anyone off.”</p><p> </p><p>“That’s not even- I don’t know what to say to that, Peeta,” Katniss shook her head, flustered. “You just made it sound like everyone living in the country is a bunch of sex fiends.”</p><p> </p><p>Peeta laughed so loudly she was tempted to hush him.</p><p> </p><p>“Quit taking everything I say so seriously. Besides, miss “we’re at your family’s house” I have some news for you. We were at my dad’s house this morning.” </p><p> </p><p>She looked away from his cheeky grin, but the humor in his voice was still glaringly apparent. </p><p> </p><p>“Didn’t seem to hinder anything then, so why so shy now? I thought maybe my childhood hangouts were your kink or something. If that’s the case, let’s swing by my old high school, and we’ll break in through one of the windows. I’d like to see what we could do in the art room.”</p><p> </p><p>“You’re being so immature! I’m not talking to you about this. And you’d better shut up if you want this “unicorn” again any time soon.” </p><p> </p><p>Peeta stopped walking long enough to try and pull her close, but she shrugged him off. </p><p> </p><p>He had to know she was still embarrassed about the fact that she’d pretty much <em> gushed </em>all over the sheets at his father’s house (who fucking did that, anyway?) of all places, so why was he still talking about it? </p><p> </p><p>It wasn’t that she was embarrassed about her body’s reaction to him or whatever the hell it was- it just would have been her preference to discover new sexual things about herself in the comfort of her own home. There were too many new things to think about this weekend already. The weird emotional, run-down feeling Katniss was dealing with on top of everything else already had her unsettled and on-edge, and it left her in no humor for Peeta to tease her about the sex they’d had. Nothing her body or mind was doing made any sense to her right now.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta wouldn’t let up, though. He insisted on drawing her close, so Katniss gave in, letting him pull her under his arm although she remained decidedly stiff-shouldered. When he leaned over and whispered in her ear, his breath warm and damp, it made the tiny hairs on the back of her neck stand up from his proximity. She hated the way her body still responded to him without any consideration to whether she was irritated or not. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m surprised, is all,” he admitted. “I didn’t even know women did that kind of stuff outside of porn.”</p><p> </p><p>Was that supposed to be a compliment- because It sure as hell didn’t feel that way. Not only that, what was Peeta doing watching porn? </p><p> </p><p>Anger and something more profound pricking at her feelings flared, leaving a tightness in her chest. Katniss reached around his back and pinched his side in retaliation, catching him off guard. </p><p> </p><p>“Ow!” Peeta half-shouted, jerking away from her. He frowned, rubbing his side. “That hurt, you know- you’ve got a mean grip to those little fingers.”</p><p> </p><p>“Good! And you're fine,” Katniss said, poking him in the ribcage for emphasis. She hadn’t pinched him that hard. Besides- she wanted it to hurt a little bit. </p><p> </p><p>“What are you doing watching that anyway?” she asked, retracting her arm and crossing them both over her chest. She covered the hurt she felt with anger.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta shrugged, smiling at her in that golden-retriever-like way he had when he was trying to reassure her that things were fine. Today, it did nothing.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss had to admit it- knowing he was watching porn <em> bothered </em> her even if it was stupid for her to feel that way. It wasn’t that she was prudish or anything, everyone had needs, and Peeta didn’t owe her free reign over his viewing habits, or whatever you’d call it. She just wasn’t crazy about him looking at other naked women and comparing them to her; that was all. </p><p> </p><p>And besides that- they had sex all the time! When was Peeta watching it? In the middle of the night when she was asleep? Did he get up and compare her moves with the women on screen? </p><p> </p><p>What the hell.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta studied her face, clearly astonished by her fierce frown that wasn’t going away despite his best efforts to lighten the situation. “You don’t have to get mad about it. I don’t watch it anymore.” He went on, and she could tell he was trying to make her laugh, to defect her anger with humor. “I have you now if I want to see a naked woman.”</p><p> </p><p>“Is that supposed to be some sort of a compliment?” Katniss asked, dumbfounded by his obtuseness. “So I’m just there for you to look at when you want to see a naked body?”</p><p> </p><p>“And touch one,” he added. “Look at it this way- we could watch it together sometime if you’re interested. That would be fun. We could try and act some things out-”</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t-” </p><p> </p><p>Peeta needed to stop talking. </p><p> </p><p>“That's not- listen. You don’t have to act like you don’t-” Katniss stopped trying when the words began tumbling over each other in frustration. She knew she wasn’t fair; she was trying to put a halt to the whirling thoughts in her head despite being mad. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss had no interest in micromanaging everything about Peeta’s life- she just wished he would have told her about his viewing habits before now, was all. </p><p> </p><p>She felt blindsided by the knowledge. And she was hurt. She couldn't lie to herself about that- it hurt her feelings. Wasn’t she enough on her own?</p><p> </p><p>She remained silent for so long that eventually, Peeta sighed. His voice sounded different, resigned. “I’m not <em> lying </em>. I didn’t do it that much before I met you, anyway. I’m not some kind of horny freak-”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss held up her hand to stop him. “I don’t care about that- I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with it-”</p><p> </p><p>“It kind of sounds like you are saying that, Katniss,” he insisted, irritation creeping into his tone too. “Guys are just wired-”</p><p> </p><p>“Girls watch it too,” she interrupted him, “It’s not just a male thing.”</p><p> </p><p>Shit, she hadn’t meant to make him feel bad; Katniss wished she could rewind the clock to when they’d stepped out of the Jeep and take back those things she’d said. Why had his comment irritated her so much in the first place? Katniss didn’t know how she felt right about anything at the moment. Multiple things- everything seemed to be bothering her- and then she’d hurt his feelings, so now they both felt terrible. Awesome.</p><p> </p><p>“You don’t watch it, though,” he said matter-of-factly.</p><p> </p><p>“No, I don’t,” she agreed- feeling helpless, like a spectator standing outside her body and watching the mood between them deteriorate down to garbage.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta frowned at her. “I’ve seen those romance novels at your place. I know you’re no stranger to smut either, so what’s the difference?”</p><p> </p><p>“There is a difference,” Katniss insisted, frowning at him. She did admittedly like trashy romance novels, and yeah, the love scenes in her paperbacks may be particularly dog-eared, but that was beside the point. Sex scenes in books were imaginary- they were about how it made you feel, and it wasn’t right in front of your face- there weren’t real girls on-screen with huge tits and perfect bodies who were much more attractive than she was. “But that’s not the point, and I’m not judging you.” </p><p> </p><p>“There’s nothing-” Katniss went on, getting increasingly frustrated because this conversation was spiraling into an argument and quickly. It was kind of his fault for bringing up the sex this morning, though, and comparing her to a fucking unicorn, she reminded herself. The subject wouldn’t have come up if not for that, so this entire conversation was his doing. “You just caught me off guard, is all.”</p><p> </p><p>Peeta stared over her shoulder- he wouldn’t look her in the eye. “I don’t know what you want me to say. Sometimes I just got lonely, and you know I didn’t date much before you, not with my leg and all. You forget what a naked woman looks like if you haven’t seen one in a while.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss couldn't help rolling her eyes at that. “Sure you do.”</p><p> </p><p>“Okay, that’s not true,” he admitted. “Doesn’t mean you don’t miss seeing them, though.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss stared at him as the silence drug on, uneasiness choking her, pressing into her lungs because she didn’t know what to say to him now. </p><p> </p><p>She’d made him think something was wrong with him for having needs. Peeta was honest with her the way he always was, and she’d gotten angry about it. She still didn’t understand how he thought something as minor as an amputated leg made him unattractive to women. He was such a vibrant, gorgeous, outwardly confident person- but for whatever reason, he did feel that way. His leg must have made some sort of difference when meeting people; it wasn’t the first time he’d mentioned it regarding his previous dating experiences. </p><p> </p><p>As outgoing as he was, Katniss usually assumed those hangups had to be in his head. Sometimes though, like now, taking in his pinched expression as he stared over her shoulder, she realized maybe it wasn’t all in his head, not exactly. Peeta was an expert at slipping on a persona of confidence. </p><p> </p><p>She’d known him long enough to see the other side of it- the sensitive, easily-wounded man who felt like a burden sometimes, even to his loved ones. He tended to pull away when hurt like now, so yes, he would take any rejection over his amputated leg hard instead of brushing it off as being the girl’s problem and not his own.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss sighed. If a few stupid girls had turned him down over something as meaningless as a physical disability? That was their loss and her gain. Where would she be now if she’d never met him? </p><p> </p><p>She wouldn’t be this happy. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss supposed she was just an insecure idiot sometimes, but admittedly so was he. And she needed to apologize to him. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m not judging you for watching porn,” she repeated. “And I don’t think you’re lying to me about not doing it anymore. It wouldn’t matter if you did. I wouldn't love it-” </p><p> </p><p>The corner of his mouth tipped up. He was listening but didn’t acknowledge Katniss yet. The entire conversation was one loud, glaring reminder that they both had their hangups. What could she say? That was life; no one was perfect. </p><p> </p><p>“And I love you, but you’re still a pervert,” she went on. “And I’m not taking that part back.”</p><p> </p><p>Peeta laughed under his breath, his stance visibly relaxing. Katniss could tell he wanted to give in, that he was getting close to relenting. Finally, he sighed, and it felt exactly like relief. When he moved towards her, she met him halfway, letting him wrap his arms around her without a hint of struggle.</p><p> </p><p>“But you know all of my perverted thoughts revolve around you now, right? So, so many perverted thoughts.” His breath was warm against her neck, and Katniss squeaked when he turned his head and nipped her earlobe, catching her off guard. </p><p> </p><p>His confidence seemed to be making a quick return, at least. “You give me lots of inspiration. And this morning? The way you were just-” his breath shuddered, “damn.”</p><p> </p><p>And just like that, Katniss wasn’t mad anymore. Not a bit. Not with the feel of the heat rolling off Peeta’s body from their proximity and the way he spoke about her like she was the embodiment of all of his fantasies wrapped up in the package of the girl he was in love with. </p><p> </p><p>“That’s going to be burned in my brain forever. Why would I want anyone else?” She tried to think of a comeback, she did, but her throat went dry at the intense look in Peeta’s eyes when he pulled away to stare down at her. “You’re beautiful and sexy, and I love you so much. No one compares to you. You’re perfect for me.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss was speechless. She knew her feelings had to be written all over her face because the things she felt for him were impossible to hide. It was scary and exhilarating both. </p><p> </p><p>She was still trying to find her voice when they were interrupted by the sound of a girl’s voice from behind them and accompanying footsteps racing through the gravel at her back.</p><p> </p><p>“Peeta, you made it!” </p><p>
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</p><p>“This is Mirabelle. She’s my favorite of the lambs,” Rue, Peeta’s niece, explained as she came out of the barn stall with a small, black-wooled sheep in her arms. She held the baby securely against her body with practiced ease; it was apparent the teenage girl had a genuine love for their animals. She’d painstakingly showed and told Katniss about their milk cows and calves, their bull, their chickens and ducks. Rue had saved her favorite animals- the sheep, and goats, to show her last. “I’m going to show her at our county fair this fall, for one of my 4-H projects,” she explained, coming to a stop in front of Katniss and sliding the lamb into her waiting, outstretched arms. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss had never held anything but the occasional cat or dog before, so she laughed in delight as the small, fuzzy little lamb nuzzled under her arms, presumably looking for food or a way of escape. “She’s so cute!” she said.</p><p> </p><p>Thom and Cecelia, Peeta’s aunt and uncle, came out of the house moments after Rue found them. They’d made Katniss feel welcome and relaxed, essentially melting the rest of her anxiety away with their friendliness. They’d talked to the adults for a while. In the end, Thom and Cecelia deferred to Rue to show her around the farm. Of course, Peeta knew where everything was himself and could have just as easily taken her around on his own, but Rue was excited about playing tour guide. Peeta had already told Katniss some things about her, so she already knew a little going in but quickly found she liked her very much. Rue was a great kid, funny and whip-smart. </p><p> </p><p>Once her mom and dad left, Rue got their ATV out of the barn to use to show them around. The all-terrain vehicle was small and golf-cart-like, with a bed on the back to haul things around instead of having a second set of seats. </p><p> </p><p>When she pulled it up to where they stood and ordered them to hop in with a “well, what are you waiting on?” expression, Peeta told Katniss to get in the front seat- he would ride while he rode in the small bed. “She’s been dying to meet you,” he admitted, his voice low so Rue couldn’t hear them, “I know she’s going to want to get to know you.”</p><p> </p><p>“You’ve talked to her about me?” Peeta had mentioned his cousin several times, and she’d seen a few pictures of her, but still, Katniss hadn’t expected that. </p><p> </p><p>It always surprised her to know people were thinking of her when she wasn’t around.</p><p> </p><p>“Of course, I had to ask for her opinion on stuff. She’s my go-to girl for advice on women,” he said.</p><p> </p><p>Rue must’ve heard- she was still giggling when Katniss took her seat in the front while Peeta climbed into the bed of the ATV and sat down. Once they settled, she took off behind the wheel of the ATV, behind the barn, and out around the property. </p><p> </p><p>The three of them first drove around the edge of the field with its vast stretches of turned-up soil, where they would begin planting crops next week. “Is this a busy time of year?” Katniss asked, pushing some loose hair from out of her eyes.</p><p> </p><p>“It’s so busy!” Rue said, “but a lot of it is fun stuff. We tapped the trees about a month ago,” she said, carefully explaining to Katniss how every year they collected sap to boil down and make maple syrup. They saved it for the family’s use because it didn’t amount to enough to sell at the farmer’s market.</p><p> </p><p>Eventually, she took them back up by the front of the property to the small apple orchard Katniss hadn’t noticed from the road. “We press cider in the fall,” Rue told her, pointing to the grove of trees, “and that we do sell. Well, I take it to the farm market when our pumpkin patch is ready too. Mom and Dad let me keep whatever money I make from that since I have to do a lot of the work myself.” </p><p> </p><p>“Well, that seems fair,” Katniss said. “I’d love to try some of your cider- that sounds delicious.” </p><p> </p><p>“It is really good. You and Peeta have to come back for a visit in the fall when it’s ready,” Rue said. She glanced at Katniss out of the corner of her eye. “He’s never brought a girl here before now, you know,” she admitted.</p><p> </p><p>“Really?” Peeta had never mentioned that.</p><p> </p><p>“Really,” Rue confirmed. “You’re the first. He must love you a lot; it’s a good thing.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss wasn’t sure what to say, so she kept quiet.</p><p> </p><p>While the two of them talked, with Peeta occasionally piping in when the ATV was at a standstill, Katniss found herself appreciating more and more that she’d had the opportunity to come today. </p><p>She was so glad Peeta and Rue had shared this with her. </p><p> </p><p>The whole weekend had been good, minus the initial awkwardness of meeting his family. (Of course, his dad’s hospitalization wasn’t ideal, and neither was the argument they had half an hour ago) If things were growing more serious between them, and by all intents and purposes they were, meeting his family would’ve had to happen at some point. Katniss was just surprised by how much she liked them all and how welcoming they’d been.</p><p> </p><p>Rue finally brought them back up to the barn to see the animals, which they were currently doing. </p><p> </p><p>“She’s probably not going to let you hold her for long, though,” she told Katniss, nodding at the squirming lamb.</p><p> </p><p>“No,” she laughed as the animal wriggled in her lap. “I imagine she won’t. I wouldn’t like it either. No, I wouldn’t,” she repeated in a sing-song voice to the lamb, who blinked its eyes at her before attempting to scramble away again. “Peeta- please tell me you remembered to get pictures of the animals for Prim. I completely forgot about it until now.”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah,” Peeta said, putting his arm around her waist, leaning in for a shot of the lamb. “I’ve got you covered.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss looked over to see him snapping pictures with his phone. “I just don’t know if Prim will be able to tell the difference between Mirabelle and her brother, though. They’re almost identical.”</p><p> </p><p>“Who cares,” Katniss said flippantly, “they’re all adorable. Prim will be happy.”</p><p> </p><p>Peeta’s phone vibrated with an incoming text a moment later. “She says thanks for the pictures,” he read her message, “but now she wants to see the goats; says she always wanted one, but your mom and dad wouldn’t let her have it?”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss sighed. “It’s true. I tried to help her out, but they wouldn’t listen to me.”</p><p> </p><p>Rue laughed. “We can go see the goats now. Here, let me put Mirabelle back in her pen. I’ll introduce you to Lady next. She’s pregnant.”</p><p> </p><p>Peeta excused himself for a minute, leaving the two girls alone.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss stood up to follow Rue outside to the goat pen, taking her phone out of her pocket as she went as a reminder to get some pictures so Prim wouldn’t have her head.</p><p> </p><p>Rue seemed to be hem-hawing over something; Katniss realized, now that the two of them were alone- she worried a corner of her fingernail between her teeth as they walked and kept glancing her way and then forward again. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss finally caught her eye and stopped walking, causing Rue to stop as well. “Something on your mind?” she asked, amused- what could be so serious that she was working herself up this way?</p><p> </p><p>Rue shook her head. “No. Yes, actually. No.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss laughed.</p><p> </p><p>“It’s just that I probably shouldn’t say. Mom tells me just to keep it to myself, that it’s going to get me into trouble one day. I’ve had a few close calls already.”</p><p> </p><p>Rue obviously couldn't’ just say that without piquing her curiosity. </p><p> </p><p>“You can ask whatever you want to, Rue. I don’t mind answering a question. Is it something about Peeta and me?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes, it’s about you and Peeta.” Rue stopped walking to turn and look at her, indecision weighing heavily in her expression. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss gave her an encouraging smile, and Rue seemed to make up her mind, grabbing her hand.  </p><p> </p><p>“So something you may not know, actually we just met, so I’m <em> sure </em> you don’t because it’s nothing your boyfriend knows either is that I have, well, a gift. Actually, I don’t know if <em> gift </em> is the right word for it- it’s more of an ability. Mom says my grandma had it too, and one of my great aunts. I guess it runs in her side of the family.”</p><p> </p><p>“Okay. Is it something bad,” Katniss prodded, encouraging her to come around to the point instead of fretting, “should I be worried?”</p><p> </p><p>“No. It’s just that I can sense certain things. One thing in particular.” Rue’s face screwed up, and then she sighed, resigned like she decided just to spit the words out. “I may as well say it plain. Are you and Peeta going to have a baby?”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss laughed out loud. “No, we’re not planning to have a baby,” she said. “We haven’t been dating that long. I love Peeta, but we still- it’s soon! We haven’t even moved in together yet.” </p><p>How funny- her mother hadn’t even hinted about her and Peeta having a baby yet. Was Rue looking forward to having a new cousin at some point? Maybe she had babies on the brain due to the plethora of new life on the farm. That had to be it.</p><p> </p><p>But Rue stood, frowning at her in contemplation. She wasn’t brushing off Katniss’s response like she’d expected her to do.  “Are you sure? I’m never wrong.”</p><p> </p><p>“Never wrong about what?” Katniss asked, confused. The conversation wasn’t making sense.</p><p> </p><p>“About babies.”</p><p> </p><p>“Wait a minute,” Katniss paused, the humor dropping out of the situation immediately. </p><p> </p><p>She realized Rue was not asking if they were <em> planning </em> to have a baby in the future but asking Katniss <em> if she was pregnant right now. </em>The epiphany hit her over the head like a ton of bricks. “You think I’m pregnant?!” she whispered, unable to keep the distress out of her voice. There was something in the question that nagged at her subconscious.</p><p> </p><p>Rue swore under her breath, an inappropriate word for a teenage girl, but excusable under the circumstances. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m never wrong,” she repeated, eyes wide- nervous but sure about the validity of what she said. “I should have listened to Mom. Katniss, I’m sorry- you didn’t know?”</p><p> </p><p>“No, I’m not. I couldn’t be.” Katniss said as Rue looked away. “I can’t.” </p><p> </p><p>But in her mind, she began tallying up the odd things that’d been happening, not just over the weekend, but lately: her constant fatigue, the need to pee, the mood swings (those had been horrible the last two days), her sensitive breasts- the spotting when it was time for her period to begin that disappeared and never came back. </p><p> </p><p>Spotting- a term sprang to Katniss’s mind, one that Prim’s friend from high school had used when she stopped in the flower shop last week to gush to them about her pregnancy: implantation bleeding.</p><p> </p><p>And then, like following a line of pebbles through the forest that finally drops you off at the end of the trail when you’re home, Katniss remembered. The night, three weeks ago- they’d had sex at the tattoo shop. She’d insisted on it, even though  they didn’t have any condoms with them. After, Peeta told her that he wasn’t sure if he made it out of her body in time, that he might’ve ejaculated while still inside of her. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss had brushed it off. Like a stupid girl on the brink of having everything she ever wanted in a relationship with the best guy she’d ever known, she forgot about that night until now. </p><p> </p><p>“Oh god, I’m pregnant,” she whispered, staring into Rue’s eyes as the realization washed over her.</p><p> </p><p>Because, of course, she was pregnant. </p><p> </p><p>An unplanned pregnancy was precisely the kind of stupid, unthought-out thing Katniss was known for doing.</p><p> </p><p>What was she supposed to do now?</p><p>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So Katniss finally knows about the baby. But Peeta, well, he's still in the dark (I'm sorry, lol). I think the last chapter (maybe an epilogue after? maybe) shouldn't take long- this was the tough one for some reason, even though not a ton of things are happening in it. I don't mean to stress you guys out.</p><p>I actually based Rue's part in this chapter on a lady I was acquainted with who, like Rue, always knew when a woman was pregnant. Like Rue explains to Katniss, this lady told me her ability was an inherited trait that skipped around in the women in her family. How did she know? I have no idea, but when I was only four weeks pregnant with my first daughter (not showing, only my family and coworkers knew, and I'd asked them to keep quiet about it for a while), she called my ass out (lol). She knew. I have no way of explaining it. My personal belief is that some people are more sensitive to things like that than others. </p><p>Also, I imagine Rue as kind of a country girl in the original books, so I wanted to write her that way here. It seemed like a good setting for her. Hope you liked it!</p><p>Anyway, I hope you liked the chapter. Sorry for the wait, and I'll try not to take so long on the rest. Thanks for reading, and don't be afraid to leave a comment if you're feeling it.</p>
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<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Some talking- Prim calls, some relationship stuff, and Peeta finds out about the baby.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Peeta interrupted Katniss from the long, silent, staring out the passenger side window in contemplation session she’d engaged herself in, finally speaking up after the two of them had spent half an hour riding in the Jeep in total silence. </p><p> </p><p>“Is everything okay?” he asked. “You’ve been quiet since we left.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss glanced his way, but Peeta was wisely watching the road and not her. </p><p> </p><p>He was always so careful. Katniss wondered what that was like- thinking things out, not being impulsive the way she was. At least they were in the car where he had to focus elsewhere. If they were doing anything else right now, he would’ve figured out something wasn’t right. Peeta was too perceptive to fool for long. </p><p> </p><p>No, she wasn’t alright. But she wasn’t ready to tell him why. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss’s thoughts had formed a swarm in her mind since Rue’s revelation, each one buzzing and stinging until everything converged into a roaring drone. Hardly anything floating around inside her head could be called a decipherable, individual thought. She felt like disappearing, for a while at least- she couldn't stop cycling through each wildly different scenario the fallout from this could take. </p><p> </p><p>Pregnant. </p><p> </p><p>Pregnant. </p><p> </p><p>Pregnant.</p><p> </p><p>They’d been dating for six months, and she was pregnant. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m fine, ” she carefully lied, angling her body to look out the window again. </p><p> </p><p>“If you’re sure.”</p><p> </p><p>The two of them hadn’t even talked about kids yet, other than a vague conversation here or there. It wasn’t that Katniss didn’t like babies or hadn’t imagined herself with a family someday- she’d assumed those were things that might happen later in life, once she was married and or at least settled down more. Not six months into a relationship.</p><p> </p><p>Biting the inside of her cheek to counteract the urge to scream, Katniss wondered, for the thousandth time that afternoon, how she could have fucked things up so bad. Somehow she managed to push the dread back down that threatened to overtake her- she didn't want to give Peeta a front-row seat to her mental breakdown. </p><p> </p><p>It was pretty early in their relationship for that.</p><p> </p><p>“Just a little tired,” she added for good measure. Then, as casually as possible, she asked- “Is there a drug store near your dad’s house or something? There’s a few things I need to grab while you’re visiting your dad.” </p><p> </p><p>She had to find some way to get a pregnancy test and take it by herself. Rue’s confirmation wasn’t enough- she needed a definitive answer, one way or the other. Then, once she was sure, she could consider how to break the news to Peeta while adequately preparing for his reaction. There was no telling what he would say- she had no frame of reference for this conversation. </p><p> </p><p>What would he think? Would he think she was trying to trap him into marrying her? That was laughable- “catching” a guy had never been high on the list of priorities for her life.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss still wasn’t sure what exactly it was he saw in her in the first place. She would never try to hold Peeta in a relationship against his will- she had more pride than that. Why wouldn’t her thoughts would stop spiraling and slow to a reasonable pace for half a second?</p><p> </p><p>“There’s a RiteAid close by,” Peeta said. “It’s around the corner from Dad’s, but we can just get what you need now.” He began to slow down, moving to flip the turn signal on at the approaching street.</p><p> </p><p>“You don’t have to do that,” she said. </p><p> </p><p>Of course, Peeta would just take her to the store now. He couldn’t do that because she knew he wouldn’t be content to wait in the car, either. For once, she wished he wasn’t so damn considerate. </p><p> </p><p>“I thought I’d walk over while you were at the hospital- there are only a few things. It’s nothing that can’t wait. It seemed like a good way to kill some time while you’re gone.”</p><p> </p><p>“Are you sure?”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss could just imagine the two of them in the store, strolling down the family planning aisle. She’d casually say- </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Oh, by the way, I think I’m pregnant. Remember that time I asked you not to use a condom? Remember how all I was worried about was having sex while you were fine with what we were doing? Remember how reckless I was? Remember that?  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>That couldn’t happen.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss had to know, and she had to have time to think without immediately worrying about Peeta’s reaction. If she wasn’t pregnant by some miracle, she didn’t want to have that conversation with him.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m sure,” she said.</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t mind stopping now. You just told me you were tired.”</p><p> </p><p>Was she imagining the smile on his face wasn’t quite reaching his eyes as he glanced over at her? Could he tell something was wrong? </p><p> </p><p>Katniss knew she wasn’t behaving like her typical self. No scratch that- this was a side she was more than familiar with, but one with who Peeta hadn’t become acquainted yet. The unhinged side. </p><p> </p><p>Would he stay around long enough to learn all of those things about her, how screwed up she was, or would he act as if he’d never known her at all? Did Peeta want to be a father, ever? </p><p> </p><p>Could he tell something was off- he couldn’t read her that well, could he?</p><p> </p><p>Oh god, she was panicking now. The existential dread creeping up her belly and out through her limbs was like an old high school acquaintance you hate who keeps popping up in your life at the worst possible times- the one who never fails to make you feel like an even bigger piece of shit than you thought possible.</p><p> </p><p>“Nothing major, just some tampons,” she lied, hoping Peeta hadn’t noticed the box tucked away in the corner of her overnight bag. “Maybe some vitamins? I’ve been pretty run down lately.”</p><p> </p><p>He frowned. “There’s a CVS pretty close to Dad’s, but I don’t mind taking you now.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m sure. If we go now, you either won’t have time to clean up, or you’ll be late getting back to the hospital. Besides, it’ll give me something to do while you’re gone.”</p><p> </p><p>“You’re sure?”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m sure,” she insisted.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta flipped the turn signal off and began accelerating again. She relaxed slightly- the crisis had been averted for now. She just needed some time.</p><p> </p><p>As he drove away, Katniss glanced down at her mostly flat stomach, trying to imagine what she’d look like with a baby belly. A baby- hers and Peeta’s. </p><p> </p><p>If there was a baby at all, there was still a chance she wasn’t pregnant. She just had to know for sure, and then she’d deal with the rest.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>After debating for a few moments in the drugstore’s family planning aisle, blissfully alone, Katniss picked up the two-pack of pregnancy tests instead of the single. It only cost a few dollars more, and the box promised the most accurate results if taken first thing in the morning. </p><p>She wasn’t waiting until the morning to take one.</p><p> </p><p>If the test she was in the middle of taking now was inconclusive, she’d try it again early tomorrow without Peeta finding out, somehow. The instructions said to wait five minutes before checking the results. A single pink line meant she wasn’t pregnant; two lines said she was. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss couldn’t stop watching the drops of urine soaking through the paper, making their way across the tiny window of the pregnancy test. Too much was on the line, and she was too impatient to wait until the morning. She’d barely kept herself from sprinting back to his dad’s house. </p><p> </p><p>Eyes glued to the little window, the first pink test line showed quickly. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss didn’t blink, waiting to see whether or not the second line would appear.</p><p> </p><p>A moment later, just like she was sure it would, the second pink line appeared- bright, distinct as could be. </p><p> </p><p>She could’ve saved herself a few dollars. </p><p> </p><p>She was pregnant.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Carefully wrapping the used test in toilet paper, Katniss hid it in a shopping bag underneath the sink. She washed her shaking hands and brought the second test out to the guest room, stuffing it into the inside zipper of her overnight bag. She knew hiding the tests was a fruitless exercise- she wouldn’t be able to keep the truth from Peeta for long. </p><p>For some reason, that unused pregnancy test just seemed to mock her. She couldn’t stand to look at it.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss made her way to the bed and sat down, too dazed to go any farther. She was in limbo, frozen with indecision. Peeta hadn’t said when he would be back. He’d been gone a while, though, and she doubted it would be much longer. She had to get her head on straight before then- she was a terrible actress. </p><p> </p><p>If they were back in Panem, she could find some way to put some space between them. Then she'd have more time to think about what she should do. Not here, though, in his hometown, visiting his family. There was nowhere she could go, no place to run away.</p><p> </p><p>She was trying to figure out what in the hell she was going to do, and quickly because she needed some sort of plan when Prim called. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss didn’t mean to answer the phone. It was just that her hands were shaking so bad she inadvertently swiped the face time button instead of silencing it.</p><p> </p><p>“Hey!” Prim’s face popped up on the screen, startling her. </p><p> </p><p>“Hey.”</p><p> </p><p>Prim was sitting in the workroom of the flower shop. It didn’t look as though there were heaps of bouquets waiting to be delivered, so that meant things hadn’t been too chaotic while she was gone. That made Katniss feel marginally better.</p><p> </p><p>“What’s up?” Prim asked.</p><p> </p><p>Oh, the usual, Katniss thought, more dumb shit from your big sister. I haven’t done anything equally life-altering and stupid in a while, so that couldn’t last. </p><p> </p><p>“Nothing,” she answered instead, hand at her throat to try and quell the tremble in her voice. She tried clearing the tightness away with a cough- it didn’t seem to work, but she forced a smile anyway. “Just hanging out. Peeta’s at the hospital.”</p><p> </p><p>“You stay behind?”</p><p> </p><p>She shifted on the bed. “Yeah, I just feel underfoot there. I stopped in with Peeta for a few minutes this morning. I don’t know- if I were his dad, I don’t think I’d want some random person hanging out in my hospital room.”<br/>
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</p><p>Prim laughed. “Well, you’re his son’s girlfriend, so you’re not just some random person.”</p><p> </p><p>“You know what I mean.”</p><p> </p><p>Her eyes began to water unexpectedly at the mention of Peeta’s father- her boyfriend had so much on his plate right now, the timing of this couldn’t get much worse. Katniss hoped to get this conversation moving along before she had a breakdown in front of Prim.</p><p> </p><p>“What did you think of the animals?” she asked to cover the silence that had fallen over the conversation. </p><p> </p><p>“Oh, they were adorable. The goats were the cutest. But Katniss,” Prim moved the screen closer to her face. “Something isn’t right with you. Your eyes look red. What’s going on? Did you guys get into an argument?”</p><p> </p><p>“No. Nothing’s wrong,” Katniss repeated. It wasn’t true but probably as good as anything else she could come up with to tell Prim. “I’m fine.”</p><p> </p><p>“You’re lying.”</p><p> </p><p>“I am not!” she cleared her throat. She had to redirect this conversation somehow. “It looks like you’ve kept everything under control there. Has it been busy?”</p><p> </p><p>Prim rolled her eyes. “Kind of, but nothing I couldn’t handle. Typical weekend.”</p><p> </p><p>“Good.”</p><p> </p><p>“The real reason I called is that Mom wants us to come over Tuesday for dinner. Effie is in town for a few days. She wants you to bring Peeta- Eff says she’s dying to meet him.”</p><p> </p><p>Despite Katniss’s determination to keep the truth from her, Prim’s voice soothed her nerves a little. She was too nosy sometimes and an overall pest occasionally, but she didn’t know what she would do without her little sister. She was her best friend.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m surprised she hasn’t demanded it before now,” Katniss said. Their great-aunt Effie couldn’t stand being out of the loop for long, especially when it came to someone her nieces were dating. “Yeah, if you want to tell Mom- that should be fine. I’ll be there at least if he can’t make it.”</p><p> </p><p>“And I got a bill from one of the suppliers I wanted to ask you about,” Prim added. “I thought the totals seemed off on it. I’m not sure if we got all of the flowers listed; one of our deliveries was short a few weeks ago, and I didn’t know if they dropped off the extras like they were supposed to.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m pretty sure they didn’t- do you want me to call and check?”</p><p> </p><p>“No, I can handle that myself.” Prim paused. “What I want is for you to tell me what’s going on.”</p><p> </p><p>Ah, she should have known better. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss rubbed the heel of her hand against her eye socket. Her head was beginning to throb.  “It’s nothing that can’t wait until we get back, ” she finally said.</p><p> </p><p>“But something is bothering you.”</p><p> </p><p>“It’s nothing I can talk about yet.”</p><p> </p><p>Prim frowned at the screen. “What do you mean- <em> yet</em>? You’re acting strange.”</p><p> </p><p>“And you’re nosy. Maybe that’s why I’m acting weird!”</p><p> </p><p>“Katniss-”</p><p> </p><p>She huffed. “I need to tell Peeta first, okay? It wouldn’t be right if you found out before him.”</p><p> </p><p>“What are you saying?”</p><p> </p><p>“I can’t tell you yet, is what I’m saying.”</p><p> </p><p>There was silence on the line as the sisters stared at each other. The thought flashed through Katniss’s mind that she probably ought to disconnect before the conversation went any further, but she couldn’t make herself do it. It was like Prim held her mesmerized with her baby blue eyes.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh my god- you’re pregnant!” Prim burst out in a loud whisper. Her eyebrows seemed to travel halfway up her forehead in surprise. But certainty, there was certainty in her face too, damn it. </p><p> </p><p>She’d figured it out. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss sighed. Could she not screw any part of this up?<br/>
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</p><p>“That has to be it- why else would you have to tell Peeta something before you told me?”</p><p> </p><p>“There could be all kinds of things I’d need to tell him before you. Maybe I wrecked his car. Maybe I set fire to his childhood treehouse-”</p><p> </p><p>“But you didn’t,” Prim interrupted. “It’s none of those things, is it? You’re pregnant.”</p><p> </p><p>Well, this wasn’t the way she’d imagine telling the first person in her life about the baby. To Katniss’s horror, she burst into sudden, unexpected, ugly tears. For the second time in two days.</p><p> </p><p>This baby was turning out to be kind of a lot to handle already; it was making her feel crazy. </p><p> </p><p>Oh, she shouldn’t think that- Katniss felt immediately guilty. She would make a terrible mother.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh god- you’re upset,” Prim whispered, looking guilty. She rushed in to offer comfort. “I made you cry? Oh no, I’m sorry. You’re not happy about it?”</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t know,” Katniss admitted weakly. “I don’t know what to think or how to feel. How can I do something like this? How can I ask Peeta to be a father? We’ve never even talked about kids, not really.”</p><p> </p><p>“What’s his family like?” </p><p> </p><p>Katniss frowned at her sister’s image on the phone screen. The question stopped her tears at least, so she could swipe at her eyes. “What does that have to do with anything?”</p><p> </p><p>“Are they close, I mean. Does his family seem pretty normal? Not, you know what I mean- what even is normal-  not dysfunctional?”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss remembered Peeta describing his family to her as dysfunctional; when in reality, they didn’t seem that way at all. Every family had something weird going on. His mom and dad’s bond was probably dysfunctional, but you’d have that with the overall weirdness of their can’t live with each other, can’t live without each other relationship. </p><p> </p><p>“They seem to be,” she said. “I liked them. Peeta’s mom is kind of intimidating, but I think I got her approval.”</p><p> </p><p>“Well, that’s a good sign. It sounds like his family is emotionally mature, like there’s a good support system in place and all.” Prim paused. “I don’t know if this helps anything, but I think he’d make a good father, Katniss.”</p><p> </p><p>“What are you, a psychologist?”<br/>
<br/>
“Nope, just a lowly florist. And you know that me and Mom would help you, even if Peeta didn’t want to.”</p><p> </p><p>“I know that,” she managed.</p><p> </p><p>Prim brought the phone closer to her face. She frowned, her eyes looking a little shiny. “Hey, I’m sorry I got you so worked up. I wish I hadn’t pushed you so hard. But you know I love you, right? And whatever you decide to do, I’m behind you. Don’t let me pressure you or anything. If you don’t want to keep it, then that’s up to you.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss pressed her fingertips to her lips to stop them from trembling. That was the problem- she didn’t know what she wanted to do. She just needed to calm down. She needed a quiet moment. “Just don’t say anything to Mom right now? She’ll have to know; it’s just that if we don’t-”</p><p> </p><p>“I won’t.”</p><p> </p><p>In the middle of the silence forming between them, Katniss heard a sound from inside the house. </p><p>The door that led out of the kitchen and into Mr. Mellark’s garage was opening, which meant Peeta was back. She wiped her eyes again and then her nose with the back of her hand before clearing her throat. The timing might be terrible, she was an absolute mess, but she had to tell Peeta eventually. May as well get it over with while she was already upset- the seal was already broken on her emotions, she might as well pour the rest out and find out how things were going to land.</p><p> </p><p>“I’ve got to let you go. Peeta’s here. I’ll let you know how it goes later.”</p><p> </p><p>Prim didn’t say anything, just blew her sister a kiss from the other side of the screen before disconnecting.</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>When Katniss met Peeta in the doorway of his dad’s kitchen with the positive pregnancy test in her hand, she witnessed something she never thought she would- her always-in-control boyfriend stunned into silence. Instead of answering when she asked- “Peeta, are you alright?” he walked to the kitchen table and pulled out a chair. He sat down heavily, no emotion on his face. Not joy, not anger, not fear, nothing- just a careful, expressionless mask.</p><p> </p><p>Oh god, what was he thinking? </p><p> </p><p>“Please say something,” Katniss whispered, pulling out the chair beside him and sitting down because she didn’t have the energy to stand any longer. It was like everything drained from her once the words <em>I’m</em> <em>pregnant</em> crossed her lips. Of course, the underlying panic was still there. His silence wasn’t helping at all.</p><p> </p><p>Peeta turned in his chair. “Is that test what you needed to get at the drugstore?” he asked, looking at the test in her hand. </p><p> </p><p>“Yes,” she said.</p><p> </p><p>Why was Peeta so concerned with how she got the test? Wasn’t he concerned with how the slip-up happened that resulted in a pregnancy? Although he could probably guess- they’d only skipped using protection that one time, but still. Katniss was waiting for his anger or something, not whatever this thing he was doing right now was.</p><p> </p><p>He sighed- a tired sound. Weariness; that’s precisely how she would describe his present state, which she didn’t understand. Didn’t he realize how bad she’d screwed up? Didn’t he realize this was her fault?</p><p> </p><p>“Why didn’t you let me take you?” he asked.</p><p> </p><p>Katniss crossed her arms over her middle. “I wanted to know first before I had to tell you.”</p><p> </p><p>“Had to tell me,” he repeated. “I guess I’m just wondering why you didn’t <em>want </em>to tell me, Kat; I don’t get why you didn’t want to talk to me about this. How long have you suspected?”</p><p> </p><p>“Just today. I didn’t think that the weird way I’ve been feeling could mean this. But all the symptoms were there. The mood swings, the spotting I had. It was Rue who told me, though. She can tell- she’s never wrong.”</p><p> </p><p>“Wrong about what?”</p><p> </p><p>“Babies,” Katniss whispered miserably. “Rue said she could tell when women are pregnant. And she told me I was, and I realized it was probably true. I took the test while you were gone because I had to know.”</p><p> </p><p>“That’s why you were so quiet on the ride here, wasn’t it?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yes.”</p><p> </p><p>Peeta sighed. “I wish you would’ve let me take you to the store.”</p><p> </p><p>“I just needed to know for sure before I told you. I don’t know why you’re so hung up on that.”</p><p> </p><p>He propped his elbows on his knees and rested his chin on his hand.</p><p> </p><p>“I had to prepare myself to tell you. And now you know, so why are you upset?”</p><p> </p><p>“You mean you had to drive yourself crazy, alone? Katniss,” he finally looked at her. “Why do you feel like you have to hide so much from me?”</p><p> </p><p>She shook her head stubbornly. “I don’t keep things from you, not really.”</p><p> </p><p>Peeta covered his mouth with his hand and groaned. “You are so full of shit right now! You keep all kinds of stuff from me.”</p><p> </p><p>She kind of did if Katniss was honest. </p><p> </p><p>It was just hard to explain everything she was thinking and feeling. If she began talking about herself, she’d never stop because there was too much there to unearth. </p><p> </p><p>“There’s nothing…” she tried to explain, “there’s nothing important I don’t tell you. I just don’t want to drive you crazy with my dumb hang-ups.”</p><p> </p><p>“But that’s what I’m here for,” he said. “I want to know all your hang-ups; I want to know what goes on inside your head. It just feels like you don’t trust me enough to tell me everything, and that <em> hurts </em>.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss shook her head, horrified. Was that really what Peeta thought- she didn’t trust him? </p><p> </p><p>Didn’t he realize she was just trying to save him the hassle of the shit that went on inside her head? Didn’t he know that she was scared he wouldn’t love her anymore if he really knew her, all those ugly little bits and pieces?</p><p> </p><p>She trusted him- she just didn’t trust <em>herself</em>.</p><p> </p><p>“I know you say you love me-” she started in.</p><p> </p><p>“I didn’t just say I love you! Katniss, I’m in love with you,” Peeta interjected, straightening up, coming to life like his frustration lit a fire beneath him. “I know we haven’t been together very long, but it’s no exaggeration when I tell you that I don’t want another day of my life to go by without you in it. I’d marry you next goddamn week if you wanted to.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss chose to ignore the “I’d marry you” part of that sentence. That was probably just the whole noble guy thing talking. “What good is loving me, though? Love, it’s, it’s just words. Words never stopped anything from breaking.” </p><p> </p><p>There was a feeling hitting her- like her brain was cracking open. It took over as every fear she’d kept locked up tight ran out of her mouth in one long stream of verbal vomit. God, she wished she could just shut it all back up again, but she couldn’t. “What good is it, you, loving me, when everything always gets fucked up in the end for me, always? Don’t you realize this mess is my fault?”</p><p> </p><p>He stared at her open-mouthed. “What do you mean, what good is it loving you? It’s everything,” he was glaring at her now, frustration evident. “You’re everything to me. And what mess? I see no mess.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss shook her head. “You’re going to get tired of me, though,” she said softly, “I love you, but you’re going to get tired of me because everyone does. You’re too happy and sunny and just-”</p><p> </p><p>Peeta groaned. “You’re overthinking things!”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m overthinking things?” she asked incredulously, “I think you’re underthinking them- you haven’t lived my life! Peeta, I love you, but you barely know me.”</p><p> </p><p>A sad smile crossed his face at the words <em>I</em> <em>love</em> <em>you</em> spoken that way. </p><p> </p><p>Katniss hated to keep saying these things to him, but she couldn’t stop. Once the truth was out, there was no reigning it back in. At least he would know. “You don’t know the way people get tired of me or the way I get tired of them and just push them aside. What if I did that to you or our child? We’re talking about a <em> baby</em>, Peeta, another whole person; if we decide to do this, we don’t get a do-over if we screw it up. So I’d say it’s a huge <em> fucking </em> deal.” </p><p> </p><p>Peeta leaned forward on his haunches; his eyes caught hers, unwavering. His expression was fierce. “I can’t believe you sometimes. You, trying to tell me that you get tired of the people you love. I know you a little better than that, even if we haven’t known each other that long, and even though you won’t tell me everything that goes on inside that pretty little head of yours- which, for the record, I wish you’d start doing. Don’t shut me out.”</p><p> </p><p>“Peeta-”</p><p> </p><p>“All of this? It’s minor. No, wait, it’s less than that. It’s just plain bullshit. It’s the bullshittiest bullshit  I’ve ever heard in my life. Katniss,” he grabbed her hand, “stop telling yourself that you’re an unfeeling, bad person. You don’t get tired of the people you love.”</p><p> </p><p>“But I do-”</p><p> </p><p>“Then you never really loved those people, I’d say, at least not in a permanent way. Some people we outgrow; some people are just meant to pass out of our lives. That doesn’t make you an unfeeling person. What about your sister? Your mom? You’re good to both of them. I see the way you love them, the way you love me. I can feel it, in here,” Peeta smacked his chest, and his tone was eerily calm. The emotion was in his eyes, though. They were blazing. “Get mad, get pissed, whatever, just don’t put up this wall between us! Just tell me what you’re thinking!”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss stared at him. Mad? Yes, she was mad at him, the idiot. She wasn’t sure how they’d gotten to this point- It was scary as hell but exhilarating.<br/>
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</p><p>“Ask anyone else,” she stood up. “I fuck up; it’s what I do! And if I don’t do it, then they do it to me.” </p><p> </p><p>The frustration finally got the best of her when tears began running down her cheeks in an uncontrollable stream. How the hell did she have anything in her left to cry after last night and then again today? It pissed her off so much. Why was she such a mess?</p><p> </p><p>“Everything good always ends too soon for me, Peeta. I didn’t want that with you- ”</p><p> </p><p>“Then why do you keep trying to push me away?” </p><p> </p><p>Peeta, not as gently as he could have, stood up and pulled her into his arms. He crushed her against his body. “You’ve got to stop doing this to me because I love you, and it’s killing me. Stop shutting me out. You’ve got to start telling me things. Quit hiding from me.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss laid her head on his chest. She was shaking in the aftermath of the blow-up, or revelation, or whatever you would call it. She couldn’t believe she’d said all of those things to him; she couldn’t believe he hadn’t run off screaming. </p><p> </p><p>When Peeta spoke again, his voice was calm. She wasn’t sure how or especially the why of the way he was comforting her. “Everything in your life doesn’t have to be fucked-up. Everything isn’t fucked up or undoable. Why are you putting your fears of abandonment, or whatever they are, on me?”</p><p> </p><p>She buried her face in his shirt. </p><p> </p><p>His voice softened, and his arms became less constricting around her body. He’d squeezed her tight like holding a child through her temper tantrum.</p><p> </p><p>Now his arms felt more like the comfort she was used to from him.</p><p> </p><p>“There are things you don’t know about me too, so I’m just going to tell you now. And you’re going to refrain from arguing with me, at least for a minute, okay?”</p><p> </p><p>“What about after?” she asked.</p><p> </p><p>“You can say whatever you want when I’m done with my spiel. Katniss- I’m not a guy that cares lightly. I’m a committer, a monogamist. I’m not the sort of guy who gets tired of things easily. Look at my goddamn body. Do you think I’m afraid of committing to something if I’m willing to cover myself in all of this? There’s no going back from my body art, and I’ve never lost a night’s sleep over any of it.”</p><p> </p><p>“What are you saying?” </p><p> </p><p>“What I’m saying is that once I’ve decided on something, the decision is made, and I don’t change my mind. Period. I might be a punk, but I’m not a wishy-washy, weak-ass, bitch-man.”</p><p> </p><p>Oh god, Katniss couldn’t help the snort that escaped from her throat. She felt his lips curve up in a smile against the top of her head when her body shook with restrained laughter. </p><p> </p><p>“A weak-ass bitch man?”</p><p> </p><p>“I said what I said.”</p><p> </p><p>The two of them stood in silence, quiet settling between them. It wasn’t that everything was fixed, just the relief of sharing things kept locked inside for too long. For better or worse, the truth felt out in the open.</p><p> </p><p>“Do you think you want to keep it?” Peeta asked finally.</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t know,” Katniss whispered. “Maybe. A large part of me does.”</p><p> </p><p>There wasn’t more she could say right then because the fears of the unknown mixed equally with the quiet trill the idea of having a child with Peeta brought her. </p><p> </p><p>It was easy to picture them as a family: she and Peeta, a little dark-haired girl, or a blond boy, in the meadow at his uncle’s farm. </p><p> </p><p>“I’m not going to pressure you if you don’t want it. It’s your choice. But just let me make this clear- if we have this baby? I’m never going to get tired of the two of you, ever. And I’m not going to end things with you if you don’t want this now. It doesn’t mean we can’t do it later.”</p><p> </p><p>“Do you want it?” Katniss asked, her voice low. “I didn’t even get a chance to ask you.”</p><p> </p><p>“Absolutely,” Peeta answered, without a moment’s hesitation. “Yes, I do. But it’s not my decision.”</p><p> </p><p>Katniss bit her lip, her brain whirring and warring with her. Until it stopped, and clarity formed. </p><p>It surprised her how strongly she felt in that moment, how sure; she’d just needed his reassurance that he wanted it too. </p><p> </p><p>The truth slipped out of her mouth, almost unbidden, the way things did when she’d settled something or made up her mind. “I think I want it, too,” she said, “if you’re sure.”</p><p> </p><p>“You don’t have to say that if you don’t mean it,” Peeta said gently, holding her just as close as he had been. “I’m not going to try to tell you what to do.”</p><p> </p><p>She shook her head. “I’m not just saying it. I’m scared as shit, but if you want to do this with me, I want to do this with you.”</p><p> </p><p>“You want to have my baby?” Peeta asked. </p><p> </p><p>His voice sounded funny, and when Katniss looked up at him, there were tears in his eyes. “I do,” she said, more sure by the minute. "Let's have a baby."</p><p><br/>
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</p><p>Later that night, they lay in bed- Katniss as the little spoon to Peeta with his arm around her waist. “I’m going to try to do better,” she said, snuggling closer to him. “I’m not great at talking about my feelings, but I’m going to try.”</p><p> </p><p>Peeta kissed the back of her head. His hand was on her stomach, rubbing a gentle little circle around her belly button. “And I’m going to push you harder to tell me things. I’m not just going to let shit drop anymore,” he warned her. “If we’re going to work, it’s going to take everything we’ve got.”</p><p> </p><p>“I know. We're worth it."</p><p> </p><p>“Not just for us, but for the baby too. I don’t want him or her going through the same thing I did with my parents. Just because I love you like crazy doesn’t mean I want our <em> relationship </em> to become crazy.”</p><p> </p><p>“Me neither.” Katniss took his hand off her belly and pulled it up, kissing his palm. Her voice was sleepy when she said- “Prim was right.”</p><p> </p><p>Peeta curled his fingers around hers. “About what?” he asked.</p><p> </p><p>“She said you’re going to be a great father.”</p><p> </p><p>After a minute of quiet where Katniss could hear birds chirping outside the window, Peeta laughed. “Good old Prim. She’d been in my corner since day one.”</p><p> </p><p>“She has, hasn’t she?”</p><p><br/>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Comments are love, let me know what you think!</p><p>I think I'm going to step away from this one for a short while- I need some time to think about where else I want to take the story; I feel it needs more than one or two more chapters, and I don't want to rush the ending and skim over the characters I've introduced, so I need to do some more planning on the last section. &lt;3</p><p>Katniss and Peeta are in a good place at the end of Eleven, so I'm not leaving anyone with a cliffhanger!</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm a big old fan of feedback, so if you're feeling it leave me a comment and let me know what you thought of the story!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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